Better and Beautiful Weddings!

These are variations on some of the traditional vows which appear in the other links.  Feel free to use them in any way you like.  However, I prefer that you do not alter them too much!

Table of Contents

CEREMONY 1 GENERAL FULLY COMPLETE...............................................................16

READING: 1 Corinthians 13:4-7............................................................................16

VOWS.......................................................................................................................16

RING VOWS............................................................................................................17

CEREMONY 2 GENERAL FULLY COMPLETE...............................................................18

READING.................................................................................................................18

VOWS.......................................................................................................................19

RING VOWS............................................................................................................19

CEREMONY 3 GENERAL FULLY COMPLETE...............................................................20

READING: by Walter Pinder..................................................................................20

RING VOWS............................................................................................................21

CEREMONY 4 GENERAL SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT.........................................................22

VOWS.......................................................................................................................23

RINGS VOWS..........................................................................................................23

CEREMONY 5 GENERAL WITH SAND CEREMONY.......................................................24

VOWS.......................................................................................................................24

RING CEREMONY.................................................................................................25

SAND CEREMONY................................................................................................25

CEREMONY 6 GENERAL WITH VOWS AND CANDLE CEREMONY (SHORT)..................26

RING VOWS............................................................................................................26

CANDLE CEREMONY...........................................................................................26

CEREMONY 7 GENERAL WITH ROSE CEREMONY.......................................................27

PRELIMINARY VOWS..........................................................................................27

VOWS.......................................................................................................................28

RING CEREMONY.................................................................................................28

ROSE CEREMONY (MOTHERS)..........................................................................28

Page i

CEREMONY 8 ROSE CEREMONY ONLY.......................................................................29

ROSE CEREMONY.................................................................................................29

CEREMONY 9 GENERAL INCLUDING CHILDREN (SHORT)...........................................30

CEREMONY 10 GENERAL MODERN ALTERNATIVE....................................................31

CEREMONY 11 GENERAL...........................................................................................33

CEREMONY 12 GENERAL SHORT AND SWEET............................................................34

RING VOWS............................................................................................................34

CEREMONY 13 GENERAL MODERN...........................................................................35

CEREMONY 14 GENERAL MODERN...........................................................................37

CEREMONY 15 GENERAL MODERN...........................................................................38

CEREMONY 16 GENERAL WITH CHILDREN................................................................39

RING VOWS............................................................................................................40

CEREMONY 17 UNITY CANDLE CEREMONY..............................................................40

CEREMONY 18 RELIGIOUS AND GENERAL FULLY COMPLETE...................................41

READING: TWO LIVES........................................................................................41

READING: EPHESIANS 5:25-28 and 31-33.........................................................41

READING: From the Book of RUTH.....................................................................41

RING VOWS............................................................................................................42

READING: 1 Corinthians 13:4-7............................................................................42

CEREMONY 19 RELIGIOUS -UNITY CANDLE AND CHILDREN.....................................43

READING: by Walter Pinder..................................................................................43

RING VOWS............................................................................................................44

READING: LOVE IS THE REASON....................................................................44

UNITY CANDLE CEREMONY.............................................................................44

CEREMONY 20 RELIGIOUS AND CHILDREN................................................................45

READING.................................................................................................................45

VOWS.......................................................................................................................46

RING VOWS............................................................................................................46

CEREMONY 21 RELIGIOUS.........................................................................................47

VOWS.......................................................................................................................49

RING VOWS............................................................................................................50

CEREMONY 22 RELIGIOUS ROSES MOTHERS INCLUDE CHILDREN.............................51

VOWS.......................................................................................................................51

SCRIPTURE READING: 1 Corinthians 13............................................................52

VOWS.......................................................................................................................52

RING VOWS............................................................................................................53

ROSE CEREMONY.................................................................................................53

PRESENTATION OF GUARDIAN ANGELS TO CHILDREN............................53

CEREMONY 23 RELIGIOUS WITH CHILDREN AND ROSE CEREMONY..........................55

UNITY CANDLE.....................................................................................................56

ROSE CEREMONY.................................................................................................56

CEREMONY 24 RELIGIOUS QUAKER..........................................................................57

CEREMONY 25 ALTERNATIVE COMMENCEMENT SPIRITUAL.....................................58

CEREMONY 26 ALTERNATIVE COMMENCEMENT SPIRITUAL.....................................60

CEREMONY 27 ALTERNATIVE COMMENCEMENT SPIRITUAL.....................................61

READING: Colossians 3:12-14...............................................................................61

Page ii

CEREMONY 28 ALTERNATIVE COMMENCEMENT SPIRITUAL.....................................62

CEREMONY 29 ALTERNATIVE COMMENCEMENT SPIRITUAL.....................................63

CEREMONY 30 ALTERNATIVE COMMENCEMENT.......................................................64

CEREMONY 31 ALTERNATIVE COMMENCEMENT.......................................................67

READING: Ecclesiastes 4:9-12...............................................................................68

CEREMONY 32 ALTERNATIVE COMMENCEMENT.......................................................69

CEREMONY 33 ALTERNATIVE...................................................................................69

CEREMONY 34 ALTERNATIVE COMMENCEMENT.......................................................70

CEREMONY 35 RE-AFFIRMATION CEREMONY...........................................................71

CEREMONY 36 CHRISTIAN MEDIEVAL CEREMONY...................................................74

CEREMONY 37 PRAYERBOOK OF EDWARD VI 1537-1553.........................................77

CEREMONY 38: BELL AND INTENT............................................................................80

CEREMONY 39: HAND FASTING AND DECLARATION OF INTENT................................83

CEREMONY 40: PERSONAL CEREMONY.....................................................................86

CEREMONY 41: ROSE CEREMONY.............................................................................88

CEREMONY 42 FULL CHRISTIAN CEREMONY............................................................89

CEREMONY 43 SHORT CHRISTIAN.............................................................................92

VOWS.......................................................................................................................92

CEREMONY 44 UNION OF HEARTS.............................................................................93

CEREMONY 45 THESE ARE THE HANDS......................................................................96

CEREMONY 46...........................................................................................................98

READING.................................................................................................................98

VOWS.......................................................................................................................99

RING VOWS............................................................................................................99

CEREMONY 47 (SAND CEREMONY).........................................................................101

CEREMONY 48 (JEWISH BREAKING OF THE GLASS.).................................................102

HEBREW WEDDING PRAYER...........................................................................102

READING from the Talmut: (Ketubot 8)...............................................................102

SEVEN BENEDICTIONS......................................................................................103

THE SEVEN BLESSINGS "The New Jewish Wedding" By Anita Diamant........103

BREAKING OF THE GLASS...............................................................................104

SECOND VERSION..............................................................................................104

THIRD VERSION..................................................................................................105

FOURTH VERSION..............................................................................................105

CEREMONY 49 (BREAD AND WINE SHARING).........................................................106

BREAD SHARING................................................................................................106

THE WEDDING CAKE.........................................................................................106

THE SHARING OF FOOD AND WINE...............................................................107

WINE SHARING...................................................................................................107

WINE SHARING CEREMONY:...........................................................................108

CEREMONY 50.........................................................................................................109

SQUARE DANCE WEDDING CEREMONY AND VOWS......................................109

VOWS.....................................................................................................................109

READINGS..............................................................................................................................110

READING 1 EVERYDAY YOU LIVE.............................................................................110

READING 2 1 CORINTHIANS 13 (SHORTENED VERSION)..........................................110

READING 3 REMEMBER THE WORD OF KAHLIL GIBRAN:..........................................110

READING 4 MARRIAGE IS LOVE................................................................................111

READING 5 LOVE IS THE REASON..............................................................................111

READING 6 TWO LIVES.............................................................................................111

READING 7 1 CORINTHIANS 13.................................................................................112

READING 8 COLOSSIANS 3:12-14.............................................................................112

READING 9 SONNET 116...........................................................................................113

READING 10 THERE WE ARE ONE..............................................................................113

READING 11 IN LOVE MADE VISIBLE.......................................................................114

READING 12 A VISION.............................................................................................115

READING 13 THE PASSIONATE SHEPHERD TO HIS LOVE..........................................116

READING 14 FROM SONNETS FROM THE PORTUGUESE.............................................116

READING 15 THE IVY CROWN..................................................................................117

READING 16 THE LORD'S PRAYER: TRADITIONAL VERSION.....................................118

READING 17 THE LORDS PRAYER MODERN VERSION..............................................118

READING 18 THE DESIDERATA.................................................................................118

READING 19 BLESSING.............................................................................................119

READING 20 A READING FROM THE NEW TESTAMENT............................................119

READING 21 THE PROPHET (FULLER VERSION).......................................................120

READING 22 MASTER SPEED, ON HIS DAUGHTER'S WEDDING...................................120

READING 23 THE GIFT OF FRIENDSHIP.....................................................................121

READING 24 FROM NOTES TO MYSELF.....................................................................121

READING 25 A TENDER MESSAGE...........................................................................121

READING 26 THE OWL AND THE PUSSY CAT............................................................122

READING 27 WE WILL NOT WISH YOU JOY.............................................................123

READING 28 I AM.....................................................................................................123

READING 29 CARNAL CEREBRAL LOVE...................................................................124

READING 30 ART OF MARRIAGE..............................................................................124

READING 31 A WEDDING TOAST.............................................................................125

READING 32 QUIET THOUGHTS OF THE SEASONS.....................................................125

READING 33 MOST LIKE AN ARCH THIS MARRIAGE................................................126

READING 34 GIVING AND RECEIVING.......................................................................126

READING 35 ANY WIFE OR HUSBAND......................................................................127

READING 36 WHERE THERE IS LOVE........................................................................127

READING 37 IN LOVE FOREVER...............................................................................128

READING 38 LOVE....................................................................................................128

READING 39 LOVE IS ALWAYS..................................................................................129

READING 40 I LOVE YOU.........................................................................................129

READING 41 NOW WE ARE ONE................................................................................130

READING 42 BEST AND MOST IMPORTANT................................................................130

READING 43 LOVE’S PHILOSOPHY............................................................................130

READING 44 A HAPPY COUPLE................................................................................131

READING 45 THIS DAY.............................................................................................131

READING 46 A MARRIAGE BLESSING......................................................................132

READING 47 WHAT IS LOVE?...................................................................................132

READING 48 THE GIFT OF LASTING LOVE................................................................133

Page iv

READING 49 BLESSED ARE WE................................................................................133

READING 50 OUR FRIENDSHIP..................................................................................133

READING 51 TIME AND LOVE...................................................................................134

READING 52 APACHE WEDDING PRAYER.................................................................134

READING 53 COMFORT TOGETHER...........................................................................134

READING 54: BLESSING OF THE APACHES................................................................135

READING 55: CHEROKEE PRAYER............................................................................135

READING 56: WHEN YOU ARE SAD...........................................................................135

READING 57: WE FACE THE FUTURE.........................................................................136

READING 58: FROM SONG OF SONGS........................................................................136

READING 59: BY GEORGE ELIOT..............................................................................136

READING 60: THE BEATLES.....................................................................................136

READING 61: BY KRISHNAMURTI..............................................................................136

READING 62: BY VICTOR HUGO...............................................................................137

READING 63: HEBREW WEDDING PRAYER...............................................................137

READING 64: FROM THE TALMUT: (KETUBOT 8)......................................................137

READING 65: SEVEN BENEDICTIONS........................................................................138

READING 66: SEVEN BLESSINGS NEW JEWISH WEDDING ANITA DIAMANT.............139

VOWS......................................................................................................................................140

VOW 1........................................................................................................................140

VOW 2........................................................................................................................140

VOW 3........................................................................................................................141

VOW 4........................................................................................................................142

VOW 5........................................................................................................................142

VOW 6........................................................................................................................143

VOW 7........................................................................................................................143

VOW 8........................................................................................................................143

VOW 9........................................................................................................................144

VOW 10......................................................................................................................144

VOW 11......................................................................................................................144

VOW 12......................................................................................................................145

VOW 13......................................................................................................................145

VOW 14 (MEDIEVAL)................................................................................................145

VOW 15......................................................................................................................146

VOW 16......................................................................................................................148

VOW 17 (ROSE VOW).................................................................................................149

VOW 18......................................................................................................................150

VOW 19......................................................................................................................151

VOW 20......................................................................................................................151

VOW 21......................................................................................................................152

VOW 22......................................................................................................................152

VOW 23......................................................................................................................153

VOW 24......................................................................................................................154

VOW 25......................................................................................................................154

VOW 26......................................................................................................................155

VOW 27......................................................................................................................155

VOW 28......................................................................................................................156

VOW 29 (EPISCOPAL VOWS)......................................................................................156

VOW 30 (GROOM FROM THE HEART)..........................................................................157

VOW 31 (I LOVE YOU)...............................................................................................158

VOW 32 (FROM THE HEART).......................................................................................159

VOW 33 (I PRAYED TO GOD)......................................................................................159

VOW 34 (I OFFER YOU)..............................................................................................160

VOW 35 (I PRAYED)...................................................................................................160

VOW 36 (MY BELOVED VOW).....................................................................................161

VOW 37 (LONG VOWS)...............................................................................................162

VOW 38 (ROSE VOWS AND RING VOWS)...................................................................163

CHILDRENS VOWS................................................................................................................166

EXAMPLE 1..................................................................................................................166

EXAMPLE 2..................................................................................................................166

EXAMPLE 3..................................................................................................................167

EXAMPLE 4..................................................................................................................167

EXAMPLE 5..................................................................................................................168

EXAMPLE 6..................................................................................................................168

RING VOWS............................................................................................................................169

VOW 1........................................................................................................................169

VOW 2........................................................................................................................169

VOW 3........................................................................................................................170

VOW 4........................................................................................................................170

VOW 5........................................................................................................................170

VOW 6........................................................................................................................171

VOW 7........................................................................................................................171

VOW 8........................................................................................................................171

VOW 9........................................................................................................................172

VOW 10......................................................................................................................172

VOW 11......................................................................................................................172

VOW 12......................................................................................................................172

VOW 13......................................................................................................................172

VOW 14......................................................................................................................173

VOW 15......................................................................................................................173

VOW 16......................................................................................................................173

VOW 17......................................................................................................................173

VOW 18......................................................................................................................173

VOW 19......................................................................................................................174

VOW 20......................................................................................................................174

VOW 21......................................................................................................................174

VOW 22......................................................................................................................174

VOW 23......................................................................................................................174

VOW 24......................................................................................................................174

VOW 25......................................................................................................................175

VOW 26......................................................................................................................175

VOW 27......................................................................................................................175

VOW 28......................................................................................................................175

VOW 29......................................................................................................................175

VOW 30......................................................................................................................175

VOW 31 BLESSING & EXCHANGE OF RINGS...............................................................176

CONCLUSION........................................................................................................................177

Page vii

WEDDING CEREMONIES

CEREMONY 1 General Fully Complete

Who brings this woman to marry this man? (optional)

This is the time which you have chosen to become husband and wife. We are here not only to witness your commitment to each other, but to wish you both every happiness in your future life together.

Within its framework of loyalty and commitment, marriage enables the establishment of a home, where through tolerance, patience and respect, the love and affection which you have for each other may develop into a deep and lasting relationship.

READING: 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is patient and kind, it is never jealous.

Love is never boastful or conceited, it is never rude or

selfish, it does not take offence and is not resentful.

Love takes no pleasure in other peoples faults,

but delights in the truth.

It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope,

it is always ready to endure whatever comes.

True love does not come to an end.

Before you are joined in marriage in my presence and in the presence of these your family, friends and witnesses, I am to remind you of the solemn and firm nature of the relationship into which you both are about to enter.

VOWS

I (Groom’s Name) affirm my love to you (Bride’s Name) as I invite you to share my life. I promise always to respect your needs. I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust to achieve the warm rich life we now look forward to. To this end, I call upon all present to witness that I take you to be my lawful wedded wife.

I (Bride’s Name) affirm my love to you (Groom’s Name) as I invite you to share my life. I promise always to respect your needs. I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust to achieve the warm rich life we now look forward to. To this end, I call upon all present to witness that I take you to be my lawful wedded husband. Page 17

RING VOWS

(Bride’s Name) with this ring, a token and pledge of the vow made between us, I thee wed.

(Groom’s Name) with this ring, a token and pledge of the vow made between us, I thee wed.

As you have consented together in Lawful marriage in the presence of these your family, friends and witnesses and by the giving and receiving of two rings and by the authority vested in me, I now pronounce you to be Husband and Wife. Page 18

CEREMONY 2 General Fully Complete

Who brings this woman to marry this man? (Optional)

Friends, I call upon everyone here present to be a fellow witness with me in the marriage between (Groom’s Name) and (Bride’s Name). We are here to wish them well and every happiness for their future life together.

Marriage is founded upon sincerity and understanding which leads to tolerance, confidence and trust. It involves respect for each other’s feelings and weaknesses and faults. You believe that those qualities, which have attracted you both to each other, can be best spent together.

A happy marriage will enable you to establish a home, with love and stability, where your family and friends will always be welcome and which will be a base from which the influence of your shared and we hope strengthened life today, can extend.

READING

Love one another, but make not a bond of love,

let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of our souls.

Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you

be alone, even as the strings of a lute are alone,

though they quiver with the same music.

Give your hearts, but not into each others keeping,

for only the hand of life can contain your hearts.

Stand together, yet not too near together.

For the pillars of the temple stand apart and the oak

and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.

(Written by KAHLIL GIBRAN)

Before you are joined together in marriage in my presence and in the presence of these your family, friends and witnesses, I am to remind you of the serious and binding nature of the relationship you are now about to enter. Marriage as most of understand it, is a voluntary and full commitment of a man to a woman and a woman to a man. It is made in the deepest sense to the exclusion of all others and is entered into with the desire, hope and firm intention that it will last for life.

At this point of the ceremony I ask if there is anyone who knows of any reason as to why (Groom’s Name) and (Bride’s Name) should not be joined in marriage, and if so, to speak now or forever hold your peace.

(Optional) Page 19

VOWS

I (Groom’s Name) affirm my love to you (Bride’s Name),

as I invite you to share my life.

I promise always to respect your needs.

I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust to achieve

the warm rich lives we now look forward to.

To this end I call upon all present to witness that I take you to be

my lawful wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward,

for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness

and in health while we both shall live.

I (Bride’s Name) affirm my love to you (Groom’s Name),

as I invite you to share my life.

I promise always to respect your needs.

I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust to achieve

the warm rich lives we now look forward to.

To this end I call upon all present to witness that I take you to be

my lawful wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward,

for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health

while we both shall live.

RING VOWS

(Bride’s Name), with this ring I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a

pledge of my love and as a symbol of all we shall share.

(Groom’s Name), with this ring I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a

pledge of my love and as a symbol of all we shall share.

You have declared before all of us that you will live together in marriage.

You have made special promises to each other, which have

been symbolized by the joining of hands, the taking of vows and

the giving and receiving of two rings.

By the authority vested in me, I now pronounce you to be

Husband and Wife.

Now that the ceremony is over and the experience of living day by day

as married people is about to begin, go and meet it gladly, although

before you do it is customary for the Bride and Groom to embrace

and kiss each other.

Presentation of the Bride and Groom to your family and friends. Page 20

CEREMONY 3 General Fully Complete

Who brings this woman to marry this man?

This is the time you have chosen to become husband and wife. We are here, not only to witness your commitment to each other, but also to wish you both every happiness in your future life together.

Within its framework of commitment and loyalty marriage enables the establishment of a home, where through trust, patience and respect, the love and affection which you have for each other may develop into a deep and lasting relationship.

We who are witnessing your marriage, hope that despite the stresses inevitable in any life your Love, Respect for each other, your trust and understanding of each other will increase your contentment and heighten your joy in living.

READING: by Walter Pinder

Everyday you live, learn how to receive love with as much understanding as you give it.

Find things within yourself, then you can share them with each other. Do not fear this love. Have an open heart and a sincere mind. Be sincerely interested in each other’s happiness. Be constant and consistent in your love. From this comes security and strength. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us on this day of your marriage. Try to commit yourselves fully and freely to each other.

Before you are joined in marriage in my presence and the presence of these your family, friends and witnesses, I am to remind you of the serious and binding nature of the relationship you are now about to enter.

Minister I shall now ask you to make your marriage vows.

Minister: (Groom’s Name) will you take (Bride’s Name) to be your lawful wife, will you love her, honor and keep her in sickness and in health and forsaking all others keep only unto her so long as you both shall live.

Response: I will.

Minister: (Bride’s Name) will you take (Groom’s Name) to be your lawful husband, will you love him, honor and keep him in sickness and in health and forsaking all others keep only unto him so long as you both shall live.

Response: I will. Page 21

RING VOWS

Groom: (Bride’s Name), with this ring, I thee wed.

Bride: (Groom’s Name), with this ring, I thee wed.

Minister: You have consented together to be bound to one another in lawful marriage. You have made special promises to each other which have been symbolized by the joining of hands, taking of vows and by the giving and receiving of rings.

By the authority vested in me, according to the laws of (Wherever), I now pronounce you to be husband and wife. Now that the ceremony is over and the experience of living day by day is about to begin, go and meet it gladly.

Embrace of Couple. Page 22

CEREMONY 4 General Slightly Different

Welcome to all friends and family on this beautiful and joyful day, (Bride’s and Groom’s Name) have asked me to extend a very warm welcome to you on this their wedding day.

Friends, I call upon everyone here to be a fellow witness with me in the marriage of (Bride’s and Groom’s Names). We are here to celebrate with them, and wish them every happiness for their future life together.

Many of us would easily describe (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) as being tender and loving. Yet on this occasion they are also being both brave and daring.

As Lord Byron once said,

"The bravest are the tenderest and the loving are the daring".

They dare to give truly of themselves, and do so with confidence that they will better who they are as individuals, as a husband, as a wife, and God-willing as parents. As it has been said, Marriage is not a union merely between two individuals -- it is a union between two souls and the intention of that bond is to perfect the nature of both.

To better express their thoughts on this day, (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) have selected the following readings:

READING: inserted from Reading Section.

A good marriage is founded on respect, trust, love and confidence. We believe that those qualities, which have attracted you both to each other, can be best developed during a life spent together.

Before you are joined together in marriage in my presence and in the presence of these your family and witnesses, we wish to acknowledge that you both come to this ceremony as complete individuals, who bearing free and unconstrained souls understand the profoundness of this lifetime commitment.

At this stage of the ceremony I ask if there be anyone who knows of any reason as to why (Names of Bride and Groom) should not be joined in marriage. Speak now or forever hold your peace. Page 23

VOWS

Minister: I shall now ask you to make your marriage vows to each other

Minister: Do you (Groom’s Name), take (Bride’s Name) to be your lawful wedded wife, to have and to hold, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others so long as you both shall live?

(Groom): I do

Minister: Do you (Bride’s Name), take (Groom’s Name) to be your lawful wedded husband, to have and to hold, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others so long as you both shall live?

(Bride): I do

RINGS VOWS

(Groom’s Name), repeat after me: "With this ring, I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a symbol of my unending love for you"

(Bride’s Name), repeat after me: "With this ring, I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a symbol of my unending love for you"

Now you have consented together in lawful marriage in the presence of your family, friends and witnesses. You have made special promises to each other, which have been symbolized by the joining of hands, taking of vows and the giving and receiving of two rings.

By the authority vested in me as a Minister in the State of Wherever, I now pronounce you to be husband and wife.

(Groom’s Name), you many now kiss the bride.

Now that the ceremony is over we wish you every happiness in your life together, go and meet it gladly.

Friends, it is now my great pleasure to introduce to you, the very happy couple (Names of couple). "May joy and fresh days of love accompany your hearts". Page 24

CEREMONY 5 General with Sand Ceremony

Who brings this woman to marry this man?

Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created. In the art of marriage, the little things are the big things.

It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say, “I love you”. It is at no time taking the other for granted. It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives; it is standing together facing the world. It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. It is not expecting perfection in each other. It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding, and a sense of humor. It is having a capacity to forgive and forget. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, the dependence is mutual, and the obligation is reciprocal. It is a common search for the good and the beautiful. It is not marrying the right partner; it is being the right partner. It is discovering that your love for one another at its best will never lose sight of or be blotted out by the common place experiences of life.

And it is remembering that remaining devoted, confident and hopeful in one another are the secret ingredients, which will help you to remain two very happy people, richer for your oneness.

(Groom’s Name), will you take (Bride’s Name) to be your wife, will you continue to be loving and caring, to comfort her, to protect your love for her, cherishing her, honoring and respecting her and your promises to her throughout all the events of your lives together?

(Bride’s Name), will you take (Groom’s Name) to be your husband, will you continue to be loving and caring, to comfort him, to protect your love for him, cherishing him, honoring and respecting him and your promises to him throughout all the events of your lives together?

VOWS

Today I give myself to you and ask for your tomorrows. I promise to love you more than anyone else can; to give you my strength and ask for yours in return; to help you in good times and in bad. I give you all my trust and ask you to accept me as your husband.

Today I give myself to you and ask for your tomorrows. I promise to love you more than anyone else can; to give you my strength and ask for yours in return; to help you in good times and in bad. I give you all my trust and ask you to accept me as your wife. Page 25

RING CEREMONY

(Groom’s Name), take this ring as a symbol of my devotion to you, of the gift of love that has come to us and my desire to live my life with you.

(Bride’s Name), take this ring as a symbol of my devotion to you, of the gift of love that has come to us and my desire to live my life with you.

SAND CEREMONY

This sand is symbolic of two people as two separate people in their own right. By the joining of these two colors of sand into one, this symbolizes the strength and unity of two into one, depicting, (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) belief that together they can become greater than each could alone.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names), you have expressed your love to one another by the giving of a commitment and the promises you have just made. So it is with these in mind and by the authority given to me I pronounce that you are husband and wife.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names), you may seal your promises with a kiss.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names), never forget the beginning of your love for one another, take care of it, nurture it, and allow it to grow strong and firm in the years that are to come. Always concentrate on making each other feel happy and secure in your commitment to one another. Always rely on your ability to keep the promises you have made to one another today and always love one another.

Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you Mr. and Mrs. (Names) Page 26

CEREMONY 6 General with Vows and Candle Ceremony (Short)

This is a short ceremony that a couple requested with only the Ring Vows and a Candle Ceremony.

RING VOWS

(Bride’s Name) with this ring I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a symbol of all we shall share.

(Groom’s Name) with this ring I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a symbol of all we shall share.

CANDLE CEREMONY

Minister: These two candles are symbolic of two people as two separate people in there own right. By the joining of two candles into one, this symbolizes the strength and the unity of two into one. Depicting (Bride’s and Groom’s Names)’s belief that together they can become greater than each could alone. The side candles remain burning to further symbolize the continuing importance of the individual integrity within the marriage relationship.

Minister: You (Couples Names) have declared before all of us that you will live together in marriage. You have made special promises to each other, which have been symbolized by the joining of hands, taking of vows and the giving and receiving of two rings, and the lighting of the candle, representing strength and unity.

I now pronounce you to be husband and wife. Now that the ceremony is over and the experience of living day by day is about to begin, go and meet it gladly. Page 27

CEREMONY 7 General with Rose Ceremony

Who brings this woman to marry this man?

Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens.

A good marriage must be created. In the art of marriage,

the little things are the big things…

It is never being too old to hold hands.

It is remembering to say, “I love you.”

It is at no time taking the other for granted.

It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives;

it is standing together facing the world.

It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice,

but in the spirit of joy.

It is not expecting perfection in each other.

It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding, and a sense of humor.

It is having a capacity to forgive and forget.

It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal,

the dependence is mutual, and the obligation is reciprocal.

It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

It is not marrying the right partner; it is being the right partner.

It is discovering that your love for one another at its best will never lose

sight of or be blotted out by the common place experiences of life.

And it is remembering that remaining devoted, confident and hopeful in

one another are the secret ingredients, which will help you to

remain two very happy people, richer for your oneness.

PRELIMINARY VOWS

(Groom’s Name), will you take (Bride’s Name) to be your wife, will you continue to be loving and caring, to comfort her, to protect your love for her, cherishing her, honoring and respecting her and your promises to her throughout all the events of your lives together?

(Bride’s Name), will you take (Groom’s Name) to be your husband, will you continue to be loving and caring, to comfort him, to protect your love for him, cherishing him, honoring and respecting him and your promises to him throughout all the events of your lives together? Page 28

VOWS

Today I give myself to you and ask for your tomorrows. I promise to love you more than anyone else can; to give you my strength and ask for yours in return; to help you in good times and in bad. I give you all my trust and ask you to accept me as your husband.

Today I give myself to you and ask for your tomorrows. I promise to love you more than anyone else can; to give you my strength and ask for yours in return; to help you in good times and in bad. I give you all my trust and ask you to accept me as your wife.

RING CEREMONY

(Bride’s Name), take this ring as a symbol of my devotion to you, of the gift of love that has come to us and my desire to live my life with you.

(Groom’s Name), take this ring as a symbol of my devotion to you, of the gift of love that has come to us and my desire to live my life with you.

PRONOUNCEMENT

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names), you have expressed your love to one another by the giving of a commitment and the promises you have just made. So it is with these in mind and by the authority given to me, I pronounce that you are husband and wife.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names), you may seal your promises with a kiss.

ROSE CEREMONY (MOTHERS)

Marriage is a coming together of two lives, and a celebration of the love of two people. But it is more. The love that (Bride's and Groom's Names) feel for one another is the flowering of a seed their parents planted in their hearts years ago. As they embrace one another in their love, so do they embrace the families, which have been brought together on this happy occasion. As a token of their love for their families, (Bride's and Groom's Names) would like to offer these symbols of eternal love, these roses, to their mothers.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names), never forget the beginning of your love for one another, take care of it, nurture it, and allow it to grow strong and firm in the years that are to come. Always concentrate on making each other feel happy and secure in your commitment to one another. Always rely on your ability to keep the promises you have made to one another today and always love one another.

Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you Mr. and Mrs. (Name). Page 29

CEREMONY 8 Rose Ceremony only

ROSE CEREMONY

Like a journey along a road, marriage has its ups and downs, its rough thorny parts and its smooth parts.

These roses have a similar message, as you examine the branch it can be seen that the outer part is smooth and shiny and that at irregular intervals, a spike or a bump appears. As we travel along the smooth surface and circumnavigate the bumps we arrive at the beautiful petals of the rose which reminds us all of the beauty, the elegance of life. (Bride and Grooms Names) as you now travel along your journey of marriage and love for each other, I ask you to remember the message of the rose. (Bride and Grooms Names) I offer you each a rose as a symbol of the journey you begin today.

(Minister gives a rose to Bride and Groom)

Give each other a rose at very regular intervals in your future life, so as to remind you and each other that the journey is truly worth it. At the end, the glory, the beauty and the elegance is well worth the bumps and the spikes along the way.

As a token of your journey and to fully experience the excitement and the spirit of giving each other a rose, I now offer you this opportunity.

(Bride and Groom, offer the roses to each other) Page 30

CEREMONY 9 General including Children (Short)

Welcome and thank you all for coming to the event and marriage of the year.

As you all know (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), are very special people with fantastic individual special tastes. This ceremony is going to be no different, it will be sincere, just as their love for each other is also sincere.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) have been together now for a few years and had exciting times together. They have also experienced family life and today this is more than just a wedding ceremony, this is also a joining together of (Bride's and Groom's Names) and (Children’s Names), as a family.

When one looks at this family one sees the energy and the love for each and everyone. So I ask (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) to join hands and exchange their vows between each other.

(Groom’s Name) will you take (Bride’s Name) as your wife, will you continue to love her and only her? The love you have is special and the love you have for (Children’s Name’s) is also special. Will you take (Bride’s Name) and promise to care for her as your own?

Will you promise also to bring breakfast in bed to (Bride’s Name) as often as you can? Response: I WILL.

(Bride’s Name) will you take (Groom’s Name) as your Husband, will you continue to love him and only him? The love you have is special and the love you have for (Children’s Name’s) is also special.

Will you promise also to bring breakfast in bed to (Groom’s Name) as often as you can? Response: I WILL.

I now declare you married and announce you as man & wife. Page 31

CEREMONY 10 General Modern Alternative

Welcome to you all gathered here today for (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), wedding.

It was the great medieval philosopher, Thomas Aquinas, who, when asked to define true love, said that it was "To will the good of the other person". If you truly love someone you want their success, their happiness, everything that is best for them. In the history of mankind, great lovers have died for the one or the ones they love.

Nothing like that is called for here but (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) do want you to know why they are getting married today. They could have chosen simply to live together. This unquestionably is a "safer" course, would seemingly give them more options, seemingly sustain their freedom, and have less risks attached. They have thought about this and have decided that for them it is not enough.

They see this ceremony today as a stronger commitment to their relationship. They call you together, their friends and family, to make this commitment clear to you and to call on your acknowledgement and support. They publicly call on each other to take the relationship more seriously.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) recognize that they are very happy with one another. They recognize that they would not be happier with anyone else that no distant fields are greener.

There is another element in all this. They love each other. With the philosopher, they will each other's good. They will each other's success, fulfillment and happiness.

They know the main danger in a marriage relationship is the danger of taking each other for granted, of not appreciating each other enough.

So they want to stay aware of each other. They know they must communicate with each other and be open to communication. This, they know, is a lot harder than it sounds. Words must be said softly, listened to carefully.

Their relationship must be sustained by the will to express it, the loving word, the loving smile, the loving embrace, the loving favor, the giving with graciousness and generosity. They know not to take without giving, give without taking. A true lover knows what the demands of love sometimes cost the partner so they will to be sensitive, to be appreciative. And they remind themselves today that they must do these things without dominating, without smothering, without suffocating the other. Page 32

They have assessed happily that their relationship is for life. They have found each other, they like each other, they love each other, they want it to last, they intend it to last, they will it to last.

More than that, they will it to get better, they will it to get deeper. They want to be husband and wife. They want people to look at them and quote, as it were, the poet, Homer, who said 800 years before Christ:

"There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife confounding their enemies and delighting their friends."

VOWS: inserted here from Vows Section

It is with pleasure that I pronounce the joining together in Holy Matrimony of (Mr. and Mrs. Name).

Embrace and congratulations by guests. Page 33

CEREMONY 11 General

We have come here together today to celebrate the marriage and reflect the incredible joy of (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), who after several dress rehearsals and detours (or, after almost overwhelming losses), long after they believed that it was possible, have been given the great good fortune of falling in love with one another.

A wedding is the celebration of the miracle of love, and that's what we're here to do: to celebrate that miracles do occur all of the time, that at any moment, the unexpected can happen and often does. That after almost giving up hope, most inexplicably and wonderfully, the path of our entire lives can change.

Marriage is a meditation on our histories as well as on our future, on our losses and failures, as well as our hopes and possibilities. So, as (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) marry each other, it is worthwhile to contemplate that they could not and would not be standing before us today if they had not followed their own shining star home, and done what they intended to do and to deliver themselves to this point in their lives.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) you give us hope, and we are overjoyed to be your witnesses. You are the living embodiment of the truth that practice does indeed make perfect, that persistence does, in fact pay off. We are touched by your happiness; we are moved by the exquisite courage of your love for each other. It gives us incomparable joy to celebrate with you, to be reminded that true love, abiding love, is the consequence of the practice of love, and that nothing we do in this life is ever wasted or for that matter is forever lost entirely.

READING: inserted from the Reading Section.

VOWS: inserted from the Vows Section.

Today we are deeply honored to be present when (Bride’s and Groom’s Name) are joined together. Most of you here are aware of the trials and tribulations that they have indeed gone through just to get this far. They also are aware that they have further to go on this journey and are fully prepared for that and ask that you join them in spirit, so that they will have also your strength.

PRAYERS

Thank you everybody. Both (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) acknowledge your presence and thank you. Ladies and Gentlemen I take great pride and privilege in announcing to you and the world the union in marriage of Mr. and Mrs. (Name).

Kiss and embrace of the couple. Page 34

CEREMONY 12 General Short and Sweet

The civil ceremony is the simplest, most immediate and direct of all the wedding ceremonies. It is usually attended only by the Bride, the Groom, and any legally required witnesses. It includes a brief introduction, the vows, and the announcement. If you would like a short ceremony then here it is.

Minister or Officiant: We have come together to unite the two of you in marriage, which is an institution ordained by the state and made honorable by the faithful keeping of good men and women in all ages, and is not to be entered into lightly or unadvisedly.

Then, the Officiant or Minister turns to the Groom and says:

Do you (Groom’s Name) take (Bride’s Name) to be your wife, to love, honor, comfort, and cherish from this day forth?

Answer: I do.

Then, turning to the Bride:

Do you (Bride’s Name) take (Groom’s Name) to be your husband, to love, honor, comfort and cherish from this day forth?

Answer: I do.

RING VOWS

(Bride’s Name), with this ring I thee wed.

(Groom’s Name), with this ring I thee wed.

Minister: Having pledged yourselves each to the other, I do now, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the state of (Wherever), pronounce you to be husband and wife.

You may now seal this your marriage by kissing each other. Page 35

CEREMONY 13 General Modern

Real love in marriage is something beyond the warmth and the excitement and romance of being deeply in love. It is as much about the welfare and happiness of your marriage partner as about your own. But real love is not being absorbed in each other. Love makes burdens lighter because you divide them, it makes joys more intense because you share them. It makes you stronger so you can reach out and become involved with life in ways you dared not risk alone.

The beautiful thing about love is that it's an experience we share with the whole of mankind throughout the world. And yet, to everyone who falls in love, it is the most unique, precious thing in the world. A really happy marriage is founded on love. There is nothing in life that love cannot change. Love is, of its nature, unselfish, understanding and kind. True love, too, is a commitment of heart and mind. There can be no stronger bond to ensure a happy married life.

Harmonious wedded life is a precious gain to both man and woman because, even though marriage increases the scope of responsibility, it adds the dimension of love to life, giving it new meaning and purpose.

On this day, (Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name) the day of your marriage, you are standing somewhat apart from the rest of us as a symbol of the open expression of your love. This is as it should be, but love is not meant to be the possession of two people alone. Rather it should be the source of a common energy, which gives you the strength to live your lives with joy, happiness and with courage.

READING: to be inserted from Reading Section.

Giving Away of Bride, this can be Father or any other person:

In ancient times it was the custom for a young woman to be under the authority and protection of the man who was the head of the family this was usually her father or elder brother. When she became married this responsibility and the authority passed to her husband. This was the origin of the "Giving Away" ceremony. Times have changed, and so indeed have women, but we still remember this as an ancient custom. Nowadays however, we like to make it the occasion when the families and friends of the bride show their approval of the marriage. Since you are all here, we may take it that this is token enough, and invite (Persons Name who is giving the Bride away) to speak on behalf of all present. Page 36

Who, then, on behalf of all of us, presents this woman to be married to this man?

(Person replies) "I do".

PERSONAL VOWS: inserted here from Vows section.

RING VOWS: inserted here from Ring Vows section.

READINGS: Insert another Reading if desired.

Ladies and Gentlemen, you have today witnessed and seen (Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name) declare before you all gathered here. They have made very special promises to each other and also to you all. They have also symbolized it by the joining of hands, taking of vows and by the exchange of rings. So therefore on behalf of them and on your behalf I now formally declare them to be husband and wife.

Embrace of Bride and Groom. Page 37

CEREMONY 14 General Modern

Friends, I call upon everyone here present to be a fellow witness with me in this marriage between (Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name). We are here, not only to witness their commitment to each other, but also to wish them well and every happiness for their life together.

(Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name) believe marriage is founded on that sort of sincerity and understanding, which leads to tolerance, confidence and trust. They feel it involves respect for each other's individuality and that most difficult of tasks, the acceptance of each other's weaknesses, prejudices and faults. They believe too that those qualities, which have attracted each to the other and brought them here today, can obviously be best developed during a life spent together. A happy marriage, they both know, will enable them to establish a home where there will be love and stability, where you, their family and also their friends will find welcome, peace, harmony and support, and which will be a base from which the influence of their shared, and we hope strengthened life today by this wedding ceremony, can extend.

READING: Insert your Reading from the Reading section.

Now I, (Minister’s Name) am duly authorized by the law of this country to solemnize this, your marriage, and before you, (Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name) are joined together in marriage in my presence and in the presence of these, your family and friends, I am bound, to remind you publicly of the solemn, the serious and the binding nature of the relationship into which you both are now about to enter.

Marriage, as most of us understand it is the voluntary and full commitment of a man to a woman and a woman to a man; it is made in the deepest sense to the exclusion of all others, and is entered into with the desire, the hope and the firm intention that it will last for life.

VOWS: Insert your Vows from the Vows section.

RING VOWS: Insert your Ring Vows from the Ring section.

Today (Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name) you have both declared to each other allegiance in the form of a wedding ceremony. You have said vows to each other, and also exchanged rings as a form of a pledge and also as a reminder, to yourself and to others that you are now married to each other. Therefore it now remains that you seal this with an embrace and a kiss.

Announce the (Bride and Groom) as Mr and Mrs, generally the Groom’s last name but it does not have to be that way, as the Bride may like to keep her previous last name. Page 38

CEREMONY 15 General Modern

Who brings this woman to marry this man?

Response from person giving Bride away is, I do.

Every wedding ceremony at which a clergyman, a rabbi or a celebrant, like myself, officiates is of course, of a marriage which already exists. This ceremony gives social recognition to a union which has already taken place in the hearts of the couple present. It is (Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name) wish at this time to declare their marriage partnership to the world. It is a statement of commitment to each other and to ideals they already have.

In their belief their union is based not only on mutual love, but on the desire to work together for the development of a union of spirit, for their own personal fulfillment and for the attainment of mutual goals and ambitions. Together they hope to discover truth in life. They intend to encourage each other to act according to what is best for their world, their children and themselves.

(Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name) recognize not only the need for loving com-mitment to each other but also to humane principles of living and to the best of human values. This they will adhere to as best as they are able and they also ask that all of you gathered here today assist them.

READING: inserted from Reading section.

Before (Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name) say their Wedding Vows to each other and also to you all gathered here today, I am also to remind them that these vows are meaningful and have a serious message and are not to be taken lightly. These vows are not to be taken lightly and I ask you all at this moment to pause and reflect upon the seriousness of the vows that you are now about to hear. (Pause for a few moments, in silence.)

PERSONAL VOW: inserted from Vows section.

RING VOW: inserted from Ring Vows section.

You have all been a witness today and you were all invited to this very special occasion when (Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name) shared before you all gathered here, their love and dedication to each other. Not only their Love and dedication but much more that that, they have sealed their love with vows and exchanged two rings as a sign and symbol to the world that they are now married. I take pride and privilege in announcing to all Mr. and Mrs. (Name).

Embrace and kiss of the couple. Page 39

CEREMONY 16 General with Children

Friends I call upon everyone here present to be a fellow witness with me in the marriage of (Groom’s and Bride’s Names). We are here to wish them well and every happiness for their future life together.

Marriage is founded upon sincerity and understanding which leads to tolerance, confidence and trust. It involves respect for each other’s feelings and weaknesses and faults. You believe that those qualities, which have attracted you both to each other, can be best developed during a life spent together.

A happy marriage will enable you to establish a home with love and stability, where your family and friends will always be welcome and which will be a base from which the influence of your shared, and we hope strengthened life today, can extend.

READING: insert one from Readings Section.

Before you are joined together in marriage in my presence and in the presence of these your family, friends and your children. I remind you of the seriousness of marriage.

Marriage is a voluntary and a full commitment of a man to a woman and a woman to a man. It is made in the deepest sense to the exclusion of all others and is entered into with the desire, hope and the firm intention that it will last for life.

Minister: I shall now ask you to take your vows.

Groom: I (Groom’s Name) affirm my love for you (Bride’s Name) as I invite you to share my life. I promise always to respect your needs. I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust to achieve the warm rich life we now look forward to. To this end I call upon all present to witness that I take you (Bride’s Name) to be my lawful wife.

Bride: I (Bride’s Name) affirm my love to you (Groom’s Name), as I invite you to share my life. I promise always to respect your needs. I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust to achieve the warm rich life we now look forward to. To this end I call upon all present to witness that I take you (Groom’s Name) to be my lawful husband. Page 40

RING VOWS

(Bride’s Name), with this ring, a token and pledge of the vow made between us I thee wed

(Groom’s Name), with this ring, a token and pledge of the vow made between us I thee wed.

When two people are joined together it is more than just a marriage between two it is also a blending together of children. In (Groom’s and Bride’s Names) marriage today this is also the case and I ask now for the three young men to join us, (Names of Children).

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) you have declared before all of us that you will live together in marriage. You have made special promises to each other which have been symbolized by the joining of hands, taking of vows and the giving and receiving of a two rings. As you have now become joined and united you will now go forth into the world as a family.

By the authority vested in me as a Minister of the State of Wherever, I now pronounce you to be husband and wife.

Now that the ceremony is over and the experience of living day by day is about to begin, go and meet it gladly.

Embrace and introduction of Mr. and Mrs. (Name).

CEREMONY 17 Unity Candle Ceremony

These two candles are symbolic of two people, as two separate people in their own right. By the joining of two candles into one, this symbolizes the strength and unity of two into one, depicting, (Groom’s Name) and (Bride’s Name) belief that together they can become greater than each could alone. Page 41

CEREMONY 18 Religious and General Fully Complete

Who brings this woman to marry this man?

This is the time that you have chosen to become husband and wife. We are here not only to witness your commitment to each other, but to wish you every happiness in your future life together. Marriage is founded on sincerity and understanding, which leads to tolerance, confidence and trust. We believe that those qualities, which have attracted you both to each other, can be best developed during a life spent together. A happy marriage will enable you to establish a home with love and stability where your family and friends will always be welcome.

READING: TWO LIVES

Two lives, two people, so very different, yet so similar.

Together we stand as one, sharing our future as it comes.

The past is that, past.

Buds are yet to blossom, with care and trust, the best is yet to be revealed.

Honesty and kindness, are the fruits of love.

Lord bless this day and always to enrich us so our love will never end.

Before you are joined together in marriage in my presence and in the presence of these your family and witnesses, I am bound to remind you of the solemn and firm nature of the relationship into which you are about to enter. Marriage as most of us understand it, is the voluntary commitment of a man to a woman and a woman to a man to the exclusion of all others and is entered into with the desire, the hope and the firm intention that it will last for life.

READING: EPHESIANS 5:25-28 and 31-33

Husbands, love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall be joined unto his wife and they two shall be one flesh. However each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself and the wife respect her husband.

READING: From the Book of RUTH

And Ruth said, “Entreat me not to leave you or to return from following you; for where you go I will go and where you lodge I will lodge; your people shall be my people and your God my God; where you die I will die and there will I be buried. May the lord do so to me and more also if even death parts me from you.

Minister: We shall now say your vows. Page 42

Groom: I (Groom’s Name) affirm my love to you (Bride’s Name) as I invite you to share my life. I promise always to respect your needs. I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust to achieve the warm rich life we now look forward to. To this end I call upon all present to witness that I take you (Bride’s Name) to be my lawful wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health while we both shall live.

Bride: I Bride’s Name) affirm my love to you (Groom’s Name), as I invite you to share my life. I promise always to respect your needs. I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust to achieve the warm rich life we now look forward to. To this end I call upon all present to witness that I take you (Groom’s Name) to be my lawful husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health while we both shall live.

RING VOWS

(Bride’s Name); with this ring I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a symbol of all we shall share.

(Groom’s Name); with this ring I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a symbol of all we shall share.

READING: 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous.

Love is never boastful or conceited, it is never rude or selfish, it does not take offense and is not resentful.

Love takes no pleasure in other people’s faults, but delights in the truth.

It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope. It is always ready to endure whatever comes. True love does not come to an end.

Minister: You have declared before all of us that you will live together in marriage. You have made special promises to each other, which have been symbolized by the joining of hands, taking of vows and the giving and receiving of two rings.

By the authority vested in me as a Minister in the State of Wherever, I now pronounce you to be husband and wife. Now that the ceremony is over and the experience of living day by day is about to begin, go and meet it gladly.

Embrace each other.

Introduce Mr. and Mrs. (Name) Page 43

CEREMONY 19 Religious -Unity Candle and Children

Who brings this woman to marry this man?

Friends, I call upon everyone here present to be a fellow witness with me in the marriage of (Groom’s Name and Bride’s Name). We are here to wish them well and every happiness in their future life together.

Marriage is founded on sincerity and understanding, which leads to tolerance, confidence and trust. You believe that those qualities, which have attracted you both to each other, can be best developed during a life spent together. A happy marriage will enable you to establish a home with love and stability where your family and friends will always be welcome and which will be a base from which the influence of your shared and we hope strengthened life can extend.

READING: by Walter Pinder

Everyday you live, learn how to receive love with as much understanding as you give it.

Find things within yourself, that you can share them with each other. Do not fear this love. Have an open heart and a sincere mind. Be sincerely interested in each other’s happiness. Be constant and consistent in your love. From this comes security and strength. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us on this day of your marriage. Try to commit yourselves fully and freely to each other.

Before you are joined together in marriage in my presence and in the presence of these your family and witnesses, I am bound to remind you of the relationship into which you are about to enter. Marriage as most of us understand it, is the voluntary commitment of a man to a woman and a woman to a man to the exclusion of all others and is entered into with the desire, the hope and the firm intention that it will last for life.

Minister: We shall now say your vows.

Groom: (Bride’s Name) you have filled my world with meaning. You have made me so happy and more fulfilled as a person. Thank you for taking me as I am, loving me and welcoming me into your heart. I promise to always love you, respect you as an individual and to be faithful to you forever. I choose you as my wife today and commit myself to you for the rest of our lives.

Bride: (Groom’s Name) you have filled my world with meaning. You have made me so happy and more fulfilled as a person. Thank you for taking me as I am, loving me and welcoming me into your heart. I promise to always love you, respect you as an individual and to be faithful to you forever. I choose you as my husband today and commit myself to you for the rest of our lives. Page 44

RING VOWS

(Bride’s Name); with this ring I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a pledge of my love and as a symbol of all we shall share.

(Groom’s Name); with this ring I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a pledge of my love and as a symbol of all we shall share.

READING: LOVE IS THE REASON

Love is the reason why this day was chosen by you both to begin your lives together and love is the reason why you both will give with all your hearts for the good of each other. Love is the reason that together you will become one; one in hope; one in believing in life; one in sharing the coming years.

UNITY CANDLE CEREMONY

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) light the candles which represent love for each other and for (Child’s Name). From the uniqueness of these separate flames, they kindle a larger and brighter flame which represents the union between (Groom’s, Bride’s and Child’s Names). The side candles remain burning to symbolize the continuing importance of the individual integrity within the marriage relationship. The greater height of the center candle depicts their belief that together they can become more than either could alone.

Minister: You have declared before all of us that you will live together in marriage. You have made special promises to each other which have been symbolized by the taking of vows and by the giving and receiving of two ring’s.

By the authority vested in me, as a Minister in the State of Wherever, I now pronounce you to be husband and wife and more than that as (Groom’s, Bride’s and Child’s Names) are now joined together and they have become a united family.

Now that the ceremony is over and the experience of living day by day is about to begin, go and meet it gladly.

Introduce Mr. and Mrs. (Name) Page 45

CEREMONY 20 Religious and Children

Who brings this woman to marry this man?

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names), this is the time you have chosen to become husband and wife and to form a family, complete with (Children’s Names). We are here, not only to witness your commitment to each other, but also to wish you both every happiness in your future life together.

Within its framework of commitment and loyalty, marriage enables the establishment of a home, where through tolerance, patience and respect, the love and affection which you have for each other may develop into a deep and lasting relationship.

We who are witnessing your marriage, hope that despite the stresses inevitable in any life, your love and respect for each other, your trust and understanding of each other will increase your contentment and heighten your joy in living.

For their wedding, (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) have chosen the following reading:

READING

Two lives, two people, so very different, yet so similar.

Together we stand as one, sharing our future as it comes.

The past is that – past.

Buds are yet to blossom, with care and trust, the best to be revealed.

Honesty and kindness, are the fruits of love.

Lord bless this day and always, to enrich us so our love will never end.

Before you are joined in marriage in the presence of God and these your family, friends and witnesses, I am to remind you of the solemn and firm nature of the relationship into which you both now are about to enter. Page 46

VOWS

(Groom’s Name), please repeat after me (Bride’s Name), I affirm my love for you as I invite you to share my life. I promise always to respect your needs. I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust, to achieve the warm, rich life we now look forward to. To this end, I call upon all present to witness that I take you to be my lawful wedded wife.

(Bride’s Name), please repeat after me (Groom’s Name) I affirm my love for you as I invite you to share my life. I promise always to respect your needs. I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust, to achieve the warm, rich life we now look forward to. To this end, I call upon all present to witness that I take you to be my lawful wedded husband.

RING VOWS

(Bride’s Name), with this ring, a token and pledge of the vow made between us, I thee wed.

(Groom’s Name), with this ring, a token and pledge of the vow made between us, I thee wed.

As you have consented together in lawful marriage in the presence of God and these, your family, friends and witnesses and by the giving and receiving of rings and by the authority vested in me, I now pronounce you to be husband and wife. Ladies and Gentlemen it is my great pleasure to introduce to you, Mr. and Mrs. (Name) and Children’s names. Page 47

CEREMONY 21 Religious

Minister: Dear family and friends, I call upon all of you gathered here to be fellow witnesses with me in the marriage of (Bride’s and Groom’s Names). You were each invited to join us today so that you may share in the joy that (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) are feeling as they pledge their love and commitment to each other.

The decision to marry is based in love and founded upon sincerity and understanding, which leads to a relationship that is rich in confidence and trust.

A strong marriage is dependent upon many factors. Beyond the love, respect and trust that you share with one another, there must be a strong sense of commitment and loyalty that bonds you. A shared faith and beliefs in God, and His grace in your lives, is important in building a strong marriage. And also important are a shared companionship and a willingness to communicate openly with one another. This respectful communication and the love that it displays, helps each partner to accept and understand the other’s strengths and weaknesses and allow for the continued growth that is necessary in all good and lasting marriages.

In the Bible, Paul wrote beautifully about the power of love in his 1st book of letters to the Corinthians, Chapter 13.

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.

And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

If I give away all I have, and if I deliver my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends; as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For our knowledge is imperfect and our prophecy is imperfect; but when the perfect comes, the imperfect will pass away. Page 48

When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall understand fully, even as I have been fully understood.

So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names), before you are joined together in matrimony here today, in my presence and in the presence of your family and friends, I am to remind you of the serious and binding nature of the relationship of marriage.

The commitment of marriage is one of the most important commitments that two people will make in their lifetime. Marriage, as most of us understand it, is a voluntary and full commitment of a man to a woman and a woman to a man. It is made in the deepest sense, to the exclusion of all others, and is intended to last a lifetime. The vow of marriage is a pledge of everlasting love, within the unity of matrimony, whereby, committing to share all that life has to offer, the good times and the bad, with patience and understanding. For a marriage to remain strong, your faith in that vow must never waver. It must remain strong through the trials of everyday life. The words that you speak to each other today are to be the cornerstone for your life together from this day forward.

Minister: (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), have you come here freely and without reservation to give yourselves to each other in marriage?

(Bride and Groom) We have!

Minister: Will you love and honor each other as husband and wife for the rest of your lives?

(Bride and Groom) We will!

Minister: Let us say a short prayer:

God who has created us, each as an individual, open (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) hearts to feel your guidance and support through those who have gathered with them here today. Let their marriage be an occasion for them to see how you have been working in their lives separately, and together. May they remember the vows taken here today, not only in their minds, but also, in their everyday actions of kindness and caring for one another, Amen Page 49

VOWS

Groom: (Bride’s Name), in affirmation of my love for you, I invite you to join your life with mine from this day forward. I will respect you and cherish you always. I promise to share with you all that life has to offer. I give myself to you, in kindness, unselfishness and trust, as we strive towards achieving a full and complete life together. Now I ask our guests to witness my vows to you. I (Groom’s Name), take you (Bride’s Name), to be my lawful wedded wife and partner, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health as long as we both shall live.

Bride: (Groom’s Name), in affirmation of my love for you, I invite you to join your life with mine from today forward. I will respect you and cherish you always. I promise to share with you all that life has to offer. I give myself to you, in kindness, unselfishness and trust, as we strive towards achieving a full and complete life together. Now I ask our guests to witness my vows to you. I (Bride’s Name), take you (Groom’s Name), to be my lawful wedded husband and partner, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health as long as we both shall live.

Minister: (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) have brought rings to present to one another as a symbol of their marriage vows today. Although there is no precise evidence to explain the origin of the tradition of exchanging wedding rings, there are two strongly held beliefs. The more recent, dating back to the 17th century, explains that during a Christian wedding, the priest arrived at the forth finger (counting the thumb) after touching the three fingers on the left hand '...in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost'. The more ancient and widely accepted explanation, refers to the early Egyptian’s belief that a circle was the symbol of eternity--a sign that life, happiness, and love have no beginning and no end. A wedding ring, or circle, was placed on the third finger of the left hand, the ring finger, because it was traditionally believed that this finger was a direct connection to the heart -- the perfect spot to place a symbol, representing eternal love and commitment. The vena amoris, that is, the vein of love, runs directly from the “ring finger” to the heart.

Now I ask that God bless these rings that (Groom’s and Bride’s Names) will exchange as a symbol of their love and fidelity. Page 50

RING VOWS

Groom: (Bride’s Name), with all that I am and all that I have, I give you this ring as a symbol of my everlasting love.

Bride: (Groom’s Name), with all that I am and all that I have, I give you this ring as a symbol of my everlasting love.

Minister: As you begin your married life together hold close to you the words that you have spoken to each other today. Life isn’t always an easy road, as you both know. Rely on your faith in your promises made today to see you through those times. In times of trouble be strong. Ask God to grant you the gifts of caring and understanding in your life together, allowing that each may be to the other a source of strength in need, a counselor in times of uncertainty, a comfort in times of sorrow, and a companion in your joys.

Remember the word of Kahlil Gibran:

Love one another, but make not a bond of love. Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of our souls. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping, for only the hand of life can contain your hearts. Stand together but not too near together. For the pillars of the temple stand apart and the oak and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.

You have declared before all of us that you will now live your lives together in marriage. You have made special promises to each other, which have been symbolized by the joining of hands, taking of vows and giving and receiving of rings.

By the authority vested in me as a Minister of the State of Wherever, I now pronounce you to be husband and wife.

Now that the ceremony is over and the experience of living day to day is about to begin, go and meet it gladly.

May I have the pleasure of presenting to you, for the first time as husband and wife, Mr. and Mrs. (Name). Page 51

CEREMONY 22 Religious Roses Mothers include Children

We welcome you to this wedding in the name of God the Father who created us, in the name of God the Son who redeemed us with his blood, and in the name of God the Holy Spirit who through his word creates faith to receive all the gifts of our creation and redemption, Amen.

Who gives this women to marry this man?

“Her Mother and l do.”

Marriage is a commitment to life to the best that two people can find and bring out in each other. It offers opportunities for sharing and growth that no other human relationship can equal, a joining that is promised for a lifetime.

Within the circle of its love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important relationships. A wife and a husband are each other's best friend, confidant, lover, teacher, listener, and critic. Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid. It encourages and nurtures new life, new experiences, and new ways of expressing love through the seasons of life.

When two people pledge to love and care for each other in marriage they create a spirit unique to themselves, which binds them closer than any spoken or written words. Marriage is a promise, a potential, made in the hearts of two people who love, which takes a lifetime to fulfill.

We who are witnessing your marriage, hope that despite the stresses inevitable in any life, your love and respect for each other, your trust and understanding of each other will increase your contentment and heighten your joy in living.

VOWS

(Groom’s name), will you have (Bride’s Name) to be your wife and will you pledge your life to her in all love and honor and all duty and service, and in all faith and tenderness, to love and cherish her according to the Lord God and the Holy bond of marriage. Response: "I DO"

(Bride’s Name), will you have (Groom’s Name) to be your husband and will you pledge your life to him in all love and honor and all duty and service, and in all faith and tenderness, to love and cherish him according to the Lord God and the Holy bond of marriage.

Response: "I DO" Page 52

SCRIPTURE READING: 1 Corinthians 13

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

VOWS

Groom: I choose you, (Bride’s Name), for who you are and who you

may become; To assist you in your tasks;

To be sensitive to your needs;

To give of myself to the fullest development of your life;

To be challenged by you to the fullest development of my own life;

To trust you in all ways and to be faithful to you in all things.

I will love you and comfort you.

I will honor you and keep you in sickness and in health, in good times

and in bad.

I will ennoble you always respecting your freedom to be who you are

and to share in responsible service to the world of which we both

remain a part.

Bride: I choose you, (Groom’s Name), for who you are and who you

may become; To assist you in your tasks;

To be sensitive to your needs;

To give of myself to the fullest development of your life;

To be challenged by you to the fullest development of my own life;

To trust you in all ways and to be faithful to you in all things.

I will love you and comfort you.

I will honor you and keep you in sickness and in health, in good times

and in bad. Page 53

I will ennoble you always respecting your freedom to be who you are

and to share in responsible service to the world of which we both

remain a part.

RING VOWS

(Bride’s Name), receive this ring as a symbol of my love and

commitment in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

(Groom’s Name), receive this ring as a symbol of my love and

commitment in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

ROSE CEREMONY

(Names of Couple’s Mothers) Marriage is a coming together of two lives and a celebration of the love of two people. But it is more. The love that (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), feel for one another is the flowering of a seed their parents planted in their hearts years ago. As they embrace one another in their love, so do they embrace the families, which have been brought together on this happy occasion. As a token of their love for their families, (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) would like to offer these symbols of eternal love, these roses, to their mothers.

PRESENTATION OF GUARDIAN ANGELS TO CHILDREN

Just as (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) are joined together as man and wife, they are also being joined together into and part of a larger family, this includes (Children’s Names). And so these Guardian Angels will always remind (Children’s Names), that today is and always will be a special day. It is a day when (four) become one.

Minister: May the God who gives us peace make you holy in every way and keep your whole being spirit, soul, and body free from every fault at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. He who calls you will do it, because he is faithful. Page 54

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) invite you to pray along with them by reciting the Lord's Prayer.

Our Father, which art in heaven

Hallowed be Thy name

Thy kingdom come

Thy will be done

In earth as it is in heaven

Give us this day our daily bread

And forgive us our trespasses

As we forgive those who trespass against us

Lead us not into temptation

But deliver us from evil

For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory forever

Amen

Be joyful always, pray at all times, be thankful in all circumstances.

This is what God wants from you in your life in union with Christ Jesus.

The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you always.

Amen.

You have declared before all of us that you will live together in marriage. You have made special promises to each other which have been symbolized by the joining of hands, taking of vows and the giving and receiving of rings.

By the authority vested in me, I now pronounce you to be husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride!

It is now my pleasure to present to you, Mr. and Mrs. (Name). Page 55

CEREMONY 23 Religious with Children and Rose Ceremony

Thank you and welcome to the joining together in marriage between (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) and the joining of the children (Children’s Names) into a family as one.

Let us pray.

Eternal God, we give thanks to you for the gift of life and for its renewal with each day. We gather to celebrate this time, which brings (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) together in marriage. For the dreams they have dreamed and for their hopes for themselves and for each other we give thanks. We pray that the words and spirit of our gathering may be filled with meaning which will deepen with the passing years.

Prayer of Thanksgiving:

Such events move us to step back and examine our own vows and commitments so often taken for granted.

Thank you for the privilege we have of sharing this sacred moment. Thank you for this marriage in which two people become more than they are, out of love for one another. Thank you for love’s willingness to forgive, allowing us to leave the past behind and make a new heaven and a new earth our dwelling place. We ask your blessing and in want, in life and in death, abide with them and they with you. Amen.

Who giveth this woman to be married to this man?

(Groom’s Name) and (Bride’s Name) will you at this time, express to each other the vows you have chosen?

I (Groom’s Name) take you (Bride’s Name) to be my lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, to comfort you and to keep you in sickness and in health. Forsaking all others and keeping only to you, to love, honor and cherish you from this day forward as long as we both shall live.

I (Bride’s Name) take you (Groom’s Name) to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, to comfort you and to keep you in sickness and in health. Forsaking all others and keeping only to you, to love, honor and cherish you from this day forward as long as we both shall live.

These rings symbolize a solid ring, a ring with no seam, no beginning no end and so also are symbolic of your never ending love for and too each other.

(Bride’s Name) with this ring I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a pledge of my love.

(Groom’s Name) with this ring I thee wed. Take it and wear it as a pledge of my love. Page 56

Invite children forward.

I have pledged my love to you and promised to be a faithful husband. Now I want to add another, different kind of vow. I promise to love (Children’s Names) for all of our days and to treat them as if they were my own. I gladly accept the obligations that go along with this pledge. I love (Children’s Names) and want them to be part of my life.

UNITY CANDLE

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) light the candles, which represent their love for each other. From the uniqueness of these separate flames, they kindle a larger brighter flame, which represents the union. The side candles remain burning to symbolize the continuing importance of the individual integrity within the marriage relationship. The great height of the center candle depicts their belief that together they can become more than either could alone.

ROSE CEREMONY

Marriage is a coming together of two lives and a celebration of the love of two people. But it is more. The love that (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) feel for one another is the flowering of a seed their mothers, planted in their hearts years ago. As they embrace one another in their love, so do they embrace the families, which have been brought together on this happy occasion. As a token of their love for their families (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) would like to offer these roses as symbols of eternal love.

Hand roses to mothers.

This concludes the ceremony. It only remains for me to thank you all for coming and to pronounce (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) not only husband and wife but Mr. and Mrs. (name) and family. Page 57

CEREMONY 24 Religious Quaker

This is a typical example of a Quaker wedding.

The couples enter the meeting room and take seats at the front of the room.

In taking the seats and giving themselves to each other, they eliminate the custom of another person giving away the bride. And because Friends believe that God alone can create a marriage union, no third person announces the couple as husband and wife. (Not having an officiant is legal only in certain states. If you are interested in such a wedding, you need to check on its legal status)

In quiet and reverence, the couple arises, this is done in an atmosphere of silence.

They then hold hands and one after the other they recite.

I take thee, (Bride’s Name) in the presence of God and these our friends, to be my wife, and promise, with divine assistance, to be unto thee a loving and faithful husband so long as we both shall live.

I take thee, (Groom’s Name) in the presence of God and these our friends, to be my husband, and promise, with divine assistance, to be unto thee a loving and faithful wife so long as we both shall live.

The couple then sits down again and the Marriage Certificate, which announces the vows they have just taken is brought for them to sign. Then someone reads the certificate aloud.

The meeting continues in silent waiting upon God while those assembled share in the worship through prayer and meditation or through spoken messages.

When the meeting is through, those present are asked to sign the certificate as witnesses to the marriage. Page 58

CEREMONY 25 Alternative Commencement Spiritual

Marriage is a bonding of strangers made beautifully familiar through the miracle of love, the process of un-strangering one another through the power of loving and the gift of time. Marriage brings two people together not only in the present, but in the presence of their past, of the lives they have led-the choices they have made, the lessons that have shaped and reshaped the chambers of their hearts. Thus to be marrying again is different than simply to be marrying.

And so, as you contemplate reentering the very state that wounded you, you may be tempted to blind yourself to all the sorrows, difficulties, and disappointments of your past relationships, to look at this marriage as separate, distinct, and completely unrelated to all the relationships that preceded it.

This is a worthy temptation; it would be wonderful to think that this relationship--and your readiness for it-arrived at your doorstep out of the blue. But that isn't the case, and in trying to view it this way you separate yourself from your own evolution as a person. For the other relationships you've had, you went through not instead of being in this relationship, but in order to be in it. This marriage is the culmination of years of apprenticeship, the winnowing and honing of your previous relationships to help shape you into the person who stands here today, ready to make the ultimate commitment of love.

Therefore, when you doubt the relevance of your past -- and you will at times -- or when you feel embarrassed about it -- which, at times you may --remember that every relationship you have had was a step on the path to this relationship. The past was prologue. Every single conflict and disappointment, every beautiful, grueling, and painfully instructive moment in each of those relationships was delivered to your consciousness in preparation for this love.

Your experiences then are the laundry ticket for the silk garments you are retrieving from the cleaners now. What you did then was the antecedent, the exquisitely appropriate conditioning for what you are doing now. Everything was of value; everything taught you something, prepared you for marrying again, most happily now.

Acknowledging the past as preparation allows you to step most gracefully into the present, and having done so, you need to remind one another that this union is unique. This is not just 'another' relationship; it is the relationship, which is the consequence and fulfillment of the others; it is the last and the best. It has qualities contributed by both of you that make it the highest expression of what you two can offer through the medium of an intimate relationship. Therefore, be generous in reminding one another not only of what a gem of a relationship you have here, but also of the singular set of qualities you each possess. Page 59

The attributes, values, and convictions that can allow you to legitimately believe to the depths of your hearts that this is the love that will last until the end of your days.

Sometimes when we've finally arrived at a longed-for destination, there's a temptation simply to be where we are, without discovering the possibilities inherent in our new state. This marriage may feel like a destination, a sweet safe place in which you can finally rest, but it is also an opportunity, the emotional and spiritual environment in which you can both develop to your highest brilliance. This is the person with whom you can do all the precious things you've wanted all your life to do. This is the time to receive and intend, to fulfill not only the joy of your heart but the possibilities of your life.

Therefore, remember to do the simple and beautiful things that will make this love a treasure. Fight well. Play. Communicate with one another. Focus on what you want, and entice your intentions into being. Plan for the things that are important to you; make sure you do them. This love is to be nurtured, to be lived out to the fullest in every aspect of its dreams -- in the simple ceremonies of shared daily life, in realized hopes and long-deferred plans, in a quality of emotional exchange and spiritual communion toward which the whole of your life has been leaning.

And finally, be thankful for one another. Love is always a gift. A great compliment is being paid to you in being given another chance, another opportunity to love. You have been delivered to your ultimate partner, the person with whom you can share the fruits of all the lessons in your life. Not everyone has this opportunity; not everyone is granted this cornucopia of happiness.

This love was completely unexpected, the joyful consequence of nothing you could control. While everything you have experienced prepared you for it, there was nothing you could do to actually bring it into being; and so it is, indeed, one of life's totally unexpected miracles.

In the presence of a miracle, one of the great human impulses is to disbelieve it or think that somehow we are unworthy of it. Yet it is in the very nature of miracles that we are unworthy of them, that we ourselves did nothing to bring them about. The way to be worthy of the miracle of this love is, simply, to receive it. Open your heart; open your hands, open your eyes, and allow the radiance of this love, this love for which you have waited so long, for which you have learned so much, to utterly and endlessly illumine you.

Love is the gift that has been given to you and it is also the gilt that you must now give back: to embody, to live out the love, the hope, the joy, the incomparable radiance, and the incredible mirroring that you have had the great good fortune to be given. Page 60

CEREMONY 26 Alternative Commencement Spiritual

We have come together with great happiness to acknowledge the new life and the emotional delight of (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), who after struggling with enemies without and within have become the happy and grateful recipients of a deep and abiding love.

A wedding is always a happy occasion, but this one is all the more joyful because it represents not only the coming together of two wonderful people but also the fulfillment of the liberation of their individual selves, the completion of a healing that required great faith and took thousands of intricate steps to accomplish. This is a process with which we can all identify. For while we generally think of recovery as a release from the abuse of a specific substance, all of us struggle against our own personal odds to become most fully ourselves.

We are happy for (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) and grateful to them because they embody the miracle of the possible. They stand before us revealing the power of love to heal; they teach us that loving yourself is a worthy enterprise; they show us that self-love creates the window of possibility of love between one another.

Their ability to transform their difficulties into new and shining possibilities bodes well for their marriage. For transformation is an unavoidable consequence of marriage, in a sense its greatest achievement; and so as they enter into marriage and even more as they live their lives inside its hallowed gates, rather than resisting the transformations that are the hallmark of love's work. they are already well equipped to embrace the process that will constantly reshape them. They have already shown their willingness to grow beyond their limitations and we join them gladly in the formal solemnizing of their willingness to continue this beautiful process through their marriage. Page 61

CEREMONY 27 Alternative Commencement Spiritual

We are gathered here in the presence of God and of this company to join in holy marriage (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) and to bear witness to the transforming power of love that lies within them both.

Love is a quality of spirit and an attitude of the emotions, but a marriage is a life's work, a spiritual art form and a love so strong, it is so wonderful and powerful.

Therefore, this is an occasion of both profound joy and great responsibility, and we who partake in it bind ourselves as witnesses to the labor of love that (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) are undertaking here.

In acknowledgment of this holy purpose and of the power of this occasion, let us pray.

God of Light, who gives us the longing for love and the capability of loving, we give you thanks for (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), for their open hearts and willing spirits, and for the example of love that they embody here in our presence.

Be with them on this joyous occasion of showing their love and making their vows; and be with us, their witnesses, that we may all be changed by what is said and witnessed here.

READING: Colossians 3:12-14

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassion, kindness, lowliness, meekness, and patience, forbearing one another, and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must also forgive.

And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.

Jointly in marriage and in love, for the highest use of all, I pronounce you man and wife. Page 62

CEREMONY 28 Alternative Commencement Spiritual

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names), Mr. and Mrs. (names of the bride's parents), and Mr. and Mrs. (names of the groom's parents), beloved friends, colleagues, accomplices, witnesses. We have come here to celebrate the marriage and the intertwining of destinies of (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) who, through being ruthlessly and wonderfully themselves, have fallen in love and chosen to get married.

Whether we know it or not, the path of our lives is already laid out deep within us, and life is the process of being willing to discover the direction of our path, the giving of ourselves to whatever it takes to be able to hit the mark. In other words, we are all here for a reason, and it is our business, as our lives progress, not only to discover what that purpose is but also to cultivate the conditions -- whether emotional, educational, personal, or geo-graphic -- that allow us to fulfill that highest purpose.

In this context, marriage is a nurturing matrix in which two individuals can continue to expand and develop, so they can fulfill their individual destinies and offer their gifts to life and to the world. In this view, the focus is not so much on the couple and what they may undertake together, but more on the power of the individuals and what they have to contribute through their lives, how their union serves to enlarge and develop each of them.

Although this may appear on the surface to be an unromantic vision of love, it is a view that holds a relationship in the highest spiritual regard, for it has as its underlying assumption that each of us is alive for an important purpose, and that marriage enhances that capacity for individual contribution and participation.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) have stretched their individual development so far that they are no longer laboring alone to become themselves, but have arrived at the point in self-discovery where they can offer themselves as accomplices of destiny to one another.

It is in this spirit that they marry, not just because of their ineffable attraction to one another, but because the composite of their experiences has brought them to the place where they are ready to fulfill what is theirs to accomplish in this life. To join the forces of their individual spirits, capabilities, and backgrounds for the purpose of accomplishing together and individually what is theirs to do.

Therefore, we celebrate with them their arrival at the portal of true and conscious loving. We are incredibly happy for them and with them that one of the landmarks in the vast landscape of their becoming is the love that has brought them, and us, to the joyous occasion of this marriage. Page 63

CEREMONY 29 Alternative Commencement Spiritual

Love is a miraculous gift, and a wedding is a celebration of that magic, and that's what we're here to do today. We are gathered together to be overjoyed for and with (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) who are so wonderfully suited to one another that it's a pure delight for the rest of us to see how ebulliently happy two people can be.

When we think of love we sometimes talk about people who "deserve" one another. Not only do (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) deserve one another, but they are a perfect match, a pair, a fit, two hybrid peas in a pod; and their marriage, far from being something they have had to work hard to achieve, was pure inevitability. They were given to one another and fell so deeply in love that they had no choice.

They are the embodiment of true romance which, matured, becomes true love. They are the example of love that in its lightheartedness dissolves the notion of love as hard work. They are the promise of possibility, the expectation of joyful surprise. So, hooray! We're here to celebrate, to honor, to laugh, to dance, and to be glad because the inevitable has happened. Love is alive and well in the land (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) are here to prove it, and we are here to celebrate with them.

Angels, magicians, wizards, and all good beings, join with us on this happy day and let this be a day of gladness, thanksgiving, possibility, and great good fortune for all of us, but especially for (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), who are coming together to demonstrate the wonder of love through the celebration of their marriage.

We all live in the hope of loving and being loved, and any sign of the blossoming of love is a true inspiration. Therefore we give thanks for the sweet happiness of (Bride’s and Groom’s Names). Their enthusiasm is electric, their belief in the destiny of their love is inspiring; their great expectations encourage us beyond measure.

Marriage is a very special place, the sheltered environment in which we can endlessly explore ourselves in the presence of another and in which we can offer the possibility of the true reflection of another. We are so happy that (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) have found one another, that they know in their souls how perfectly mated they are, and that they are choosing on this day of most special days to become for all time the accurate and beautiful reflection of each other's essence. We ask that the vision they have of one another be always informed by the spellbinding radiant power that first brought them together, and we pray that as they move into the hallowed ground that is marriage they may always hold one another in the light of all light, the love of all love. Page 64

CEREMONY 30 Alternative Commencement

We're gathered here today to celebrate the wedding of (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), and we are so exuberant and grateful. We're exuberant because, frankly, it's wonderful that (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) have fallen in love, that they feel so good about one another, so delighted, and encouraged, so known and supported, that they've chosen to risk to love for life, to take the great emotional trapeze leap of linking up with one another in midair and midnight. Their optimism is an inspiration; their daring is exhilarating.

For them, of course, today is absolutely wonderful, a magical rabbit pulled out of life's hat. Out of the routine of ordinary life the extraordinary has happened. They had no idea that they would stumble on one another at (include here a bit of where and how you met), go through all the thrills and excitement of the initial delicious stages of romance, to discover the love of substance and depth they are consecrating with marriage today. They were so happy that they didn't even realize they were serious, that the love that so utterly captivated them, that made them feel like wonderful, was also a love of depth and importance.

Romance is play, but true love is intention, and it is their intention to love for life that we are celebrating today. But today is also a celebration for the rest of us, for it is also a pleasure for us to see love in bloom, to participate in the wedding of two people so delightfully as they are, in becoming one.

It lifts our spirits and to be in the presence of such a love, to bask in the sweet energies of two people who so obviously adore one another, who want to play together, laugh together, walk together for a lifetime. Love untarnished, that is the gift that (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) give us; love with garlands of ribbons and posies, love with infinite hope. Therefore, (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) thank you. You've brightened our day. Thanks for letting us celebrate with you; thanks for showing us that love can bloom, that marriage is a worthy enterprise, and that happy, high-spirited people are overjoyed to undertake it.

And now, before we get to the party, let me say a few words of encouragement and direction to you two. First of all, a wedding is a happy occasion, flawless in its good humor, its joyful sense of well-being, but your marriage won't always be like this. For, as you live it out, you will discover that your relationship has moods and seasons, high times as well as lulls and dead-dog bone-dry gulches. From time to time, the delightful spirit of this wedding day will not be with you, and when it is taken over by the love, you will have to reach for something deeper in yourselves, for the love that is stronger than feel-good; the love that is truer than fun, the love that requires energy as well as feasts on it. Your wedding is without question a happy occasion, but your marriage will be a many-textured thing. In it, both magic and sorrows will befall you. Page 65

You will intend one thing and end up doing another. You will imagine your darling to be a certain way and discover that he is not, that she is a person unto herself. You will have clashes and discover things you did and did not want to know. You will rumple each other's spirits as well as bedclothes and hair.

You will say mean and terrible words, and, for love, be able to forget them. You will betray one another in tiny and sometimes huge and perhaps devastating ways, and, for love, forgive one another and go on.. These, the great and petty perils of marriage, are an invitation to refine your love and deepen it, to expand it beyond the light-spiritedness and laughter that enliven your hearts today and explore the more profound reaches of compassion, of tender caring, of selfless nurturing. These capacities are the maturing of love through time, love's highest calling and its finest work. And marriage is the summons to be open not only to these challenges but also to the opportunities, unexpected and not necessarily always welcome, that invite them into being. Second, remember that a relationship is a progression. There's an old Chinese proverb that says, The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. For you, (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), your wedding today is an exquisite and beautifully choreographed first step. With it you are passing through a portal that will lead you to many places, including ones you can't possibly imagine. Wherever it takes you, there will be surprises, for this is the mark of a truly loving relationship -- that it will take you where you had not meant to go.

There is great joy to be found in such a surprising journey, with twists and turns, shades and possibilities beyond your wildest imaginings. Instead of resisting the changes, allow them to flower in you and know that they are leading you somewhere, that, separately and together, you are becoming more than you were. Don't expect every day to have the fanciful mood or the exuberant high spirits of this, your wedding day, but be excited, open-minded, curious, available, and inquiring about who you are becoming. Know that your composite experiences are turning you into the highest form of yourselves, that you are becoming the best and the most, that you are doing the things that only you two together could possibly do.

Therefore, along with celebrating the marvelous feelings of today, remember, especially when you are saying your vows, that you are also promising to love for the long and ambiguous future. If you can hold on to this intention, then instead of bowing down or bowing out when you've misplaced your delight, you can ride out the storms with confidence, knowing that the thunderhead-clouded skies are temporary and not a reflection of your relationship as a whole. Page 66

Above all, remember that love is what matters. Love will prevail. It is the love you feel for one another that will be the answer to all your difficulties. If in marrying you have chosen well and promised wisely, love will be stronger than the conflicts, bigger than the changes. Love will be the miracle always inviting you to learn, to blossom, to expand. And it is to love, to the love you are celebrating, embodying, and radiating on this special day, that you must always return.

So remember these things, my dear ones, as you go out into the world as a couple: that your love will have seasons, that your relationship is a progression, and that love will prevail. Remembering them, holding them in your hearts and in your minds, will give you a marriage as deep in its joy as your courtship has been in its magic.

Congratulations, (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), the real fun has just begun. Page 67

CEREMONY 31 Alternative Commencement

We have come together with great happiness to acknowledge the new life and the emotional delight of (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), who after struggling with enemies without and within have become the happy and grateful participants in a deep and abiding love.

A wedding is always a happy occasion, but this one is all the more joyful because it represents not only the coming together of two wonderful people but also the fulfillment of the liberation of their individual selves, the completion of a healing that required great faith and took thousands of intricate steps to accomplish. This is a process with which we can all identify. For although we generally think of recovery as a release from the abuse of a specific substance, all of us struggle against our own personal odds to become most fully ourselves.

We are happy for (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), and grateful to them because they embody the miracle of the possible. They stand before us revealing the power of love to heal. They teach us that loving yourself is a worthy enterprise. They show us that self-love creates the window of possibility of love between one another.

Their ability to transform their difficulties into new and shining possibilities bodes well for their marriage. For transformation is an unavoidable consequence of marriage, in a sense its greatest achievement. So as they enter into marriage and even more as they live their lives inside its hallowed gates, rather than resisting the transformations that are the hallmark of love's work, they are already well equipped to embrace the process that will constantly reshape them. They have already shown their willingness to grow beyond their limitations, and we join them gladly in the formal solemnizing of their willingness to continue this beautiful process through their marriage.

We stand on tiptoe with thanksgiving for the love that has united (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), the visible reward of their healing and the consecration of their individual lives. We ask that this day be a true celebration not only for them but also for us. Allow us to be inspired by the example of their healing, enlarged by their joy, and delighted by the happiness they have brought into our midst. We give thanks for this beautiful day, for this marvelous occasion, and for the love which is the bond that binds them each to one another and to all of us gathered here today. Page 68

READING: Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow; but woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up.

Again, if two lie together, they are warm; but how can one be warm alone?

And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him.

VOWS: To be inserted from Vow Section.

I now present to you all gathered here today, family and friends (Mr. and Mrs. Names to be added)

Live long, live well, live in love, have fun and love to you all. Page 69

CEREMONY 32 Alternative Commencement

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) have decided to seal their marriage with this wedding, so on their behalf I welcome you today. In their relationship they have reached the conviction that they are for each other. They see this commitment as a serious occasion, they approach it with a sense of reverence, but also with joy and happiness. Real love between a man and a woman is perhaps the highest experience that is possible to humankind. Such love reduces selfishness, deepens personalities, but above all gives life new purpose and meaning.

We are here because (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) do not, and cannot live in isolation. The experience of their love touches all of us and it is fitting that we should celebrate their happiness. This wedding gives public recognition to the private experience of their love. At a different level we share in it, we rejoice for them, and we support them.

Though marriage means the greatest intimacy between two persons that is possible to man, yet this closeness should not diminish but stimulate each partner to grow as an individual. A responsibility of each marriage partner is to be the guardian and encourager of the other's need to be alone, to develop their own talents and qualities. It is from the balance of individuality and union that "love", as the saying goes, "whose incredible strength is equal only to its incredible fragility, is born and reborn."

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) know that a relationship of real love can never be taken for granted but can only survive and grow, when both lovers maintain the will to openly and sensitively develop their relationship as equals. It is in the spirit that they now stand before us.

CEREMONY 33 Alternative

An alternate commencement to the start of the Ceremony can be inserted in place of any others.

Marriage is for the companionship, help, consideration and love which husband and wife ought to have for each other. Within its framework of commitment and loyalty, marriage enables the establishment of a home where, through tolerance, patience and courage, the love and affection of a man and a woman may develop into a deep and lasting relationship.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names) have honored us all here today by inviting us to be present with them during this time. What they mean to each other is obvious. Their commitment to each other has been made for some time. They are adult people. They have chosen to live together. Their choice is responsible, free, independent and happy.

Of all the men and women they know they have chosen each other, to journey through life together. Page 70

CEREMONY 34 Alternative Commencement

Throughout history there have been great love stories. There are tales of men and women who have been through great suffering, terrible conflicts; who have overcome seemingly insurmountable barriers to be with one another. Every love story in its own way has a certain greatness, a certain sublimity. There is often the untold history of physical and mental hardship, the fear and agony of difficult decision making, the shattering darkness of the great breaks in life's pattern, and then almost unbelievably, the "light at the end of the tunnel."

"True love", tradition tells us, "never runs smooth". But there does come a time when the forces that have sought to destroy, admit defeat and disintegrate and love triumphs.

This is a happy occasion when (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) stand before us to declare and celebrate their love and their marriage. Their path, like the many to whom I have, in general, referred, has not been easy. Perhaps, because of this they value their commitment and their happiness, and indeed this wedding, much more than had it been otherwise. They know that they can never take their relationship for granted. They know that they have found in each other that unique, yet mysterious quality whereby they know that they are meant for each other. They know too with the poet that "true love comes but once."

Love, in human life, is acknowledged by all, but it eludes all defining and explanation. Only the poets dare comment.

When we think about this union between (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) today we take a certain heart. In the midst of the selfishness, the competition, and the ambition of modern life love intrudes its inexplicable and extraordinary softening influence. This marriage encourages all of us because when a man and a woman find joy and happiness in giving and caring, in cooperating and compromising it says something to all mankind. If we recognize that life at its deepest and most personal must be selfless and loving to bring human happiness, then so it must be in the wider community of all the world. It is to celebrate (Bride’s and Groom’s Names) love, to be influenced by it, and to take it in our lives to others that we have assembled here today. Page 71

CEREMONY 35 Re-Affirmation Ceremony

Suggested Re-affirmation Ceremony

Today is your, (Couples’ Names) wedding anniversary and your celebration. On the (date) you took upon yourselves the responsibility of married life. This afternoon we gather here to renew your marriage vows and to re-affirm with happiness a new era in your life. It will be a time when you can concentrate on developing your continued love for each other, freer than you have been from the tensions and hassles which characterize the struggle to become established in life and in nurturing a growing relationship.

This anniversary is a time when you can reassure each other. As you express to each other deep loyalty and loving trust as the continued basis of your marriage relationship.

The anniversary is, as it were a plateau from which you can look together with gratitude and humility in your hearts on the years that have passed, conscious of the sharing, the caring, the joys and sorrows, of family life and of wonderful friends made; and you can look forward to the future with strength and assurance of even wider joys and experiences.

Both of you believe in marriage and in the fullness of the husband and wife relationship and you know that a deep bond unites you both together. All the stresses and tensions of the past have not weakened your love but have only made you more determined to stand by each other.

This relationship is and must be very deep - as the poet says,

“Deep calls to the deep in the roar of the cataracts”

Your relationship, I know, is as important to you as life itself. Today’s re-commitment should encourage you both to continue that dedication to each other so that you can look forward to a settled and contented future. Page 72

READING 1 Corinthians 13

Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited, it is never rude or selfish, it does not take offense and it is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people’s faults, but delights in the truth.

It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope. It is always ready to endure whatever comes. True love does not come to an end. Two lives, two people, so very different, yet so similar. Together we stand as one, sharing our future as it comes. The past is that – past.

Buds are yet to blossom, with care and trust, the best to be revealed. Honesty and kindness, are the fruits of love. Lord bless this day and always, to enrich us so our love will never end.

Before you are re-joined together in marriage in my presence and in the presence of these your family, friends and witnesses, I am to remind you once more of the serious and binding nature of the relationship you are now about to re-enter.

Marriage as most of us understand it, is a voluntary and full commitment of a man to a woman and a woman to a man. It is made in the deepest sense to the exclusion of all others and is entered into with the desire, hope and the firm intention that it will last for life.

Minister: I shall now ask you to take your vows.

I (Groom’s Name) re-affirm my love to you (Bride’s Name) as I invite you to share my life. I promise always to respect your needs. I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust to achieve the warm rich life we now look forward to. To this end, I call upon all present to witness that I continue to take you to be my lawful wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health while we both shall live.

I (Bride’s Name) re-affirm my love to you (Groom’s Name) as I invite you to share my life. I promise always to respect your needs. I will endeavor through kindness, unselfishness and trust to achieve the warm rich life we now look forward to. To this end, I call upon all present to witness that I continue to take you to be my lawful husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health while we both shall live. Page 73

VOWS

Groom: (Bride’s Name), with this ring I thee again wed. Take it and wear it as a pledge of my love, and as a symbol of all we shall share.

Bride: (Groom’s Name), with this ring I thee again wed. Take it and wear it as a pledge of my love, and as a symbol of all we shall share.

Minister: (Bride’s and Groom’s Names), you have declared before all of us that you will continue to live together in marriage. You have made special promises to each other which have been symbolized by the joining of hands, taking of vows and the giving and receiving of two rings.

I declare that the blessing of the Lord Jesus Christ be with you and also the blessing of all of us will remain with you as husband and wife.

Now that the ceremony is over and the experience of living day by day is about to re-commence, go and meet life gladly.

Embrace and re-introduction of Mr. and Mrs. (Name). Page 74

CEREMONY 36 Christian Medieval Ceremony

This is a popularized Medieval ceremony... It is a short version of the full, original text - for which some couples then add modern passages or readings to it. It also is shorter.

At the day and time appointed for solemnization of Matrimony, the persons to be married shall come into the porch of the Church with their friends and neighbors; and there standing together, the Man on the right hand, and the woman on the left, with that person who shall give the Woman betwixt them, the Priest shall say:

Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God to join together this Man and this Woman in holy Matrimony; which is an honorable estate, instituted of God in Paradise, and into which holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined. Therefore if any man can show any just cause, why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter for ever hold his peace. I require and charge you both, as ye will answer at the dreadful day of judgment when the secrets of all hearts shall be disclosed, that if either of you know any impediment, why ye may not be lawfully joined together in Matrimony, that ye confess it. For ye be well assured, that so many as be coupled together otherwise than God's Word doth allow are not joined together by God; neither is their Matrimony lawful. At which day of Marriage, if any man do allege and declare any impediment, why they may not be coupled together in Matrimony, by God's Law, or the Laws of the Realm; and will be bound, and sufficient sureties with him, to the parties; or else put in a Caution (to the full value of such charges as the persons to be married do thereby sustain) to prove his allegation; then the solemnization must be deferred, until such time as the truth be tried. If no impediment be alleged, then shall the

Priest say unto the Man: Wilt the have this Woman to be thy wedded wife, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt the love her, comfort her, honor, and keep her, in sickness and in health; and forsaking all other, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live? The Man shall answer: I will. Then shall the Priest say to the Woman: Wilt the have this man to be thy wedded husband, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt the obey him, and serve him, love, honor, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live? The Woman shall answer: I will. Thus ends the formal betrothal. The couple shall advance to the Altar, led by the Minister, who shall then turn to the assembled company, and say: Page 75

Who giveth this Woman to be married to this Man? The person who gives the Woman shall answer, and shall place the Woman's right hand in the hand of the Minister, and then shall retire. Then shall they give their troth to each other in this manner: The Minister, receiving the Woman at her father's or friend's hands, shall cause the Man with his right hand to take the Woman by her right hand, and to say after him as followeth,

GROOM' VOW: "I, ___________, take thee __________ to my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, for fairer or fouler, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us depart, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereunto I plight thee my troth. Then shall they loose their hands; and the Woman, with her right hand taking the Man by his right hand, shall likewise say after the Minister,

BRIDE'S VOW: I ___________ take thee___________ to my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to be bonny and buxom at bed and at board, to love and to cherish, till death us depart, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereunto I plight thee my troth.

Then shall they again loose their hands; and the Man shall give unto the Woman a Ring, laying the same upon the Book with the accustomed duty to the Priest and Clerk. And the Priest shall bless the Ring(s) in the following manner:

Bless these Rings, O merciful Lord, that those who wear them, that give and receive them, may be ever faithful to one another, remain in your peace, and live and grow old together in your love, under their own vine and fig tree, and seeing their children's children. Amen.

And the Priest, taking the Ring, shall deliver it to the Man, to put it on the fourth finger of the Woman's left hand. And the Man holding the ring there, and taught by the Priest, shall say,

GROOM: With this Ring I thee wed, (here placing it upon her thumb) and with my body I thee honor, (here placing it upon her index finger) and with all my worldly goods I thee endow; (here placing it upon her ring finger) In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen. Page 76

If it be a double-ring ceremony, let the Woman do the same as the Man, giving him the ring, and repeating the same words as he. They both shall kneel down; and the Minister shall say,

Let us pray. O Eternal God, Creator and Preserver of all mankind, Giver of all spiritual grace, the Author of everlasting life; Send thy blessing upon these thy servants, this man and this woman, whom we bless in thy Name; + that, as Isaac and Rebecca lived faithfully together, so these persons may surely perform and keep the vow and covenant betwixt them made, whereof this Ring given and received is a token and pledge, and may ever hereafter remain in perfect love and peace together, and live according to thy laws; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. And here shall be said the LORD'S PRAYER.

Then shall the Priest join their right hands together, and say,

Those whom God hath joined together let no man put asunder. Then shall the Minister speak unto the people. Forasmuch as N and N have consented together in holy wedlock, and have witnessed the same before God and this company, and thereto have given and pledged their troth each to the other, and have declared the same by giving and receiving of a Ring, and by joining of hands; I pronounce therefore that they be Man and Wife together, in the Name of the Father, + and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen

The Minister shall add this blessing.

God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit, bless, preserve, and keep you; the Lord mercifully with his favor look upon you; and so fill you with all spiritual benediction and grace, that ye may so live together in this life, that in the world to come ye may have life everlasting. Amen.

And here the Minister shall turn the couple to the Company, and they may kiss each the other, and then proceed from the Altar. And if it be the wish of the couple to take Communion, they may do it privately, following these ceremonies. Page 77

CEREMONY 37 Prayerbook of Edward VI 1537-1553

First the bannes must be asked three seueral Soondaies or holye dayes, in the service tyme, the people beeyng presente, after the accustomed manner.

And if the persons that woulde bee maried dwel in diuers parishes, the bannes must bee asked in bothe parishes, and the Curate of thone parish shall not solemnize matrimonie betwixt them, withoute a certificate of the bannes beeyng thrise asked from the Curate of thother parishe.

At the daye appointed for Solenizacion of Matrimonie, the persones to be maried shal come into the bodie of ye churche, with theyr frends and neighbors. And there the preist shal thus saye.

Deerly beloued friends, we are gathered together here in the syght of God, and in the face of his congregationm to ioyne together this man and this woman on holy matrmonie, which is an honorable estate instituted of God in paradise, in the time of mannes [inncecie?], signifying unto us the mistcal union that is betwixte Christe and his Churche: which holy estste, Christe adorned and beutified with his presence, and first miracle that he wrought in Cana of Galile, and is commended of Sainct Paule to be honorable emong all men; and is therfore not to bee enterprised, nor taken in hande unaduisedlye, lightelye, or wantonly to satisfye mens carnal lustes and appetites, like brute beastes that haue no understanding: but reuerentely, discretely, aduisedly, soberly, and in the feare of God. Duely consideryng the causes for the whiche matrimonie was ordained. One cause was the procreacion of children, to be brought up in the feare and nurture of the Lord, an prayse of God. Secondly it was ordained for a remedie agaynst sinne, and to auoide fornicatcion, that suche persones as bee maried, might liue chastlie in matrimonie, and kepe themselues undefiled members of Christes bodye.Thirdlye for the mutuall societe, helpe, and coumfort, that the one oughte to haue of thother, boht in prosperitie and aduersitie. Into the whiche holy estate these two presones present come noew to be ioyned. Therfore if any man can shewe any iuste cause why they maie not lawfully be ioyned so together: Leat him now speake, or els hereafter for euer hold his peace.

And also speakyng to the persones that shalbe maried, he shalle saie.

I require and charge you (as you will aunswere at the dreadfull daye of iudgemente, when the secretes of all hartes shalbe disclosed) that if either of you doe knowe of any impedimente, why ye maie not bee lawfully ioyned together in matrimonie, that ye confesse it. For be ye wel assured, that so manye as bee coupled together otherwaies the Goddes woord doeth allow: are not ioyned of God, neither is their matrimonie lawful. Page 78

At which daye of mariage yf any man doe allege any impedimente why they maye not be coupled together on matrmonie; And will be bound and suritied with hym, to the parties, or els put in a caution to the full value of suche charges as the persones to bee maried do susteyne to proue allegacion: the the Solemnizacion muste bee differred, unto suche tyme as the trueth be tried. Yf no impedimente bee alleged, then shall the Curate saye unto the man.

[N.] Willte thou haue this woman to thy wedde wife, to liue together after Goddes ordeinuce in the holy estate of matrimonie? Wilt thou loue her, coumforte her, honor, and kepe her in sicknesse and in health? And forsaking all other kepe thee only to her, so long as you both shall liue?

The man shall aunswere.

I will.

Then shall the priest saye to the woman.

[N.] Wilt thou haue this man to thy wedde houseband, to liue together after Goddes ordienaunce, in the holy estate of matrimonie? Wilt thou abey him, and serue him, loue, honor, and kepe him in sicknes, and in health? And forsaking al other kepe thee onely to him, so long as you bothe shall liue?

The woman shall aunswere.

I will.

Then shall the Minister say.

Who qeueth this woman to be maried to this man?

And the minister receiuing the woman at her father or frendes handes: shall cause the man to take the woman by the right hande, and so either geue their trouth to the other: the man first saying.

I [N.] take thee [N.] to my wedde wife, to haue and to holde from this day forwarde, for better, for wurse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness, and in health, to loue and to cherishe, til death us departe: according to Goddes holy ordinuance: And thereto I plight thee my trouth.

Then shall they looce handes, and the woman taking again the man by the right hande shall say.

I [N.] take thee [N.] to my wedde husbande, to haue and to holde from this day forwarde, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickenes, and in health, to loue, cherishe, and to obey, till death us departe: accordyng to Goddes holy ordeinaunce: and thereto I giue thee my trouth. Page 79

Then shall they agayne looce theyr handes, and the manne shall geue unto the womanne a ring, and other tokens of spousage, as golde or siluer, laying the same upon the boke: And the Priest taking the ring shall deliuer it unto the man: to puy upon the fowerth finger of the womans left hande. And the man taught by the priest, shall say.

With thys ring I thee wed: Thys golde and siluer I thee geue: with my body I thee wurship: and withal my worldly goodes I thee endoew. In the name of the Father, and of the Sonne, and of the Holy Goste. Amen.

Then the man leauyng the ring upon the fowerth finger of the womans left hande, the minister shal say.

Let us pray. O eternal God creator of al mankinde, geuer of al spiritual grace, the auther of euerlasting life: Sende thy blessing upon these the seruauntes, thys manne and this woman, whome we blesse in thy name, that as Issac an Rebecca (after bracellets and jewels of golde geuen of thone to thother for tokes of their matrmonie) liued faithfullt together; So these persons may surely perfourme and kepe the vowe and couenaunt betwixt them made, wherof the ring geuen, and receiued, is a token and pledge. And may euer remayne in perfite loue and peace together; And lyue accordyng to thy lawes; through Jesus Christe our Lorde. Amen.

Then shall the minister speake unto the people.

Forasmuche as [N]. and [N]. haue consented together in holye wedlocke, and haue witnessed the same here before god and this cupany; and thereto haue geue and pleged theyr trouth eyther to other, an haue declared the same by ioyning of handes: I pronounce that they bee man and wyfe together. In the name of the Father, of the Sonne, and of the Holy Goste. Amen

And the minister shall adde this blessyng.

God the Father blesse you. God the Sonne kepe you: God the Holye Goste lighte your understanding: The Lorde mercifully with his fouour loke upon you, and so fil you with al spiritual benediction, and grace, that you may haue remissio of your sinnes in this life, and in the worlde to come lyfe everlastyng. Amen. Page 80

CEREMONY 38: Bell and Intent

Know now before you go further, that since your lives have crossed in this life you have formed ties between each other. As you seek to enter this state of matrimony you should strive to make real, the ideals which give meaning to both this ceremony and the institution of marriage.

With full awareness, know that within this circle you are not only declaring your intent before your friends and family, but you speak that intent also to your creative higher powers.

The promises made today and the ties that are bound here greatly strengthen your union; they will cross the years and lives of each soul's growth.

Do you still seek to enter this ceremony?

Yes, We Seek to Enter.

In times past it was believed that the human soul shared characteristics with all things divine. It is this belief which assigned virtues to the cardinal directions; East, South, West and North. It is in this tradition that a blessing is offered in support of this ceremony.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the East. Communication of the heart, mind, and body Fresh beginnings with the rising of each Sun. The knowledge of the growth found in the sharing of silences.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the South. Warmth of hearth and home The heat of the heart's passion The light created by both To lighten the darkest of times.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the West. The deep commitments of the lake The swift excitement of the river The refreshing cleansing of the rain The all encompassing passion of the sea.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the North Firm foundation on which to build Fertility of the fields to enrich your lives A stable home to which you may always return.

Each of these blessings from the four cardinal directions emphasizes those things which will help you build a happy and successful union. Yet they are only tools. Tools which you must use together in order to create what you seek in this union.

I bid you look into each others eyes.

[Groom's Name], Will you cause her pain? I May Is that you intent? No

[Bride's Name], Will you cause him pain? I may Is that you intent? No Page 81

*To Both* Will you share each other's pain and seek to ease it? Yes

And so the binding is made. Join your hands *First cord is draped across the bride and grooms hands*

[Bride's Name], Will you share his laughter? Yes

[Groom's Name], Will you share her laughter? Yes

*To Both* Will both of you look for the brightness in life and the positive in each other? Yes

And so the binding is made. *Second chord is draped across the couples hands*

[Bride's Name], Will you burden him? I may Is that you intent? No

[Groom's Name], Will you burden her? I may Is that your intent? No

*To Both* Will you share the burdens of each so that your spirits may grow in this union? Yes

And so the binding is made. *Drape third chord across the couples hands*

[Bride's Name], will you share his dreams? Yes

[Groom's Name], will you share her dreams? Yes

*To Both* Will you dream together to create new realities and hopes? Yes

And so the binding is made. *Drape fourth chord across the couples hands*

[Groom's Name], will you cause her anger? I may Is that you intent? No

[Bride's Name], will you cause him anger? I may Is that your intent? No Page 82

*To Both* Will you take the heat of anger and use it to temper the strength of this union? We Will

And so the binding is made. *Drape fifth chord across the couples hands*

[Bride's Name], Will you honor him? I will

[Groom's Name], Will you honor her? I will

*To Both* Will you seek to never give cause to break that honor? We shall never do so

And so the binding is made. *Drape sixth chord across the couples hands*

*Tie chords together while saying:* The knots of this binding are not formed by these chords but instead by your vows. Either of you may drop the chords, for as always, you hold in your own hands the making of breaking of this union.

*Once chords are tied together they are removed and placed on altar*

As in any relationship there may come a time when argument and disagreement come to be and time being a wonderful healer of anger. I present to you this bell of peace. This bell can be used by either of you should the need ever arise.

The bell to be rang and peace be declared by you both, for a period in time of 10 minutes to be observed, no words, no looks of anger, no actions by either of you.

After the peace period the bell will again be rang and peace will follow.

Do you (Grooms Name) undertake and promise the use of the Peace Bell.

Response: I do.

Do you (Brides Name) undertake and promise to use the Peace Bell.

I therefore present to you both the Bell of Peace, use it wisely and infrequently. Page 83

CEREMONY 39: Hand fasting and Declaration of Intent

Know now before you go further, that since your lives have crossed in this life you have formed ties between each other. As you seek to enter this state of matrimony you should strive to make real, the ideals, which give meaning to both this ceremony and the institution of marriage.

With full awareness, know that within this circle you are not only declaring your intent to be hand fasted before your friends and family, but you speak that intent also to your creative higher powers.

The promises made today and the ties that are bound here greatly strengthen your union; they will cross the years and lives of each soul's growth.

Do you still seek to enter this ceremony?

Yes, We Seek to Enter.

In times past it was believed that the human soul shared characteristics with all things divine. It is this belief which assigned virtues to the cardinal directions; East, South, West and North. It is in this tradition that a blessing is offered in support of this ceremony.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the East. Communication of the heart, mind, and body fresh beginnings with the rising of each Sun. The knowledge of the growth found in the sharing of silences.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the South. warmth of hearth and home the heat of the heart's passion the light created by both to lighten the darkest of times.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the West. the deep commitments of the lake the swift excitement of the river the refreshing cleansing of the rain the all encompassing passion of the sea.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the North a firm foundation on which to build fertility of the fields to enrich your lives a stable home to which you may always return.

Each of these blessings from the four cardinal directions emphasizes those things which will help you build a happy and successful union. Yet they are only tools. Tools, which you must use together in order to create what you seek in this union.

I bid you look into each others eyes.

[Groom's Name], Will you cause her pain? I May Is that your intent? No

[Bride's Name], Will you cause him pain? I may Is that your intent? No Page 84

*To Both* Will you share each other's pain and seek to ease it? Yes

And so the binding is made. Join your hands

*First cord is draped across the bride and grooms hands*

[Bride's Name], Will you share his laughter? Yes

[Groom's Name], Will you share her laughter? Yes

*To Both* Will both of you look for the brightness in life and the positive in each other? Yes

And so the binding is made.

*Second chord is draped across the couples hands*

[Bride's Name], Will you burden him? I may Is that your intent? No

[Groom's Name], Will you burden her? I may Is that your intent? No

*To Both* Will you share the burdens of each so that your spirits may grow in this union? Yes

And so the binding is made.

*Drape third chord across the couples hands*

[Bride's Name], will you share his dreams? Yes

[Groom's Name], will you share her dreams? Yes

*To Both* Will you dream together to create new realities and hopes? Yes

And so the binding is made. Page 85

*Drape fourth chord across the couples hands*

[Groom's Name], will you cause her anger? I may Is that your intent? No

[Bride's Name], will you cause him anger? I may Is that your intent? No

*To Both* Will you take the heat of anger and use it to temper the strength of this union? We Will

And so the binding is made.

*Drape fifth chord across the couples hands*

[Bride's Name], Will you honor him? I will

[Groom's Name], Will you honor her? I will

*To Both* Will you seek to never give cause to break that honor? We shall never do so

And so the binding is made.

*Drape sixth chord across the couples hands*

*Tie chords together while saying:*

The knots of this binding are not formed by these chords but instead by your vows. Either of you may drop the chords, for as always, you hold in your own hands the making of breaking of this union.

*Once chords are tied together they are removed and placed on altar* Page 86

CEREMONY 40: Personal Ceremony

[Minister] (Bride's Name), is it true that you come of your own free will and accord?

[Bride] Yes, it is true.

[Minister] With whom do you come and whose blessings accompany you?

[Father] She comes with me, her father, and is accompanied by all of her family's blessings.

[Minister] Please join hands with your betrothed and listen to that which I am about to say. Above you are the stars, below you are the stones, as time doth pass, remember...

Like a stone should your love be firm, like a star should your love be constant. Let the powers of the mind and of the intellect guide you in your marriage, let the strength of your wills bind you together, let the power of love and desire make you happy, and the strength of your dedication make you inseparable. Be close, but not too close. Possess one another, yet be understanding. Have patience with one another, for storms will come, but they will pass quickly. Be free in giving affection and warmth. Have no fear, for God is with you always.

[Minister] (Groom's Name), I have not the right to bind thee to (Bride's Name), only you have this right. If it be your wish, say so at this time and place your ring in her hand.

[Groom] It is my wish.

[Minister] (Bride's Name), if it be your wish for (Groom's Name) to be bound to you, place the ring on his finger. (Bride's Name),I have not the right to bind thee to (Groom's Name) only you have this right. If it be your wish, say so at this time and place your ring in his hand.

[Bride] It is my wish. Page 87

[Minister] (Groom's Name), if it be your wish for (Bride's Name) to be bound to you, place the ring on her finger.

Groom’s Vows - [Minister]

(Groom's Name), repeat after me: I, (Groom's Full Name), in the name of the spirit of God that resides within us all, By the life that courses within my blood and the love that resides within my heart, I take thee (Bride's Name) to my hand, my heart, and my spirit, to be my chosen one. To desire thee and be desired by thee, to possess thee, and be possessed by thee. I promise to love thee wholly and completely without restraint, in sickness and in health, in plenty and in poverty, in life and beyond, where we shall meet, remember, and love again.

Bride’s Vows -

[Minister]

(Bride's Name), repeat after me : I, (Bride's Full Name), in the name of the spirit of God that resides within us all, By the life that courses within my blood, and the love that resides within my heart, I take thee,(Groom's Name) to my hand, my heart, and my spirit to be my chosen one. To desire and be desired by thee, to possess thee, and be possessed by. I promise to love thee wholly and completely without restraint, In sickness and in health, in plenty and in poverty, in life and beyond, where we shall meet, remember, and love again. Page 88

CEREMONY 41: Rose Ceremony

Inserted at the end of the ceremony before being pronounced husband and wife. A single red rose mean’s "I love you". Giving recognition to the title "Husband and Wife".

"Your gift to each other for your wedding today has been your wedding rings - which shall always be an outward demonstration of your vows of love and respect; and a public showing of your commitment to each other.

You now have what remains the most honorable title which may exist between a man and a woman - the title of "husband" and "wife." For your first gift as husband and wife, that gift will be a single rose.

In the past, the rose was considered a symbol of love and a single rose always meant only one thing - it meant the words "I love you." So it is appropriate that for your first gift - as husband and wife - that gift would be a single rose.

Please exchange your first gift as husband and wife. In some ways it seems like you have not done anything at all. Just a moment ago you were holding one small rose - and now you are holding one small rose. In some ways, a marriage ceremony is like this. In some ways, tomorrow is going to seem no different than yesterday. But in fact today, just now, you both have given and received one of the most valuable and precious gifts of life - one I hope you always remember - the gift of true and abiding love within the devotion of marriage.

_________ and _____________, I would ask that where ever you make your home in the future - whether it be a large and elegant home - or a small and graceful one - that you both pick one very special location for roses; so that on each anniversary of this truly wonderful occasion you both may take a rose to that spot both as a recommitment to your marriage – and a recommitment that THIS will be a marriage based upon love.

In every marriage there are times where it is difficult to find the right words. It is easiest to hurt who we most love. It is easiest to be most hurt by who we most love. It might be difficult some time to words to say "I am sorry" or "I forgive you"; "I need you" or "I am hurting". If this should happen, if you simply can not find these words, leave a rose at that spot which both of you have selected - for that rose than says what matters most of all and should overpower all other things and all other words.

That rose says the words: "I still love you." The other should accept this rose for the words which can not be found, and remember the love and hope that you both share today.

__________ and ________, if there is anything you remember of this marriage ceremony, it is that it was love that brought you here today, it is only love which can make it a glorious union, and it is by love which your marriage shall endure."

Will you (Grooms and Brides Names) Give these roses to each other with love and so doing say after me your true feelings as binding words in marriage.

(Both say to each other) I love you.

I now announce you man and wife, go forward and live with love. Page 89

CEREMONY 42 Full Christian Ceremony

At the day and time appointed for Solemnization of Matrimony, the Persons to be married shall come into the body of the Church, or shall be ready in some proper house, with their friends and neighbors; and there standing together, the groom on the right hand, and the bride on the left, the minister shall say,

DEARLY beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this company, to join together this Man and this Woman in holy Matrimony; which is an honourable estate, instituted of God, signifying unto us the mystical union that is betwixt Christ and his Church: which holy estate Christ adorned and beautified with his presence and first miracle that he wrought in Cana of Galilee, and is commended of Saint Paul to be honourable among all men: and therefore is not by any to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly; but reverently, discreetly, advisedly, soberly, and in the fear of God. Into this holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined. If any man can show just cause, why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter for ever hold his peace.

And also speaking unto the Persons who are to be married, he shall say,

I REQUIRE and charge you both, as ye will answer at the dreadful day of judgment when the secrets of all hearts shall be disclosed, that if either of you know any impediment, why ye may not be lawfully joined together in Matrimony, ye do now confess it. For be ye well assured, that if any persons are joined together other than as God's Word doth allow, their marriage is not lawful.

(Grooms name) Wilt thou have this woman to thy wedded wife, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honour, and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?

The groom shall answer,

I will.

Then shall the Minster say unto the bride,

(Brides name) Wilt thou have this Man to thy wedded husband, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love him, comfort him, honour, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live? Page 90

The bride shall answer,

I will.

Then shall the minister say,

Who giveth this Woman to be married to this Man?

Then shall they give their troth to each other in this manner.

The minister, receiving the bride at her father's or friend's hands, shall cause the groom with his right hand to take the bride by her right hand, and to say after him as followeth.

I (Grooms name) take thee (Brides name) to my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my troth.

Then shall they loose their hands; and the woman with her right hand taking the groom by his right hand, shall likewise say after the minister?

I (Brides name) take thee (Grooms name) to my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I give thee my troth.

Then shall they again loose their hands; and the man shall give unto the woman a ring in this wise: the minister taking the ring shall deliver it unto the man, to put it upon the fourth finger of the woman's left hand. And the man holding the ring there, and taught by the minister, shall say,

With this ring I thee wed: In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.

And, before delivering the ring to the groom, the minister may say as followeth,

BLESS, O Lord, this ring, that he who gives it and she who wears it may abide in thy peace, and continue in they favour, unto their life's end; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Then, the groom, leaving the ring upon the fourth finger of the brides left hand, the minister shall say, Page 91

Let us pray.

Then shall the Minister and People, still standing, say the Lord's Prayer.

OUR Father, who art in heaven, Hallowed be thy Name. Thy Kingdom come. Thy will be done, On Earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, As we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, But deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever and ever. Amen.

Then shall the minister add,

O ETERNAL God, Creator and Preserver of all mankind, Giver of all spiritual grace, the Author of everlasting life; Send thy blessing upon these thy servants, this Man and this Woman, whom we bless in thy Name; that they, living faithfully together, may surely perform and keep the vow and covenant betwixt them made, (whereof this Ring given and received is a token and pledge,) and may ever remain in perfect love and peace together, and live according to thy laws; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Then the Minister may add,

O GOD, who hast so consecrated the state of Matrimony that in it is rep resented the spiritual marriage and unity betwixt Christ and his Church; Look mercifully upon these thy servants, that they may love, honour, and cherish each other, and so live together in faithfulness and patience, in wisdom and true godliness, that their home may be a haven of blessing and of peace; through the same Jesus Christ our Lord, who liveth and reigneth with thee and the Holy Spirit ever, one God, world without end. Amen.

Then shall the Minister join their right hands together, and say,

Those whom God hath joined together let no man put asunder.

Then shall the Minister speak unto the company.

For as much as (Grooms name) and (Brides name) have consented together in holy wedlock, and have witnessed the same before God and this company, and thereto have given and pledged their troth, each to the other, and have declared the same by giving and receiving a Ring, and by joining hands; I pronounce that they are Man and Wife, In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.

The groom and the bride kneeling, the minister shall add this Blessing.

GOD the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Ghost, bless, preserve, and keep you; the Lord mercifully with his favour look upon you, and fill you with all spiritual benediction and grace; that ye may so live together in this life, that in the world to come ye may have life everlasting. Amen.

Present to all Mr. And Mrs. (names to be added). Page 92

CEREMONY 43 Short Christian

[Minister] [Grooms name], understanding as you do the heart and mind of God concerning marriage do you now promise before the Lord and those gathered here that you will take [Brides name] to be your wife, that you will live together with her always, and be faithful to her until the Lord separates you through death or his return?

I promise

[Minister] [Brides name], understanding as you do the heart and mind of God concerning marriage do you now promise before the Lord and those gathered here that you will take [Grooms name] to be your husband, that you will live together with him always, and be faithful to him until the Lord separates you through death or his return?

I promise.

[Minister] Do you, their family and friends, promise your support and encouragement to the commitment that [Grooms name] and [Brides name] are making to one another here today? If so, would each of you please respond by saying I promise?

I promise

VOWS

I, [Grooms name], take you, [Brides name] to be my wife. I will speak the truth to you in Love. I will encourage you and strengthen you in your walk with God. I will not let the sun go down on my anger, instead I will be gracious, tender-hearted, and forgiving even as God has forgiven me. I will be peaceful, content and joyful in every situation we encounter knowing that God is at work.

I, [Brides name], take you, [Grooms name] to be my husband. I will speak the truth to you in Love. I will encourage you and strengthen you in your walk with God. I will not let the sun go down on my anger, instead I will be gracious, tender-hearted, and forgiving even as God has forgiven me. I will be peaceful, content and joyful in every situation we encounter knowing that God is at work. Page 93

CEREMONY 44 Union of hearts

Minister: We are gathered today to unite [Grooms and Brides name] in marriage. This celebration is but an outward sign of an inward union of heart, mind and spirit. This is a celebration of the joining of two souls already attuned to each other. When such a true bond already exists between a man and a woman, it is fitting that an outer acknowledgment be made. We are here to bear witness to the entry into the closer relationship of husband and wife of these beloved friends who are already one in spirit.

Minister: Who gives this women to be married to this man?

Father: Her Mother and I do.

Minister: [Grooms name and Brides name], it is this day you take a giant step of courage and commitment to love, understand and grow. When a commitment this strong is made by two people, the force of that commitment, of that love, of that courage, reaches out and touches all of us around you, so that our lives are changed and we share a part of your love. Like a stone dropped in a still pond, the ripples of the love from this celebration extend and change the world we live in.

You are now taking into your care and keeping the happiness of the one person in all the world whom you love best. You are adding to your life not only the affection of each other, but also the companionship and blessing of a deep trust as well. You are agreeing to share strength, responsibilities and to share love.

In our long history we have never discovered a better way of life than sharing it together in love in a lasting and responsible way. This arrangement seems to meet our deepest human needs for love and companionship, for someone with whom we can share in an intimate and trusting way all the hopes and joy and dreams of life. But real love, _______ and ________ is something beyond the warmth and glow, the excitement and romance of being deeply in love. It is caring as much about the welfare and happiness of your life partner as about your own. Real love is not total absorption into each other, it is looking outward in the same direction together. Love makes burdens lighter because you divide them. It makes joys more intense because you share them. It makes you stronger, so you can be involved with life in ways you dare not risk alone.

Jesus was once asked, "What is the greatest law that mankind must follow?" And he answered them by saying that “we must love God with all our hearts, and love our neighbors as we love ourselves." Jesus touched upon something we all feel very deeply in our hearts, that love is the greatest gift that we can offer to one another. That is what makes marriage so very special, and a cause for joy and celebration for all of us who have come here today to share in this event. It is my personal hope and prayer that those of you who have already taken the vows of marriage will witness the love of these two people, and as you listen to them share their vows, perhaps it will strengthen for you the memory of your happy day, and remind you of the meaning of the vows you yourselves once took. Perhaps it will even strengthen just a little bit the bond of love that have been growing between you, and if any of this should happen, it would certainly be the greatest gift that ______ and _______l could offer all of us on their wedding day. Page 94

Minister: [Grooms and Brides names], please face each other and take each other’s hands.

Minister: [Grooms name], do you take this woman to be your wedded wife? Do you promise before God and this company that you will love her, honor her, comfort and keep her in sickness and in health and that forsaking all others for her alone will you perform unto her all of the duties and respect that a husband graciously bestows upon his wife?

Groom: I do.

Minister: [Brides name], do you take this man to be your wedded husband? Do you promise before God and this company that you will love him, honor him, comfort and keep him in sickness and in health and that forsaking all others for him alone will you perform unto him all of the duties and respect that a wife graciously bestows upon her husband?

Bride: I do.

Minister: [Grooms name] please repeat after me as you enter in the covenant of Marriage:

Minister: I, [Grooms name] take you [Brides name] to be my wife, I will cherish our friendship and love you today, tomorrow and forever, I will trust you and honor you I will love you faithfully through the best and the worst what may come I will always be there I come into this union letting go of my deepest fears and embracing all my faith and if I doubt I will remember this time and why we came together this day As I have given you my hands to hold so I give you my life to keep so help me God.

Minister: [Brides name] please repeat after me as you enter in the covenant of Marriage.

Minister: I, [Brides name] take you [Grooms name] to be my husband I will cherish our friendship and love you today, tomorrow and forever I will trust you and honor you I will love you faithfully through the best and the worst what may come I will always be there I come into this union letting go of my deepest fears and embracing all my faith and if I doubt I will remember this time and why we came together this day As I have given you my hands to hold so I give you my life to keep so help me God. Page 95

Minister: May I have the rings, please?

Minister: [Groom and Brides name], as these rings are designed without an ending, they speak of eternity. May the incorruptible substance of these rings represent a love glowing with increasing luster through the years. May God bless these rings which you give to each other as the sign of your eternal love, trust, and faithfulness. May their inscription always be a reminder of the way you feel this day, that only God could love you more that you love each other.

Minister: [Grooms name], take [Brides name] ring, and as you place it on her finger and bind her to yourself, repeat after me.

Minister: [Brides name], my love: With this ring, I thee wed, and say to the world “This is my wife, whom I cherish above all others.” In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost, Amen.

Minister: [Brides name], take [Grooms name] ring, and as you place it on his finger and bind him to yourself, repeat after me.

Minister: [Grooms name], my love: With this ring, I thee wed, and say to the world “This is my husband, whom I cherish above all others.” In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost, Amen.

Minister: Please join me in prayer.

Father, our hearts are filled with great happiness. This [Groom and Brides name] wedding day. They come before you, pledging their lives and their hearts to one another. Grant that they may be ever true and loving, living together in such a way as to never bring heartache into their marriage. Temper their hearts with kindness and help them to be sweethearts, helpmates, friend and guide, and together, may they meet the cares and problems of life more bravely. Let them remember the value of each other as individuals, and never take each other for granted. And as time takes away their youthful charm, may they find contentment in the greater joys of rich companionship. May their home truly be a place of love and harmony where your Spirit is ever present. Bless their wedding day, we pray, and walk beside them, through all their life together. May their love continue through life and finally blend into the life eternal. Amen.

Now that you have joined yourselves in holy matrimony, may you strive always to meet this commitment with the same spirit you now exhibit. We all bear witness to this ceremony you have just performed, and you are now Husband and Wife. May God bless this union. [Grooms name], you may kiss your bride.

Minister: Ladies and Gentlemen, I take great pleasure in presenting to you Mr. and Mrs. [Grooms last name] Page 96

CEREMONY 45 These are the hands

Bride's name], please face [Groom's name], and hold his hands, palms up, so you may see the gift that they are to you.

These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and vibrant with love, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as he promises to love you all the days of his life.

These are the hands that will work along side yours, as together you build your future, as you laugh and cry, as you share your innermost secrets and dreams.

These are the hands you will place with expectant joy against your stomach, until he too, feels his child stir within you.

These are the hands that look so large and strong, yet will be so gentle as he holds your baby for the first time.

These are the hands that will work long hours for you and your new family

These are that hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the

years, for a lifetime of happiness.

These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes: tears of sorrow and tears of joy.

These are the hands that will comfort you in illness, and hold you when fear or grief wrack your mind.

These are the hands that will tenderly lift your chin and brush your cheek as they raise your face to look into his eyes: eyes that are filled completely with his overwhelming love and desire for you.

[Groom's name], please hold [Bride's name]’s hands, palms up, where you may see the gift that they are to you.

These are the hands of your best friend, smooth, young and carefree, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as she pledges her love and commitment to you all the days of her life.

These are the hands that will hold each child in tender love, soothing them through illness and hurt, supporting and encouraging them along the way, and knowing when it is time to let go

These are the hands that will massage tension from you neck and back in the evenings after you’ve both had a long hard day. Page 97

These are the hands that will hold you tight as you struggle through difficult times

These are the hands that will comfort you when you are sick, or console you when you are grieving.

They are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, for a lifetime of happiness.

These are the hands that will hold you in joy and excitement and hope, each time she tells you that you are to have another child, that together you have created a new life.

These are the hands that will give you support as she encourages you to chase down your dreams. Together as a team, everything you wish for can be realized. Minister:

God, bless these hands that you see before you this day. May they always be held by one another. Give them the strength to hold on during the storms of stress and the dark of disillusionment. Keep them tender and gentle as they nurture each other in their wondrous love. Help these hands to continue building a relationship founded in your grace, rich in caring, and devoted in reaching for your perfection.

May [Groom's name] and [Bride's name] see their four hands as healer, protector, shelter and guide. We ask this in your name,.

Amen. Page 98

CEREMONY 46

Every wedding ceremony at which a clergyman, a rabbi or a celebrant, officiates is of course, of a marriage, which already exists. This ceremony gives social recognition to a union, which has already taken place in the hearts of [Groom and Brides name].

It is [Groom and Brides name]'s wish at this time to declare their marriage partnership to the world. It is a statement of commitment to each other and to ideals they already have.

[Groom and Brides name] believe marriage is founded on the sort of sincerity and understanding, which leads to tolerance, confidence and trust. They feel it involves respect for each other's individuality and that most difficult of tasks, the acceptance of each other's weaknesses prejudices and faults. They believe too that those qualities, which have attracted them to each other and brought them here today, can be best developed during a life spent together.

A happy marriage, they both know, will enable them to establish a home, with love and stability, where family and friends will always be welcome and which will be a base from which the influence of their shared and we hope strengthened life today, can extend.

READING

Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created. In the art of marriage, the little things are the big things.

It is never being too old to hold hands.

It is remembering to say, "I love you".

It is at no time taking the other for granted.

It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives; it is standing together facing the world.

It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. It is not expecting perfection in each other.

It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding, and a sense of humor.

It is having a capacity to forgive and forget. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, the dependence is mutual, and the obligation is reciprocal.

It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

It is not marrying the right partner; it is being the right partner.

It is discovering that your love for one another at its best will never lose sight of or be blotted out by the commonplace experiences of life. Page 99

VOWS

Minister: Marriage is not a legal document. No pastor or priest or justice of the peace can create a marriage because a marriage, truly, is nothing except the promises made and kept by two individuals. Today [Groom and Brides name] stand before us to publicly declare their love and to share with us their marriage promises.

Minister: [Grooms name], what promises do you make?

[Grooms name]: I promise to love [Brides name] with all my heart and mind and strength. I promise to be faithful to her in thought, word and act for all the days of my life. I promise to consider her welfare and happiness before I make any decisions and I promise to offer her comfort, encouragement and companionship.

Minister: [Brides name], what promises do you make?

[Brides name]: I promise to love [Grooms name] with all my heart and mind and strength. I promise to be faithful to him in thought, word and act for all the days of my life. I promise to consider his welfare and happiness before I make any decisions and I promise to offer him comfort, encouragement and companionship.

Minister: Do you both, before these witnesses, pledge to do all in your power to make this a happy and enduring union?

Together Bride and Groom say: We do

RING VOWS

[Brides name], with this ring I thee wed. I hope you will wear it as a reminder that I love you every single day of your life.

[Grooms name], with this ring I thee wed. I hope you will wear it as a reminder that I love you every single day of your life. Page 100

You have declared before all of us that you will live together in marriage. You have made special promises to each other, which have been symbolized by the joining of hands, the taking of vows and the giving and receiving of two rings.

By the authority vested in me, I now pronounce you to be Husband and Wife.

You may seal your promises with a kiss.

Bride and Groom, never forget the beginning of your love for one another, take care of it, nurture it, and allow it to grow strong and firm in the years that are to come. Always concentrate on making each other feel happy and secure in your commitment to one another. Always rely on your ability to keep the promises you have made to one another today and always love one another.

(Champagne Toast)

Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you Mr. and Mrs. [Groom and Brides name].

Ceremony written for and by; Brian Keith Foster and Holly Beth Sussman Page 101

CEREMONY 47 (Sand Ceremony)

This is a full in-depth Sand Ceremony and is best if you use different coloured sand. Generally coloured sand can be obtained in Craft or Hobby shops. Please note that this Sand Ceremony can be incorporated into any of the ceremonies.

And now, let us participate in another symbolic act. Life is full of many actions that speak to us of a deeper meaning that we cannot always put into words. In addition to your stated vows, you have used ancient symbols in this wedding service—the exchange of rings, the clasping of hands, the bearing of flowers. By doing these things you act, instead of speak, to show your promises to each other.

In marriage, God calls upon a man and a woman to leave their parents to join one another in love, and become one in flesh. Each of your parents has poured different colored sand into a vessel. In a moment, each of you will take a vessel of sand and together you will pour the sand from your vessel into the larger one. The sand from each individual vessel will then intermingle together. This is a vivid reminder that in marriage our lives are also merged, even as we remain individuals.

[Groom and Brides name], you have sealed your relationship by the giving and receiving of rings. This symbolic act that you do now is another pledge between two people who commit themselves to one another for the rest of their lives. The most beautiful example of this kind of partnership is the marriage relationship. You have committed here today, by your vows and these symbolic acts, to share the rest of your lives with each other. Now this relationship is further symbolized through the pouring of these two vessels of sand, one representing you [Grooms name], and all that you were, all that you are, all that you will ever be, and the other you [Brides name], all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be.

I ask now that you each take a vessel of sand and pour it into the center larger vessel. As the sand intermingles together, it will further symbolize the union of your two lives. As the two vessels of sand are poured into the larger one, the individual vessels no longer exist, but are joined together as one. Just as these grains of sand can never be separated and poured into individual vessels, so are you two joined as one. The individual lives that each of you experienced until now, will hereafter be inseparably united, for the two of you shall become one. Page 102

CEREMONY 48 (Jewish Breaking of the glass.)

Even in times of great joy, we reserve a moment to mourn the destruction of the Temple, without which our lives are incomplete.

We should remember the fragility of relationships.

The loud noise frightens away evil spirits that threaten to steal the souls of the joyous couple.

It is the last time the groom gets to put his foot down!

This marks the conclusion of the ceremony. With shouts of Mazel Tov, the chatan and kallah are then given an enthusiastic reception from the guests as they leave the chupah together and head toward the Yichud room, their temporary private chamber.

HEBREW WEDDING PRAYER

Blessed art thou, O Lord our God, King of the universe, who hath created joy and gladness, bridegroom and bride, mirth and exultation, pleasure and delight, love and brotherhood, peace and friendship. May there soon be heard in the cities of Judah, and in the streets of Jerusalem, the voice of joy and gladness, the voice of the bridegroom and the voice of the bride, the jubilant voice of bridegrooms from the wedding canopy, and of youths from their feasts of song. Blessed art thou, O Lord, who gives the Bridegroom joy in his bride.

READING from the Talmut: (Ketubot 8)

Blessed art though, O Lord, King of the Universe, who created mirth and joy, bridegroom and bride, gladness, jubilation, dancing, and delight, love and brotherhood, peace and fellowship. Quickly, O Lord our God, may the sound of mirth and joy be heard in the streets of Judah and Jerusalem, the voice of bridegroom and bride, jubilant voices of bridegrooms from their canopies and youths from the feasts of song. Blessed art though, O Lord, who makes the bridegroom rejoice with the bride. Page 103

SEVEN BENEDICTIONS

Blessed art Thou, O lord our God, King of the Universe who hast created the fruit of the vine. Blessed art Thou, O lord our God, King of the Universe who has created all things for His glory. Blessed art Thou, O lord our God, King of the Universe, creator of man. Blessed art Thou, O lord our God, King of the Universe who hast made man in his image, after his likeness, and hast prepared for him out of his very self, a perpetual fabric. Blessed art Thou, O Lord, creator of man. May she who was barren be exceedingly glad and rejoice when her children are united in her midst in joy. Blessed art Thou, O Lord, who makes Zion joyful through her children. O Lord, make these beloved companions greatly rejoice even as Thou didst rejoice at Thy creation in the Garden of Eden as of old. Blessed art Thou, O Lord, who makest bridegroom and bride to rejoice. Blessed art Thou, O lord our God, King of the Universe, who has created joy and gladness, bridegroom and bride, mirth and exultation, pleasure and delight, love, brotherhood, peace and fellowship. Soon may there be heard in the cities of Judah and in the streets of Jerusalem, the voice of joy and gladness, the voice of the bridegroom and the voice of the bride, the jubilant voice of the bridegrooms from the canopies, and of youths from their feasts of song. Blessed art Thou, O Lord who makest the bridegroom to rejoice with the bride.

THE SEVEN BLESSINGS "The New Jewish Wedding" By Anita Diamant

We acknowledge the Unity of all within the sovereignty of God, expressing our appreciation for this wine, symbol and aid of our rejoicing.

We acknowledge the Unity of all within the sovereignty of God, realizing that each separate moment and every distinct object points to and shares in this oneness.

We acknowledge the Unity of all within the sovereignty of God, recognizing and appreciating the blessing of being human.

We acknowledge the Unity of all within the sovereignty of God, realizing the special gift of awareness that permits us to perceive this unity and the wonder we experience as a man and a woman joined to live together.

May rejoicing resound throughout the world as the homeless are given homes, persecution and oppression cease, and all people learn to live in peace with each other and in harmony with their environment.

From the Divine, source of all energy, we call forth an abundance of love to envelop this couple. May they be for each other lovers and friends, and may their love partake of the same innocence, purity, and sense of discovery that we imagine the first couple to have experienced. Page 104

We acknowledge the Unity of all within the sovereignty of God, and we highlight today joy and gladness, bridegroom and bride, delight and cheer, love and harmony, peace and companionship. May we all witness the day when the dominant sounds through the world will be these sounds of happiness, the voices of lovers, the sounds of feasting and singing.

Praised is love; blessed be this marriage. May the bride and bridegroom rejoice together.

BREAKING OF THE GLASS

The breaking of the glass at the end of a wedding ceremony serves to remind us of two very important aspects of a marriage.

The Bride and Groom and everyone should consider these marriage vows as permanent and final as the breaking of this glass is unchangeable.

But, the breaking of the glass is also a warning of the fragility of a marriage. That sometimes a single thoughtless act, breech of trust or infidelity can damage a marriage in ways that are very difficult to undo - just as it would be so difficult to undo the breaking of the glass.

Knowing that this marriage is permanent, the Bride and Groom should strive to show each other the love and respect befitting their spouse and love of their life.

All shout: Mazeltov!

SECOND VERSION

The final act of this ceremony is the shattering of the glass. This old custom has many traditions, with many interpretations. At one time it was meant to scare off demons who frequent celebrations. It was also meant to remind us on a happy occasion like this that the world is full of less fortunate people. It also reminds us of the destruction of the Temples in ancient Jerusalem. It also reminds us that it is our task to help repair this shattered world.

All shout: Mazeltov! Page 105

THIRD VERSION

The breaking of the glass at the end of a wedding ceremony serves to remind us of two very important aspects of a marriage.

The Bride and Groom and everyone should consider these marriage vows as permanent and final as the breaking of this glass is unchangeable.

But, the breaking of the glass is also a warning of the fragility of a marriage. That sometimes a single thoughtless act, breech of trust or infidelity can damage a marriage in ways that are very difficult to undo - just as it would be so difficult to undo the breaking of the glass.

Knowing that this marriage is permanent, the Bride and Groom should strive to show each other the love and respect befitting their spouse and love of their life.

All shout: Mazeltov!!

FOURTH VERSION

The final act of this ceremony is the shattering of the glass. This old custom has many traditions, with many interpretations. At one time it was meant to scare off demons who frequent celebrations. It was also meant to remind us on a happy occasion like this that the world is full of less fortunate people. It also reminds us of the destruction of the Temples in ancient Jerusalem. It also reminds us that it is our task to help repair this shattered world.

(Light bulb or wine glass wrapped in a cloth – Groom smashes it)

All shout: Mazeltov! Page 106

CEREMONY 49 (Bread and Wine Sharing)

BREAD SHARING

The sharing of bread, can offer blessing to the wedding couple. Bread made at the hearth, or in the centre of the house represents home and family.

Bread more importantly symbolises the mystery of transformation as the grain in the bread is for nurturing or sustenance. For the reason bread is an appropriate symbol of the transition of the “I” status that take place when people marry. There are many ways that bread can be incorporated into the a wedding ceremony.

For example, in one small wedding the bread ceremony followed by a wine blessing or sharing.

After everyone in the circle had a shared a cup of wine, the minister says, “ Bread symbolises life, the food of the body and the soul. It is also a symbol of union as having many grains in one substance and when broken and shared represents shared and united life. Your parents gave you life, and now we are asking them to give you a blessing in your new life together."

At this point both sets of parents came forward. Together, the couple held a warm round bread. The parents all placed their hands over their children's and over the bread. Each parent gave a blessing they had previously prepared.

The bride and groom then fed a bit of the bread to each other and to their parents.

This was a good way to have the parents participate in the ceremony so that they could symbolically let go of their beloved child with a full and sincere blessing.

THE WEDDING CAKE

The tradition of the wedding cake, too, derives originally from the symbolic use of bread as part of the wedding ceremony According to Bride's Book of Etiquette, "the ancient Romans broke a thin loaf over the bride's head at the end of the ceremony The wheat from which it was made was a symbol of fertility and the crumbs were eagerly sought by the guests as good luck tokens." For the English in the Middle Ages, "it was traditional for the bride and groom to kiss over a pile of small cakes.

When an enterprising baker decided to mass all these cakes together and cover them with frosting, the modern tiered wedding cake was born." One old custom which can be used creatively today is the baking of trinkets into the cake. "A code integrated into the icing can tell where the trinkets are in the cake, so they can be served to the wedding party: A wishbone for luck, a heart for romance, a ring for the next to marry, a gold or silver coin for good fortune. Page 107

THE SHARING OF FOOD AND WINE

Christian ceremonies share with Jewish, pagan, and many other traditions a number of the same symbols. Among these are the ritual use of bread and wine. It is quite common for a ceremony to end with feasting. Coming from the word festival, feasting is a natural form of celebration. In many cultures an abundant flow of wine is an accustomed feature of the festivities. However, the use of wine and bread within body of the ritual has a somewhat different significance.

WINE SHARING

Wine symbolizes blood and sacrifice, and therefore represents life-force and vitality. As a form of spirits, wine equates with fire, a masculine principle. Water, on the other hand, is associated with the feminine or the mother, as all life comes from the waters.

As such, it also symbolizes potential. Wine and/or water can be shared during a ceremony. They can be used in blessing. Or water can be used for purifying. In any usage, the symbolic significance should be kept in mind. For example, in one ceremony water and wine were sequentially poured into a chalice and stated that water and wine are liquids represent the moon and the sun and all the complementary opposites in the universe. As you share water or wine from the same cup, you can both drink in the feminine or receptive qualities. And as you both take wine from this cup, you can take in the masculine qualities." The remaining liquid was poured onto the earth for the ancestors, who were acknowledged and asked for blessing. Page 108

WINE SHARING CEREMONY:

(Grooms and Brides name) have chosen to include a spiritual ritual within this ceremony, the sharing of water and wine. This ritual symbolises their union together and acknowledges their ancestors and their connection with the land.

Wine symbolises blood and sacrifice and therefore represents life-force and vitality, the masculine principle. Water on the other hand is associated with the feminine or the mother, as all life comes from the waters. As you share this liquid from the one cup you are drinking in both the masculine and feminine qualities. Then as you pour the remaining mixture onto the earth you are acknowledging your ancestors.

Minister please note: The wine and water that is poured into a chalice, allow the couple to drink from the chalice. Afterwards anything left of the wine and water mixture is poured onto the earth.

(Let the symbolism speak more than words here as this is what people will take in more than words that are spoken) Page 109

CEREMONY 50

SQUARE DANCE WEDDING CEREMONY and VOWS

Dear Friends:

We are gathered here to join together. (Grooms Name) and (Brides Name) in an honorable union which will exist between these two Square Dancers.

And now if any person can show just cause why they may not become members of your square, let them speak now or forever after hold their place in the square.

(Grooms Name), wilt thou have this woman to be your dancing partner, to swing together, do sa do with, and wilt thou honor her in squares, and forsaking all others, promenade her around the ring, and keep her as your square and round dance partner as long as ye both shall live? (wait for an answer)

(Brides Name), wilt thou have this man to be your dancing partner, to swing together, do sa do with, and wilt thou honor him in squares, and forsaking all others, promenade with him and keep him straight in your square and round dances as partners for as long as ye both shall live? (wait for an answer) (Grooms Name), repeat after me:

VOWS

I, (Grooms Name) , take thee (Brides Name), to be my partner in square dancing and round dancing, to have and to hold and promenade with until our square falls apart. (Brides Name) repeat after me.

I, (Brides Name), take thee (Grooms Name), to be my partner in square and round dancing, to have and to hold and promenade with until our square falls apart.

For as much as (Grooms Name) and (Brides Name) have consented together, their pledge and faith to each other for square and round dancing and in witness of these dancers, Callers, and Cuers, by the power vested in me by Callerlab (or Roundalab), I now pronounce you square dance partners from this day forward. and may you produce enough dancers for your own square. Page 110

READINGS

READING 1 Everyday you live

Everyday you live, learn how to receive love with as much understanding

as you give it.

Find things within yourself, then you can share them with each other.

Do not fear this love.

Have an open heart and a sincere mind.

Be sincerely interested in each other’s happiness.

Be constant and consistent in your love.

From this comes security and strength.

All that we love deeply becomes a part of us on this day of your marriage.

Try to commit yourselves fully and freely to each other.

Walter Pinder

READING 2 1 Corinthians 13 (Shortened version)

Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous.

Love is never boastful or conceited, it is never rude or selfish, it does not

take offense and is not resentful.

Love takes no pleasure in other people’s faults, but delights in the truth.

It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope. It is always ready to endure

whatever comes. True love does not come to an end.

READING 3 Remember the word of Kahlil Gibran:

Love one another, but make not a bond of love.

Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of our souls.

Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,

even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same

music. Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping, for only the

hand of life can contain your hearts.

Stand together but not too near together. For the pillars of the temple

stand apart and the oak and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow. Page 111

READING 4 Marriage is love

If two are caring as they are sharing life’s hopes and fears.

If the music of laughter outweighs sadness and tears.

Marriage is togetherness.

If both derive pleasure from the mere presence of each other,

yet when parted no jealousies restrict, worry or smother.

Marriage is freedom.

If achievements mean more when they benefit two

and consideration is shown with each point of view.

Marriage is respect.

And if togetherness, freedom and respect are combined

with a joy that words can never fully define, then

Marriage is love.

Gloria Matthew

READING 5 Love is the reason

Love is the reason why this day was chosen by you both to begin your

lives together and love is the reason why you both will give with all hearts

for the good of each other.

Love is the reason that together you will become one; one in hope; one in

believing in life; one in sharing the coming years.

READING 6 Two Lives

Two lives, two people, so very different, yet so similar.

Together we stand as one, sharing our future as it comes.

The past is that -- past.

Buds are yet to blossom, with care and trust, the best is yet to be revealed.

Honesty and kindness, are the fruits of love.

Lord bless this day and always to enrich us so our love will never end. Page 112

READING 7 1 Corinthians 13

Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not

charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.

And though I have the gift of prophecy, and all knowledge; and though I

have all faith so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am

nothing.

And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my

body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth

not itself, is not puffed up,

Doth not behave itself unseemly; seeketh not her own, is not easily

provoked, thinketh no evil;

Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;

Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all

things.

Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail;

whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it

shall vanish away.

For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.

But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be

done away.

When I was a child I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as

a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

For now we see through a glass darkly; but then face to face: now I know

in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

And now abideth, faith, hope, charity, and the greatest of these is charity.

READING 8 Colossians 3:12-14

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and loved, compassion, kindness,

lowliness, meekness, and patience, fore bearing one another, and, if one

has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has

forgiven you, so you must also forgive. And bore all, put on love, which

binds everything together in perfect harmony. Page 113

READING 9 Sonnet 116

Let me not to the marriage of true minds.

Admit impediments; love is not love.

Which alters when it alteration finds.

Or bends with the remover to remove.

Oh no! It is an ever-fixed mark.

That looks on tempests and is never shaken.

It is the star to every wand'ring bark,

Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.

Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks

Within his bending sickle's compass come;

Love alters not with its brief hours and weeks,

But bears it out even to the edge of doom.

If this be error and upon me proved,

I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

William Shakespeare

READING 10 There we are one

When I go to the place in me that is Love

And you go into that place in you that is Love

There we are ONE. Page 114

READING 11 In Love Made Visible

In love are we made visible

As in a magic bath

are unpeeled

to the sharp pit

so long concealed

With love's alertness

we recognize the soundless whimper

of the soul behind the eyes

A shaft opens, and the timid thing

at last leaps to surface with full-spread wing

The fingertips of love discover more than the body's smoothness

They uncover a hidden conduit

for the transfusion

of empathy’s that circumvent

the mind's intrusion

In love are we set free

Objective bone

and flesh no longer insulate us

to ourselves alone

We are released

and flow into each other's cup

Our two frail vials pierced

drink each other up

May Swenson Page 115 would top pines or redwoods, live by their vision's harmony

READING 12 A Vision

Two angels among the throng of angels

paused in the upward abyss, facing angel to angel.

Blue and green glowed the wing feathers

of one angel, from red to gold the sheen

of the other's.

These two, so far as angels may dispute, were poised

on the brink of dispute, brink of fall from angelic stature,

for these tall ones, angels whose wingspan encompasses entire

earthly villages, whose heads if their feet touched earth

which sees at one glance the dark and light of the moon.

These two hovered dazed before one another,

for one saw the sea feathered, peacock breakered

crests of the other angel's magnificence, different from his own,

and the other's eyes flickered with vision of

flame petallings, cream-gold grainfeather glitterings,

the wings of his fellow, and both in immortal danger of dwindling,

of dropping into the remote forms of a lesser being.

But as these angels, the only halted ones

among the many who passed and repassed,

trod air as swimmers tread water, each gazing on the angelic wings of

the other, the intelligence proper to great angels flew into their wings,

the intelligence called intellectual love, which,

understanding the perfection’s of scarlet,

leapt up among blues and greens strong shafted,

and among amber down illumined the sapphire bloom,

so that each angel was iridescent with the strange newly-seen

hues he watched; and their discovering pause

and the speech their silent interchange of perfection was

never became a shrinking to opposites,

and they remained free in the heavenly chasm,

remained angels, but dreaming angels,

each imbued with the mysteries of the other.

Denise Levertov Page 116

READING 13 The Passionate Shepherd to His Love

Come live with me and be my love, And we will all the pleasures prove

That valleys, groves, hills, and fields, woods, or steepy mountain yields.

And we will sit upon the rocks, Seeing the shepherds feed their flocks,

By shallow rivers to whose falls Melodious birds sing madrigals.

And I will make thee beds of roses And a thousand fragrant posies,

A cap of flowers, and a kirtle Embroidered all with leaves of myrtle;

A gown made of the finest wool Which from our pretty lambs we pull;

Fair lined slippers for the cold, With buckles of the purest gold;

A belt of straw and ivy buds, With coral clasps and amber studs:

And if these pleasures may thee move, Come live with me,

and be my love.

The shepherds' swains shall dance and sing For thy delight each

May morning: If these delights thy mind may move, Then live with me

and be my love.

Christopher Marlowe

READING 14 From Sonnets from the Portuguese

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My soul can reach,

when feeling out of sight

For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.

I love thee to the level of every day's Most quiet need, by sun and

candle-light. I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;

I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.

I love thee with the passion put to use

In my old grief’s, and with my childhood's faith.

I love thee with a love I seemed to lose

With my lost saints I love thee with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my

life!-and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning Page 117

READING 15 The Ivy Crown

The whole process is a lie, unless, crowned by excess,

it break forcefully, one way or another, from its confinement—

or find a deeper well

Anthony and Cleopatra were right;

they have shown the way. I love you or I do not live at all.

Daffodil time is past. This is summer, summer!

the heart says, and not even the full of it. No doubts are permitted-

though they will come and may before our time overwhelm us.

We are only mortal but being mortal can defy our fate.

We may by an outside chance even win!

We do not look to see jonquils and violets come again

but there are, still, the roses!

Romance has no part in it. The business of love is

cruelty which, by our wills, we transform

to live together. It has its seasons, for and against,

whatever the heart fumbles in the dark to assert toward the end of May.

Just as the nature of briars is to tear flesh, I have proceeded.

Keep the briars out, they say. You cannot live and keep free of briars.

Children pick flowers.

Let them.

Though having them in hand they have no further use for them

but leave them crumpled it the curb's edge.

At our age the imagination across the sorry facts

lifts us to make roses stand before thorns.

Sure love is cruel and selfish and totally obtuse-

at least, blinded by the light, young love is.

But we are older, I to love and you to be loved,

we have, no matter how,

by our wills survived to keep the jeweled prize

always at our finger tips. We will it so and so it is

past, all accident.

William Carlos Williams Page 118

READING 16 The Lord's Prayer: Traditional Version

Our Father which art in Heaven,

Hallowed be thy name,

Thy kingdom come,

Thy will be done on earth

As it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread

And forgive us our trespasses

As we forgive those who trespass against us.

Lead us not into temptation

But deliver us from evil.

For thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory,

For ever and ever.

Amen.

READING 17 The Lords Prayer Modern Version

Our Father in heaven,

Holy be your name.

Your kingdom come,

Your will be done on earth as in heaven.

Give us today our daily bread.

Forgive our sins

As we forgive those who sin against us.

Save us at the time of trial

And deliver us from evil.

For the kingdom, the power and the glory

Are yours now and ever more.

Amen.

READING 18 The Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste

And remember what peace there may be in silence.

Be yourself, especially do not feign affection.

Neither be cynical about love, for in the face of all aridity

and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.

Be gentle with yourselves.

You are the children of the universe

No less than the trees and stars.

Be at peace with God

Whatever you conceive Him to be

And whatever your labors and aspirations.

In the noisy confusion of life

Keep peace with your souls. Page 119

READING 19 Blessing

All praise and blessing to you, God of love,

Creator of the universe,

Maker of man and woman in your likeness,

Source of blessing for married life.

All praise to you, for you have created

Courtship and marriage,

Joy and gladness,

Feasting and laughter,

Pleasure and delight.

May your blessing come in full upon

(Groom’s Name) and (Bride’s Name)

May they know your presence in their joys and sorrows.

May they reach old age in the company of friends

And come at last to your eternal kingdom.

Amen.

READING 20 A Reading from the New Testament

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 and 13, J.B. Philips translation

Love is slow to lose patience... It looks for a way of being constructive.

It is not possessive... It is neither anxious to impress, nor does it cherish

inflated ideas of its own importance.

Love has good manners, and does not pursue selfish advantage. It is not

touchy... It does not keep account of evil, or gloat over the wickedness of

other people.

On the contrary, it is glad when truth prevails.

Love knows no limits to its endurance, no end to its trust, no fading of its

hope.

It can outlast anything. It is in fact the one thing that still stands when all

else is fallen.

In this life we have three great lasting qualities: faith, hope and love...

But the greatest is love. Page 120

READING 21 The Prophet (fuller Version)

Then Almitra spoke again and said:

And what of marriage, master?

And he answered, saying:

You were born together, and together you shall be for evermore,

Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God,

But let there be spaces in your togetherness, and let the winds of heaven

dance between you. Love one another, but make not a bond of love;

Let it rather be a moving sea between the shore of your souls.

Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup,

Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf,

Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,

Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the

same music.

Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping,

For only the hand of Life can control your hearts;

And stand together yet not too near together,

For the pillars of the temple stand apart

And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.

Kahlil Gibran

READING 22 Master Speed, on his daughter's wedding

No speed of wind or water rushing by

But you have speed far greater. You can climb

Back up a stream of radiance to the sky,

And back through history up the stream of time.

And you were given this swiftness, not for haste,

Nor chiefly that you may go where you will,

But in the rush of everything to waste,

That you may have the power of standing still

Off any still or moving thing you say.

Two such as you with such a master speed

Cannot be parted nor be swept away

From one another once you are agreed

That life is only life for evermore

Together wing to wing and oar to oar.

Robert Frost Page 121

READING 23 The Gift of Friendship

Friendship is a priceless gift that cannot be bought or sold,

But its value is far greater than a mountain made of gold.

For gold is cold and lifeless, it can neither see nor hear,

And in the times of trouble it is powerless to cheer.

It has no ears to listen, no heart to understand.

It cannot bring you comfort or reach out a helping hand.

So when you ask God for a gift, be thankful if he sends

Not diamonds, pearls or riches, but the love of real true friends.

Friends, Today I will marry my best friend

The one I have laughed and cried with, The one I have learned from

and shared with, The one I have chosen to support, encourage and

give myself to through all these days God has given us to share.

Helen Steiner Rice

READING 24 from Notes to Myself

For communication to have meaning it must have a life.

It must transcend “you and me” and become “us”.

If I truly communicate, I see you in a life that is not me and become

part of it. And you see and partake of me. In a small way we grow

out of our old selves and become something new.

To have this kind of sharing I cannot enter a conversation

clutching myself. I must enter it with loose boundaries. I must give

myself to the relationship and be willing to be what grows out of it.

Hugh Prather

READING 25 A Tender Message

If you have a tender message Or a loving word to say

Do not wait until you forget it, But whisper it today;

The tender word unspoken, The letter never sent,

The long-forgotten messages,

The wealth of love unspent--

For these some hearts are breaking, For these some loved ones wait;

So show me that you care for them Before it is too late.

Frank Herbert Sweet Page 122

READING 26 The Owl and the Pussy Cat

The Owl and the Pussy-Cat went to sea

In a beautiful pea-green boat.

They took some honey, and plenty of money,

Wrapped up in a five-pound note.

The Owl looked up to the stars above

And sang to a small guitar,

'O lovely Pussy! O Pussy, my love,

What a beautiful Pussy you are.'

Pussy said to the Owl, 'You elegant fowl!

How charmingly sweet you sing!

O let us be married! Too long we have tarried:

But what shall we do for a ring?'

They sailed away for a year and a day,

To the land where the bong-tree grows,

And there in the wood a Piggy-wig stood

With a ring at the end of his nose.

His nose, his nose,

With a ring at the end of his nose.

“Dear Pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling Your ring?” Said the Pig,

“I will”.

So they took it away, and were married next day By the turkey who lives

in the hill.

They dined on mince, and slices of quince, Which they ate with a

runcible spoon;

And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand, They danced by the light of

the moon,

The moon, the moon,

They danced by the light of the moon.

Edward Lear Page 123

READING 27 We Will Not Wish you Joy

We will not wish you joy on this great day,

For Joy is in your hearts and goes with you along the fragrant,

mystic, sunlit way;

We will not wish you joy whilst love is new.

But this is our wish----May you be strong enough

To shelter love, and keep it safe from harm,

When winds blow high, and roads are steep and rough,

May you protect your love, preserve its charm.

When days are dark, may love be your sure light.

When days are cold, may love be your right fire,

Your guiding star when hope is out of sight,

The essence and sun of your desire.

May love be with you through the flight of years,

Then after storms, there will always be calm.

Though you have cause for heartache and for tears,

Despair lasts not, when love is there for balm.

This be the prayer we breathe for you today:

When you have reached the summit of life's hill,

May it be possible for you to say:

“Married long years, but we are lovers still.”

READING 28 I am

I am the living light

I am at peace and in harmony with all life and with all vibrations.

In all my being I grow ever upwards in the light and beauty of truth.

In all that I do at all times and in all ways.

May the living spirit be manifest in and through me,

that I may be a living light in the service of others. Page 124

READING 29 Carnal Cerebral Love

Carnal Cerebral Love

I want to make love to your mind

Stimulate me with your intellect, your insight and understanding.

Ignite me with random connections and your clever wit.

Carnal Cerebral Love

I want to make love to your inner being.

Allow me to delight in your orgasmic, dynamic mind.

Open up and invite me into the deep warmth of your soul.

Carnal Cerebral Love

Let our synapses dance entangle and connect at the same plateau.

Complete each other’s sentences, not our lives.

Carnal Cerebral Love, Our physical being

Our external egos decay daily and by the moment only our inner selves

intact

Denise Castellucci

READING 30 Art of Marriage

Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created. In the art of marriage, the little things are the big things.

It is never being too old to hold hands.

It is remembering to say, "I love you".

It is at no time taking the other for granted.

It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives; it is standing together facing the world.

It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. It is not expecting perfection in each other.

It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding, and a sense of humor.

It is having a capacity to forgive and forget. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, the dependence is mutual, and the obligation is reciprocal.

It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

It is not marrying the right partner; it is being the right partner.

It is discovering that your love for one another at its best will never lose sight of or be blotted out by the commonplace experiences of life. Page 125

READING 31 A Wedding Toast

(read by a dear friend to the Bride and Groom)

St. John tells how, at Cana's wedding-feast, The water-pots poured wine

in such amount That by his sober count there were a hundred gallons at the

least. It made no earthly sense, unless to show how whatsoever/ore elects

to bless Brims to a sweet excess. That can without depletion overflow.

Which is to say that what love sees is true;

That the world's fullness is not made but found. Life hungers to abound

And pour its plenty out for such as you.

Now, if your loves will lend an ear to mine,

I toast you both, good son and dear new daughter. May you not lack

for water, And may that water smack of Cana's wine.

Richard Wilbur

READING 32 Quiet Thoughts of the Seasons.

The quiet thoughts of two people a long time in love

Touch lightly, Like birds nesting in each other’s warmth

You will know them by their laughter

But to each other they speak mostly through their solitude.

If they find themselves apart, they may dream of sitting undisturbed

In each other's presence, of wrapping themselves warmly in each other's

ease.

As each Fall, when the trees shed their leaves to prepare

for the next Spring's growth and fruit.

May each year also bring closure-shedding the spent-

and bring rebirth to the spirit of your marriage.

Look ever to the future,

for in it lies the creative power for your own lives.

May you grow together like flowers and grass

and may your life be a dance to the music of love. Page 126

READING 33 Most Like an Arch This Marriage

Most like an arch--an entrance which upholds and shores the stone-

crush up the air like lace. Mass made idea, and idea held in place.

A lock in time. Inside half-heaven unfolds.

Most like an arch— two weaknesses that lean into a strength.

Two fallings become firm.

Two joined abeyance’s become a term naming the fact that teaches

fact to mean.

Not quite that? Not much less. World as it is,

what's strong and separate falters.

All you do at piling stone on stone apart from one another is roofless

around nothing. Till you kiss

You are no more than uptight and unset.

It is by falling in and in you make

the all-bearing point, for one another's sake,

in faultless fairing, raised by your own weight.

John Ciardi (adapted)

READING 34 Giving and Receiving

I launched a smile; far out it sailed On life's wide troubled sea.

And many more than I could count Came sailing back to me.

I clasped a hand while whispering, "The clouds will melt away".

I felt my life was very blessed, All through the hours that day.

I sent a thought of happiness Where it was needed sore,

And very soon thereafter, found Joy adding to my store.

I wisely shared my slender hoard, Toil earned coins of gold;

But presently it flowed right back Increased a hundred fold.

I helped another climb a hill, A little thing to do,

And yet it brought a rich reward, A friendship that was new.

I think each morning when I rise, Of how I may achieve,

I know by serving I advance, By giving I receive. Page 127

READING 35 Any Wife or Husband

Let us be guests in one another's house With deferential "No" and

courteous "Yes”

Let us take care to hide our foolish moods

Behind a certain show of cheerfulness.

Let us avoid all sudden silences;

We should find fresh and sprightly things to say;

I must be fearful lest you find me dull,

And you must dread to bore me any way.

Let us knock gently at each others heart,

Glad of a chance to look within - and yet

Let us remember that to force one's way

Is the unpardoned breach of etiquette.

So shall I be hostess- you, the host-

Until all need for entertainment ends;

We shall be lovers when the last door shuts

But what is better still – we shall be friends.

Carol Haynes

READING 36 Where There is Love

Where there is love-the heart is light, Where there is love the day is bright,

Where there is love there is a song.

To help when things are going wrong, Where there is love there is a smile-

To make all things seem more worthwhile,

Where there is love there is quiet peace,

A tranquil place where turmoils cease—

Love changes darkness into light And makes the heart take wingless flight,

Oh, blest are they who walk in love, They also walk with God above--

And when you walk with God each day

And kneel together when you pray,

Your marriage will be truly blest, And God will guide your daily quest

And love-that once seemed yours alone

God gently blends into His own.

Helen Steiner Rice Page 128

READING 37 In Love Forever

How can I stay in love with you forever?

How can we make our relationship into a lifetime of sharing and joy?

In order to stay in love Forever

I must first find the right person to love and I have, in you

In order to stay in love Forever

we both must understand each other

and ourselves vary well

and we must be completely honest

with each other at all times

We both must have our own goals and interests and actively pursue them

We both must have complete freedom of thought and we must

encourage each other to follow our dreams

We muse always be Fair, kind and supportive of each other

We must dedicate ourselves to being equal partners in all that we feel

and in all that we do.

We must promise each other that we will always create time

to just appreciate each other and our love and that we will never be lazy

and take our love For granted

In order for me to stay in love with you

Forever and have a relationship that is a lifetime of sharing and loving

I must really pledge myself to this wonderful commitment;

and I must really want to stay in love with you forever and I do

Susan Polis Schutz

READING 38 Love

Love is friendship that has caught fire.

It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving.

It is loyalty through good and bad times.

It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for

human weaknesses.

Love is content with the present, it hopes for the future,

and it doesn't brood over the past.

It’s the day-in and day-out chronicle of irritations,

problems, compromises,

small disappointments, big victories and working toward common goals.

If you have love in your life, it can make up,

for a great many things that are missing.

If you don't have love in your life, no matter what else there is,

It's not enough. Page 129

READING 39 Love is always

Love is an ocean of discovery

A multitude of experiences to treasure

It is the alliance of two lives for always

Not to become one life, but to be two hearts beating in time

Love will hold you near to one another

So that you never feel alone

It will keep you warm within

So that there never be frost around your hearts

Love will grow, will ripen and be ever strong

So that there never be emptiness in your souls

Love is the most precious gift to bestow

A resplendent gift to receive

And MARRIAGE is the promise to cherish your love

To guide its path and never let its glory pass unnoticed

Love is the rapture of this day that will be with you always

Fulfilling you, shining through you ALWAYS

Melissa Jaggard

READING 40 I Love You.

I love you

Because you have done more than any creed Could have done

to make me good.

And more than any fate Could have done

To make me happy.

You have done it Without a touch,

Without a word, Without a sign.

You have done it

By being yourself. Perhaps that is what Being a friend means,

After all.

Roy Croft. Page 130

READING 41 Now we are one

When thoughts take wing a wedding ring encircles all our dreams

And love abounds above, around,

enriching all our schemes

We plan together all our life

to make our dreams come true

When love is there a smile, a prayer, a hug, a kiss will do

And then together hand in hand

we go with love we've won

And you will see

the you and me

that once were two -- are one

Kate Fisher

READING 42 Best and most important

"It is therefore possible for a civilized man and woman to be happy

in marriage,

although if this is to be the case a number of conditions must be fulfilled.

There must be a feeling of complete equality on both sides;

there must be no interference with mutual freedom;

there must be the most complete physical and mental intimacy;

and there must be a certain similarity in regard to standards of values ...

Given all these conditions,

I believe marriage to be the best

and most important relation that can exist between two human beings."

Bertrand Russell

READING 43 Love’s Philosophy

The fountains mingle with the river, and the river with the ocean,

The winds of heaven mix forever, with a sweet emotion:

Nothing in the world is single; all things by a law divine,

in one another’s being mingle.

Why not I with thine?

See the mountains kiss high heaven and the waves clasp one another;

no sister flower would be forgiven if it disdained its brother and

the sunlight clasps the earth and the moon beams kiss the sea.

What are all these kissings worth, if thou kiss not me?

Percy Bysshe Shelly Page 131

READING 44 A Happy Couple.

A happy couple standing hand in hand

looking ahead to a promised land.

(Bride’s and Groom’s Names),

today as you promise to have and to hold,

and you seal those vows with small bands of gold.

As you journey the path of love together,

so stormy as well as sunny weather.

Remember there'll be some hills to climb,

but you will be guided from time to time.

So if ever you feel you've lost your way,

just look to each other, and think of this day

READING 45 This Day

This day we shall remember well, as in our married love we dwell

and cast our minds back to this time.

You made me yours and I you mine

In wedded love we choose to be, each binding each and yet each free.

As days and months and years go on, our love will hold us firm and

strong.

The marriage vow this day we say, a vow we'll build on day by day

and as we walk the path of life, the world will know we're man and wife.

We two who now are but one soul, have each to play a different role

and yet we know that all shall see, that bond of love twixt you and me.

For in this life we each shall care, that all we do is

all times fair, we pledge this day to be as one, in all those wondrous years

to come.

Brian Zouch Page 132

READING 46 A Marriage Blessing

As you enter into the little world that you promised to make brighter

for each other, may He who harnesses the waves and hangs the sun out

in the sky and puts the song in the birds especially bless you

and make your marriage a good and a happy one!

Love is indeed "a many splendored thing!"

When it is given and returned, it enriches both the Lover and the Beloved.

And as long as two people love each other, nothing in this world is

too difficult or too impossible, for wanting to do something for the one

you love takes all the burden out of it and the roughest way becomes

smooth when you can travel it hand in hand.

READING 47 What Is Love?

What is Love?

No words can define it, it’s something so great only God could design it.

Wonders of Wonders, beyond man’s conception,

And only in God can love find true perfection.

For love is enduring and patient and kind,

It judges all things with the heart not the mind,

And love can transform the most commonplace into beauty and splendor

And sweetness and grace . . .

For love is unselfish, giving more than it takes,

And no matter what happens love never forsakes,

It’s faithful and trusting and always believing,

Guileless and honest and never deceiving . . .

Yes, love is beyond what man can define,

For love is immortal. Page 133

READING 48 The Gift of Lasting Love

Love is much more than a tender caress

And more than bright hours of gay happiness,

For a lasting love is made up of sharing

Both hours that are “joyous” and also “despairing” . . . .

It’s made up of patience and deep understanding

And never selfish and stubborn demanding.

It’s made up of “climbing the steep hills together”

And facing with courage “Life’s stormiest weather” . . . .

And nothing on earth or in heaven can part

A love that has grown to be part of the heart

And just like the sun and the stars and the sea

This love will go on through eternity –

For “true love” lives on when earthly things die

For it’s part of the spirit that soars to the sky.

Helen Steiner Rice

READING 49 Blessed Are We.

Blessed are we to go forward with love,

For travel we will on the wings of a dove.

As we travel through life forsaking all others,

To be husband and wife, friends, and lovers.

To learn from each other the knowledge we hold,

And to face all tribulations and always be bold.

We are not as young as we would like to be,

But every new day will be a pleasure to see,

To share and to care for each other always,

And to love one another to the end of our days.

These are the vows we make here today,

And in our hearts we know they always will stay.

READING 50 Our Friendship

We have formed a friendship that has become invaluable to me.

We discuss our goals and plan our future.

We express our fears and talk about our dreams.

We can be very serious or we can just have fun.

We understand each other’s lives and try to encourage each other in all

that we do.

We have formed a friendship that makes our lives so much nicer.

Susan Polis Schutz Page 134

READING 51 Time and Love

Time is the essence of everyone’s life,

Take time with your loved ones

Have the time of your life.

For nobody knows what tomorrow may bring,

Be it luck, be it love,

Can be most anything.

But one thing I do know I’ll forever

Love you still,

My heart keeps on beating and my

Dreams fulfill.

Every minute, everyday, that you pass my way,

I’ll love you forever, tomorrow and today.

READING 52 Apache Wedding Prayer

Now you will feel no rain,

For each of you will be shelter to the other.

Now you will feel no cold,

For each of you will be warmth to the other.

Now there is no more loneliness,

For each of you will be companion to the other.

Now you are two bodies,

But there is only one life before you.

Go now to your dwelling place

To enter into the days of your togetherness

And may your days be good and long upon the earth.

READING 53 Comfort Together

Oh the comfort, the inexpressible comfort,

Of feeling safe with a person.

Having neither to weigh thoughts

Nor measure words, but pour them all out just as they are,

Chaff and grain together,

And a faithful hand will take and sift

Them, keep what is worth keeping,

And with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.

George Eliot Page 135

READING 54: Blessing of the Apaches

Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter for the other. Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other. Now there will be no loneliness, for each of you will be companion to the other. Now you are two persons, but there is only one life before you. May beauty surround you both in the journey ahead and through all the years, May happiness be your companion and your days together be good and long upon the earth. "Treat yourselves and each other with respect, and remind yourselves often of what brought you together. Give the highest priority to the tenderness, gentleness and kindness that your connection deserves. When frustration, difficult and fear assail your relationship - as they threaten all relationships at one time or another - remember to focus on what is right between you, not only the part which seems wrong. In this way, you can ride out the storms when clouds hide the face of the sun in your lives - remembering that even if you lose sight of it for a moment, the sun is still there. And if each of you takes responsibility for the quality of your life together, it will be marked by abundance and delight."

READING 55: Cherokee Prayer

God in heaven above please protect the ones we love. We honour all you created as we pledge our hearts and lives together. We honour mother-earth - and ask for our marriage to be abundant and grow stronger through the seasons; We honour fire - and ask that our union be warm and glowing with love in our hearts; We honour wind - and ask we sail though life safe and calm as in our father's arms; We honour water - to clean and soothe our relationship - that it may never thirsts for love; With all the forces of the universe you created, we pray for harmony and true happiness as we forever grow young together. Amen."

READING 56: When you are sad

When you are sad, I will dry your tears. When you are scared, I will comfort your fears. When you are worried, I will give you hope. When you are confused, I will help you cope. And when you are lost, and can't see the light, I will be your beacon, shining ever so bright. This is my oath; I pledge to the end. Why you may ask? Because you are my lover and friend Page 136

READING 57: We face the future

As we face the future together, I promise to stand by your side. I promise to unfailingly share and support your hopes, dreams and goals. I vow to be there for you always. When you fall, I will catch you. When you cry, I will comfort you. When you laugh, I will share your joy. Everything I am and everything I have is yours, from this moment forth and for eternity.

READING 58: From Song of Songs

Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm; for love is strong as death, passion fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of fire, a raging flame. Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If one offered for love all the wealth of his house, it would be utterly scorned.

READING 59: by George Eliot

What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined together to strengthen each other in all labour, to minister to each other in all sorrow, to share with each other in all gladness, to be one with each other in the silent unspoken memories?

READING 60: The Beatles

Love is all you need.

READING 61: by Krishnamurti

Love, and don’t be caught in opinions and ideas about what love is or should be. When you love, everything will come right. Love has its own action. Love, and you will know the blessings of it. Keep away from the authority who tells you what love is and what it is not. No authority knows and he who knows cannot tell. Love, and there is understanding. Page 137

READING 62: by Victor Hugo

Love is knowing that even when you are alone, you will never be lonely again. And great happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved. Loved for ourselves. And even loved in spite of ourselves.

READING 63: Hebrew Wedding Prayer

Blessed art thou, O Lord our God, King of the universe, who hath created joy and gladness, bridegroom and bride, mirth and exultation, pleasure and delight, love and brotherhood, peace and friendship. May there soon be heard in the cities of Judah, and in the streets of Jerusalem, the voice of joy and gladness, the voice of the bridegroom and the voice of the bride, the jubilant voice of bridegrooms from the wedding canopy, and of youths from their feasts of song. Blessed art thou, O Lord, who gives the Bridegroom joy in his bride.

READING 64: from the Talmut: (Ketubot 8)

Blessed art though, O Lord, King of the Universe, who created mirth and joy, bridegroom and bride, gladness, jubilation, dancing, and delight, love and brotherhood, peace and fellowship. Quickly, O Lord our God, may the sound of mirth and joy be heard in the streets of Judah and Jerusalem, the voice of bridegroom and bride, jubilant voices of bridegrooms from their canopies and youths from the feasts of song. Blessed art though, O Lord, who makes the bridegroom rejoice with the bride. Page 138

READING 65: Seven Benedictions

Blessed art Thou, O lord our God, King of the Universe who hast created the fruit of the vine. Blessed art Thou, O lord our God, King of the Universe who has created all things for His glory. Blessed art Thou, O lord our God, King of the Universe, creator of man. Blessed art Thou, O lord our God, King of the Universe who hast made man in his image, after his likeness, and hast prepared for him out of his very self, a perpetual fabric. Blessed art Thou, O Lord, creator of man. May she who was barren be exceedingly glad and rejoice when her children are united in her midst in joy. Blessed art Thou, O Lord, who makes Zion joyful through her children. O Lord, make these beloved companions greatly rejoice even as Thou didst rejoice at Thy creation in the Garden of Eden as of old. Blessed art Thou, O Lord, who makest bridegroom and bride to rejoice. Blessed art Thou, O lord our God, King of the Universe, who has created joy and gladness, bridegroom and bride, mirth and exultation, pleasure and delight, love, brotherhood, peace and fellowship. Soon may there be heard in the cities of Judah and in the streets of Jerusalem, the voice of joy and gladness, the voice of the bridegroom and the voice of the bride, the jubilant voice of the bridegrooms from the canopies, and of youths from their feasts of song. Blessed art Thou, O Lord who makest the bridegroom to rejoice with the bride. Page 139

READING 66: Seven Blessings New Jewish Wedding Anita Diamant

We acknowledge the Unity of all within the sovereignty of God, expressing our appreciation for this wine, symbol and aid of our rejoicing.

We acknowledge the Unity of all within the sovereignty of God, realizing that each separate moment and every distinct object points to and shares in this oneness.

We acknowledge the Unity of all within the sovereignty of God, recognizing and appreciating the blessing of being human.

We acknowledge the Unity of all within the sovereignty of God, realizing the special gift of awareness that permits us to perceive this unity and the wonder we experience as a man and a woman joined to live together.

May rejoicing resound throughout the world as the homeless are given homes, persecution and oppression cease, and all people learn to live in peace with each other and in harmony with their environment.

From the Divine, source of all energy, we call forth an abundance of love to envelop this couple. May they be for each other lovers and friends, and may their love partake of the same innocence, purity, and sense of discovery that we imagine the first couple to have experienced.

We acknowledge the Unity of all within the sovereignty of God, and we highlight today joy and gladness, bridegroom and bride, delight and cheer, love and harmony, peace and companionship. May we all witness the day when the dominant sounds through the world will be these sounds of happiness, the voices of lovers, the sounds of feasting and singing.

Praised is love; blessed be this marriage. May the bride and bridegroom rejoice together. Page 140

VOWS

VOW 1

(Bride’s Name), I am proud to take you as my wife for all of the time we

have been together

There has always been the kind of love and understanding which is

only shared when there is true love.

You have helped me triumph over challenges presented

Encouraged my personal growth and boosted my self esteem

You have helped me become the person I am today

and with your help I will be a better man, tomorrow than I was yesterday.

I love the way you love and care for me.

I love the way you trust and totally believe in me.

I love the way you always look your very best for me.

I love you now and I love my life with you.

Today as we begin our lives as husband and wife.

I totally commit myself to you.

(Groom’s Name), I take you as my husband. To say I love you is not

enough,

to try to condense the depth of my feelings into a few words is impossible.

It doesn't tell of the respect I have for you as an individual,

nor how I appreciate how tender and caring you really are

nor the joy I find in your warm laughter,

nor the tears I hold back for your pain,

nor the strength you give when I need it the most,

nor the pleasure I feel in your gentle touch.

But if to say, “I love you” means all these things.

Then let me say “I love you more each day”.

VOW 2

Minister: (Groom’s Name) will you take (Bride’s Name) to be your

lawful wife,

will you love her, honor and keep her in sickness and in health

and forsaking all others keep only unto her so long as you both shall live.

Response: I will.

Minister: (Bride’s Name) will you take (Groom’s Name) to be your

lawful

husband, will you love him, honor and keep him in sickness and in health

and forsaking all others keep only unto him so long as you both shall live.

Response: I will. Page 141

VOW 3

I commit myself to full closeness and to clearing up anything within me

that stands in the way.

I commit myself to my own complete development as an individual.

I commit to revealing myself fully in our relationship, not to

concealing myself.

I commit myself to the full empowerment of people around me.

I commit myself to acting from the awareness that I am 100 percent

the source of my reality.

I commit myself to having a good time in our marriage.

(Bride’s Name), I want to be with you always. I choose you above all

others to share my life with me in marriage.

I love you for yourself and I want you to become all that you can be.

I promise to honor this pledge as long as I live.

I commit myself to full closeness and to clearing up anything within me

that stands in the way.

I commit myself to my own complete development as an individual.

I commit to revealing myself fully in our relationship, not to

concealing myself.

I commit myself to the full empowerment of people around me.

I commit myself to acting from the awareness that I am 100 percent

the source of my reality.

I commit myself to having a good time in our marriage.

(Groom’s Name), I want to be with you always. I choose you above all

others to share my life with me in marriage.

I love you for yourself and I want you to become all that you can be.

I promise to honor this pledge as long as I live. Page 142

VOW 4

Minister: (Groom’s Name), will you have this woman to be thy lawful wedded wife/partner/spouse, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?

Response: I, (Groom’s Name), take thee/you, (Bride’s Name), to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee/you my troth.

Minister: (Bride’s Name), will you have this man to be thy lawful wedded husband/partner/spouse, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?

Response: I, (Bride’s Name), take thee/you, (Groom’s Name), to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee/you my troth.

--The Book of Common Prayer

VOW 5

Minister: Do you, (Groom’s Name), take this woman, (Bride’s Name), to be your wedded wife; and do you, in the presence of God and before these witnesses, promise and covenant to be to her a loving, faithful, and dutiful husband unto thee, until God shall separate you by death?"

Response: I do.

Minister: Do you, (Bride’s Name), take this man, (Groom’s Name), to be your wedded husband; and do you, in the presence of God and before these witnesses, promise and covenant to be to him a loving, faithful, and dutiful wife unto thee, until God shall separate you by death?"

Response: I do.

--Church of Scotland Page 143

VOW 6

Minister: (Groom’s Name), will you have (Bride’s Name), to be your wedded wife/spouse/partner, to live together in the covenant of faith, hope, and love according to the intention of God for your lives? Will you listen to her deepest thoughts, be tender hearted and kind/wise in your daily care of her, and stand faithfully at her side in sickness and in health? Choosing her above all others, will you undertake to care for her well-being of mind and body and spirit, as long as you both shall live?

Response: I will.

Minister: (Bride’s Name), will you have (Groom’s Name), to be your wedded husband/spouse/partner, to live together in the covenant of faith, hope, and love according to the intention of God for your lives? Will you listen to his deepest thoughts, be tender hearted and kind/wise in your daily care of him, and stand faithfully at his side in sickness and in health? Choosing him above all others, will you undertake to care for him well-being of mind and body and spirit, as long as you both shall live?

Response: I will.

--Adapted from a Baptist ceremony

VOW 7

I betroth you to me forever;

I betroth you to me with steadfast love and compassion,

I betroth you to me in faithfulness.

--Hosea 2:21-22, sometimes said in Jewish ceremonies

VOW 8

In the name of God,

I, (Groom’s Name), take you, (Bride’s Name), to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day onward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death.

This is my solemn vow.

In the name of God,

I, (Bride’s Name), take you, (Groom’s Name), to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day onward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death.

This is my solemn vow.

--Methodist ceremony Page 144

VOW 9

As the sign from my heart

that I desire to live with you

from this day forward as my wife and that you may remember

forever that I have chosen you above all others.

As the sign from my heart

that I desire to live with you

from this day forward as my husband, and that you may remember

forever that I have chosen you above all others.

VOW 10

(Groom’s Name) will you have (Bride’s Name) to be your wife, will

you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her in sickness and in

health, remaining faithful to her as long as you both shall live?

The groom replies: "I will."

Minister to the bride:

(Bride’s Name) will you have (Groom’s Name) to be your husband,

will you love him, comfort him. honor and keep him in sickness and

in health, remaining faithful to him as long as you both shall live?

The bride replies: "I will."

Celebrant to the Groom: "Repeat after me:"

I take you (Bride’s Name) to be my wife, To have and to hold from

this day forward, For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer,

To love and to cherish as long as we both shall live.

Celebrant to the bride: "Repeat after me:"

I take you (Groom’s Name) to be my husband, To have and to hold

from this day forward, For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer,

To love and to cherish as long as we both shall live.

VOW 11

I call upon these people here present to witness that I,

(Groom’s Name) take you (Bride’s Name) as my legally married wife.

I call upon these people here present to witness that I,

(Bride’s Name) take you (Groom’s Name) to be my legally

married husband. Page 145

VOW 12

I call upon these people here present to witness that I (Groom’s Name)

take you (Bride’s Name), as my lawfully wedded wife, to share with you

a relationship of love and of tenderness and laughter. I will stand by you

through all our tomorrows, respecting you as a person, your individuality,

your needs, your changes, and enjoy your love throughout our lives.

I call upon these people here present to witness that I (Bride’s Name) take

you (Groom’s Name), as my lawfully wedded husband, to share with you

a relationship of love and of tenderness and laughter. I will stand by you

through all our tomorrows, respecting you as a person, your individuality,

your needs, your changes, and enjoy your love throughout our lives.

VOW 13

Before those dear to us gathered here today I take you (Bride’s Name) for

my legally wedded wife. I vow to love, cherish and support you with my

life through all our tomorrows.

Before those dear to us gathered here today I take you (Groom’s Name)

for my legally wedded husband. I vow to love, cherish and support you

with my life through all our tomorrows.

VOW 14 (Medieval)

Sir wilt thou halve this woman to be thy wedded wife, to live together in

the state of matrimony? Wilt thou love her, respect her, honor and keep

her, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others keep thyself only

unto her as long as ye both shall live?

Lady wilt thou have this man to be thy wedded husband, to live together in

the state of matrimony? Wilt thou love him, respect him, honor and keep

him, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others keep thyself only

unto him as long as ye both shall live?

I (Groom’s Name) take thee (Bride’s Name), to be my wedded wife, to

have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer,

for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do

part, and thereto I plight thee my troth.

I (Bride’s Name) take thee (Groom’s Name), to be my wedded husband, to

have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer,

for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do

part, and thereto I plight thee my troth. Page 146

VOW 15

Groom: Today we cross an invisible line.

Bride: We leave behind our yesterdays and start our lives anew.

Groom: The past is over. We will concern ourselves only with the future.

Bride: It is a new day, a new commitment, a new life.

Groom: The vows we take today will change us forever.

Bride: I take them gladly.

Groom: I take them gladly, too.

Bride: (Groom’s Name), I promise to love you, to protect you, and to be

faithful to you for all the days of my life. I will soothe your hurts and

share your delights. I will do all in my power to make you as happy as I

am today.

Groom: (Bride’s Name), I promise to love you and honor you and to

always be honest with you. I will be faithful to you for all the days of my

life. I will believe only the best about you and look always for your good

qualities. I will do all in my power to make you as happy as I am today.

Bride: Today is the beginning of the rest of my life. I choose to spend

today, and all of my tomorrows, with you.

Groom: Today is the beginning of the rest of my life. I choose to spend it,

and all of my tomorrows, with you.

Groom: I love you, (Bride’s Name).

Bride: I love you, (Groom’s Name).

Groom: I want you for my wife, that we may share our lives with each other.

Bride: I want you for my husband, that our love may be sanctified by

this ceremony.

Groom: I promise to put you first in my life, knowing that our love is my

most precious possession.

Bride: I promise to put you first in my life, believing that all other

achievements pale beside a happy marriage.

Groom: I will share with you my joys, my sorrows, my hopes and my

dreams.

Bride: I will bring to you my accomplishments and my failures.

Groom: I will be faithful to you always. Page 147

Bride: And I will be faithful to you.

Groom: From this day forward, I will walk beside you.

When we are apart, my thoughts will be with you.

Bride: From this day forward, we stand together.

Whatever happens to either of us will be confronted by both.

Groom: I gladly make these promises. I am proud to be your husband.

Bride: I gladly make these promises. I am proud to be your wife.

Groom: Our vows are ended; our marriage has begun.

Bride: Let us go with joy into our new life together.

Groom: This is a day of rejoicing.

Bride: We rejoice in the goodness of love.

Groom: Because I love you, I promise to respect your wishes and opinions.

Bride: Because I love you, I promise to put our marriage above all else.

Groom: I will share with you my material goods, my thoughts, and my feelings.

Bride: I will share with you my material goods, my thoughts, and my feelings.

Groom: I promise to do all that I can to keep our relationship special to both of us.

Bride: I will cherish our time together. I will try to keep our home peaceful and harmonious.

Groom: I will encourage you to grow and to become all that you are

capable of becoming.

Bride: I will urge you to meet whatever challenges you may face.

Groom: I promise to be faithful to you in thought, word, and act.

Bride: I promise to be faithful to you in thought, word, and act.

This is a day of rejoicing.

Groom: We rejoice in the goodness of love. Page 148

VOW 16

Officiant: Marriage is not a legal document. No pastor or priest or justice

of the peace can create a marriage because a marriage, truly, is nothing

except the promises made and kept by two individuals. Today (Groom’s

Name) and (Bride’s Name) stand before us to publicly declare their love

and to share with us their marriage promises. (Groom’s Name), what

promises do you make?

Groom: I promise to love (Bride’s Name) with all my heart and mind and

strength. I promise to be faithful to her in thought, word and act for all the

days of my life. I promise to consider her welfare and happiness before I

make any decisions and I promise to offer her comfort, encouragement

and companionship.

Officiant: ( Bride’s Name), what promises do you make?

Bride: I promise to love (Groom’s Name) with all my heart and mind and

strength. I promise to be faithful to him in thought, word and act for all

the days of my life. I promise to consider his welfare and happiness

before I make any decisions and I promise to offer him comfort,

encouragement and companionship.

Officiant: Do you both, before these witnesses, pledge to do all in your

power to make this a happy and enduring union?

Together the Bride and Groom say: We do. Page 149

VOW 17 (Rose vow)

NOTE: The Groom will need to have a rose and the Bride will need a

vase with water in it. Before the ceremony, the vase and rose should be

placed in an easily accessible spot generally behind a lectern, for example.

The best man, the Maid of Honor, or the Minister should get the rose and

the vase just prior to this part of the service.

Minister: This is a day steeped in tradition, a time when we are surrounded

by symbols: something old, something new, something borrowed,

something blue.

Today, (Bride’s Name) and (Groom’s Name) begin a new tradition, a

custom which now becomes uniquely their own.

Groom: (Bride Name) I give you this rose. Because it grew from a tiny

seed, becoming stronger and larger until it burst into flower, it symbolizes

the way my love for you has grown. (He gives her the rose.) Each year on

our wedding anniversary, I will give you another rose. In so doing, I’ll

remember this day and renew the vows we've made.

Bride: (Groom's name), I give to you this vase of water. (He takes and

holds it.) Because water is the one element without which we would

perish, it symbolizes the importance of your love in my life. Each year on

our anniversary, I will refill this vase, offering it to you as a symbol of my

ever renewing love. (She puts the rose in the vase and they hold the vase

together.)

Groom: Without water, the rose would die.

Bride: Without the rose, the vase of water would not be beautiful.

Groom: My gift is enhanced by yours, just as my life is enhanced by ours.

Bride: My gift is lovely because of yours, just as my life is better because

of you. ( They hand the rose and vase to the Minister.)

Minister: On each anniversary, as you give and receive the rose and the

water, remember with joy this day when you pledged your love and your

lives to each other. May this be only the first of many cherished traditions

in a home filled with happiness. Page 150

VOW 18

Groom: Today is a new beginning. It is the start of a new way of life.

Bride: We don't know what challenges lie ahead. We know only that we

will face them together.

Groom: Because of you, I am a better person than I once was.

Bride: I promise always to see the good in you.

Groom: I will try to be worthy of your love and trust.

Bride: Because of you, I am a better person than I once was.

Groom: I promise always to see the good in you.

Bride: I will try to be worthy of your love and trust.

Groom: Before God and these witnesses, I vow to be loyal to you in every

way, to comfort you, to cherish you, and always to love you.

Bride: Before God and these witnesses, I vow to be loyal to you in every

way, to comfort you, to cherish you, and always to love you.

Groom: Today is a new beginning.

Bride: Our new life together has begun.

Groom: Love is more than an emotion. It is a way of life.

Bride: Love is more than a feeling. It is a channel through which all

feelings flow.

Groom: When I offer you my love, I offer all that is important in my life.

Bride: When I offer you my love, I let all of my deepest feelings flow

toward you.

Groom: Marriage is more than a ceremony. This service lasts less than an

hour but marriage is a lifetime of living together.

Bride: Marriage is more than a promise.

It is a promise kept; it is words translated into action.

Groom: As we begin living our promises, I pledge to you my love and

loyalty. I will share with you all that is important to me. I will encourage

peace and happiness between us.

Bride: As we begin living our promises, I pledge to you my love and

loyalty. I will share with you all that is important to me. I will encourage

peace and happiness between us. Page 151

VOW 19

Bride: I, (Bride’s Name), take you, (Groom’s Name), to be my husband.

I promise to be true to you always, in sickness and in health, in poverty or

wealth, in my thoughts and in my speaking. I will be your dearest friend,

your lover, and the mother of your children. With these vows, I commit

myself to you.

Groom: I, (Groom’s Name), take you, (Bride’s Name), to be my wife. I

promise to be true to you always, in sickness and in health, in poverty or

wealth, in my thoughts and in my speaking. I will be your dearest friend,

your lover, and the father of your children. With these vows, I

commit myself to you.

VOW 20

Minister: Marriage is an act of faith. It requires great trust to pledge ones

self to a lifetime with another person. Today (Groom’s Name) and

(Bride’s Name) demonstrate their faith and trust by pledging their love to

each other.

(Groom’s Name), what promises do you make to (Bride’s Name)?

Groom: (Bride’s Name), I affirm you now as my life partner. I promise to

stay with you in times of celebration and in times of mourning. I promise

to love you, honor you, and be faithful to you. I accept you, without

reservation, as my wife.

Minister: (Bride’s Name), what promises do you make to

(Groom’s Name)?

Bride: (Groom’s Name), I affirm you now as my life partner. I promise to

stay with you in times of celebration and in times of mourning. I promise

to love you, honor you, and be faithful to you. I accept you, without

reservation, as my husband.

Minister: By the promises they've made, (Groom’s Name) and (Bride’s

Name) have demonstrated their belief in love, in marriage, and in each

other. They ask now for the blessing of all who have witnessed their

vows. If you believe in their love and approve their marriage, please

applaud. Page 152

VOW 21

Groom: I promise to live in such a way that I will never bring dishonor

or heartache into our marriage.

Bride: I promise to keep our home a sanctuary of love, contentment

and compassionate understanding.

Groom: I pledge to you my patience, my honesty, and my faith in the

rightness of our love.

Bride: I pledge to you my patience, my honesty, and my faith in the

rightness of our love.

Groom: To the best of my ability, I will be your friend, your helpmate,

your counselor and your sweetheart.

Bride: To the best of my ability, I will be your friend, your helpmate,

your counselor and your sweetheart.

Groom: I love you and I want to be your husband.

Bride: I love you and I want to be your wife.

VOW 22

Minister: You are different people today than you were five years ago.

Five years from now, you will be different still. Yet, you are about to

make promises which are meant to last a lifetime.

May you grant each other the gift of growth.

Groom: (Bride’s Name), I expect you to change, just as I will change.

My promise to you is that, as I grow, I will share the growth with you.

Bride: I will not expect you always to think and believe exactly as you do

today. I will encourage your growth and you will encourage mine.

I promise to respect your opinions even when they differ from my own.

Groom: I promise to respect your opinions even when they differ from

my own.

Bride: I will be your partner but never your shadow.

Groom: I will be your equal but not your double. Page 153

Bride: I will bring to you my ideas and interests, not expecting you always

to have the same enthusiasms.

Groom: Our separate interests will keep our friendship from becoming

stagnant.

Bride: I will strive for a love that is flexible that adapts to your changing

needs.

Groom: I will strive for a love that is flexible that adapts to your changing

needs.

Minister: I offer you the good wishes of myself and these your guests.

As your love grows, may you also grow in the capacity to share it.

May every change bring you increased happiness.

VOW 23

Bride: I believe in love's ability to accept.

Groom: I believe in love's capacity to forgive.

Bride: I will accept you as you are. I will forgive you if you fail.

Groom: I will accept you as you are and forgive you if you fail.

Bride: Love demands respect but not obedience.

Groom: Love requires loyalty without subservience. I promise to respect

you as my equal and to be loyal to you in every way.

Bride: I promise to respect you as my equal and to be loyal to you in every

way.

Together: We believe in love. Page 154

VOW 24

Groom: Love thrives on honesty. I promise always to be truthful with you.

Bride: Love is nourished by thoughtfulness. I promise that my actions will

reflect my high regard for you.

Groom: I believe that the power of love can change lives.

My life is changed because I love you.

Bride: Love can bring joy, hope and strength.

Our love has brought all of those to me.

Groom: I promise that the home we are founding today will have love at

its core. I will do all that I can to nourish and enrich our love for each

other.

Bride: I promise that the home we are founding today will have love at its

core. I will do all that I can to nourish and enrich our love for each other.

VOW 25

Bride: When I felt empty inside, you poured your love into my hollow

heart and made me whole.

Now, my cup runneth over, my heart overflows with gladness.

Groom: When my frightened soul shed tears of loneliness, you offered me

your love and the shadows disappeared.

For all the gladness of this day, I thank you.

Bride: For all the years ahead, I rejoice.

Groom: I pledge to you now my love for all time and I ask you to be my

wife.

Bride: I accept gladly. I pledge to you now my love for all time

and I ask you to be my husband.

Groom: I accept gladly. Page 155

VOW 26

Bride: I love you for looking at me and seeing only the best.

Groom: I love you for listening to me and hearing only the good.

I will strive to become what you think I am.

Bride: In our times together, I promise to see you always through the eyes

of love.

Groom: In our times together, I promise to see you always through the

eyes of love.

VOW 27

Bride: I never meant to love so much. I meant to keep my emotions under control because I didn't want to be vulnerable.

Groom: I never meant to love so much. I intended to be rational and calm.

Bride: I thought I could care, but within boundaries.

Groom: I thought I could love, but with limitations.

Bride: I meant to let you be one part of my life; instead you have become more important than life itself.

Groom: I meant to keep our love in its own compartment; instead it has overflowed the boundaries into everything I say and do and feel.

Bride: I meant to be cautious.

Groom: I meant to stay uncommitted.

Bride: Now, because I do care so much, I am vulnerable. And I do not mind.

Groom: I joyfully accept the commitments of marriage.

Bride: From this day forward, I promise to love you willingly and completely, withholding nothing.

Groom: From this day forward, I promise to love you willingly and

completely, withholding nothing.

Bride: I never meant to love so much, but it has happened. And I am glad.

Groom: It has happened. And I am glad. Page 156

VOW 28

Groom: I take you, (Bride’s Name), to be my wife.

I join with you to share all that is to come.

Bride: I take you, (Groom’s Name), to be my husband.

I join with you to share all that is to come.

Groom: I will be faithful to you as long as God gives us life together.

Each rising sun will find you by my side.

Bride: I will be faithful to you as long as God gives us life together.

Each rising sun will find you by my side.

Groom: I will treasure our new life above all else.

Bride: I will treasure our new life above all else.

All that I am, and all that I ever hope to be, is yours.

Groom: All that I am, and all that I ever hope to be, is yours.

VOW 29 (Episcopal Vows)

Groom:

In the name of God, I, (name), take you, (name), to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. This is my solemn vow. Bride: In the name of God, I, (name), take you, (name), to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. Page 157

VOW 30 (Groom from the heart)

Here we stand before witnesses, to make vows this day,

Love, honor, cherish, until death, do they say.

This is my pledge, my promise, my creed,

These faith-given words, that I will now read.

For you, all my love, both body and soul

It’s what brought us together, it’s what makes us whole.

With our faith in the Church, we will walk with the Lord,

My life for yours, our destiny to unfold.

Honoring you is a task well received

For respect and commitment is something we need.

I will always respect you, on this long road ahead,

I commit my life to you, My love whom I wed.

One cherishes a treasure, something dear to the heart,

I will cherish your love, and always impart,

My thoughts and concerns, remain open, sincere,

Through good times and bad, every day of the year.

Until Death is a theme that is best left unsaid

For death has no place with the woman I wed.

But Eternal life, states our faith in the Son,

Means that even in death, we will always be one.

This ring that I give you is my promise of love,

Of our future together, with the Lord God above.

I take you as my wife, let true witness bear,

With this ring I wed, your life in my care. Page 158

VOW 31 (I Love you)

I love you. I pledge to grow in my Love for you. I pledge to nurture our Love for it is loving you that nurtures my soul.

I pledge to share our Love together as One. I love you because you are the only one for me. To know you is to know Love - and through you, know True Love.

I love you because you are the One who completes me. I can not know union without you - for it is by joining you that I learn about Love's union and where it comes from.

I love you because it is my soul mission in Life to learn our Love. I do not so much seek to heal you, but to embrace our Love that fills our Life as a way of healing each other. I see your Love for me in your eyes and I see what freedom is, what True Love is.

I promise to support your growth and share the fullness of myself. I promise to honor you by being open to all the expressions of your inner self. I promise to allow our Love we share become our Prayer we live. Above all, I promise to be true to you and true to myself so that we may grow in our Love that joins us as one.

If the Eagle is the symbol of freedom born out of True Love, then I am one wing and you are equally the other. Let us fly together in harmony and may gentle winds carry us all the way to Heaven. Page 159

VOW 32 (From the heart)

I offer you not the 'summer of my life', but the autumn brisk and vibrant. I promise to be a companion worthy of your precious friendship. I pledge you compassion in good times and bad, encouragement in sickness and health. It is with my intent that our life together include our large circle of friends and our loving families. We'll cherish the memories of our individual pasts; and create our new life as we go along together.

VOW 33 (I prayed to God)

I prayed to God for a companion who could understand me and accept me as I am and for a special friend who would share laughter and tears - and he sent you.

Grooms Vows:

[Brides name], I promise to love you with all my heart, mind and strength. I promise to be faithful, now and forever. I also promise to respect your children and treat them as if they were my own. I gladly accept the obligations that go along with this pledge. I care for your children and want them to be a part of my life.

Brides Vows:

With continued love, friendship, trust and communication, I [Brides name] take you today in committing my life to yours. [Grooms name] when you need me I will be there and when your strength fails you, may mine always be there for you. Side by side, step by step, may our great journey together begin, here now from this day forward. Page 160

VOW 34 (I offer you)

I offer you not the 'summer of my life', but the autumn brisk and vibrant. I promise to be a companion worthy of your precious friendship. I pledge you compassion in good times and bad, encouragement in sickness and health. It is with my intent that our life together include our large circle of friends and our loving families. We'll cherish the memories of our individual pasts; and create our new life as we go along together.

VOW 35 (I prayed)

My beloved, romance may fade, but true love endures. I choose to truly love you, with kindness, faithfulness, and respect, through every circumstance that life may bring.

Because you are the treasure of my heart, it will be my joy to support, encourage, comfort, and defend you as we together face the coming days of sorrow and joy, sickness and health, poverty and wealth.

When I have been wronged, I will forgive. When I do wrong, I will confess with contrition. When conflict dims our days, I will exercise the patience of true love and seek the light of wise counsel. Most of all, I will rejoice and thank the Lord for completing me with the gift of you. And through His infinite grace, I know that no matter what may come, I will remain by your side with enduring devotion and fidelity for as long as He allows us to share this earthly life.

This is my solemn vow because, in you, I have found the one my soul loves. May the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit guide us and bless us each day from this moment forward Page 161

VOW 36 (My beloved vow)

My beloved, romance may fade, but true love endures. I choose to truly love you, with kindness, faithfulness, and respect, through every circumstance that life may bring.

Because you are the treasure of my heart, it will be my joy to support, encourage, comfort, and defend you as we together face the coming days of sorrow and joy, sickness and health, poverty and wealth.

When I have been wronged, I will forgive. When I do wrong, I will confess with contrition. When conflict dims our days, I will exercise the patience of true love and seek the light of wise counsel. Most of all, I will rejoice and thank the Lord for completing me with the gift of you. And through His infinite grace, I know that no matter what may come, I will remain by your side with enduring devotion and fidelity for as long as He allows us to share this earthly life.

This is my solemn vow because, in you, I have found the one my soul loves. May the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit guide us and bless us each day from this moment forward Page 162

VOW 37 (Long vows)

I, [Groom's name], take you [Bride's name], to be my wife, my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our friendship and love you today, tomorrow, and forever. I will trust you and honor you I will laugh with you and cry with you. I will love you faithfully Through the best and the worst, Through the difficult and the easy. What may come I will always be there. As I have given you my hand to hold So I give you my life to keep So help me God

I, [Bride's name], take you [Groom's name], to be my husband, my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our friendship and love you today, tomorrow, and forever I will trust you and honor you I will laugh with you and cry with you. I will love you faithfully Through the best and the worst, Through the difficult and the easy. What may come I will always be there. As I have given you my hand to hold So I give you my life to keep So help me God In unison: Entreat me not to leave you, or to return from following after you, For where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God. And where you die, I will die and there I will be buried. Page 163

VOW 38 (Rose Vows and Ring Vows)

PLEASE NOTE: The Groom will need to have the roses and the Bride will need a vase with water in it. Before the ceremony, the vase and roses should be placed in an easily accessible spot generally behind a lectern, for example. The best man, the Maid of Honor, or the Minister should get the roses and the vase just prior to this part of the service.

Minister: This is a day steeped in tradition, a time when we are surrounded by symbols: something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. Today, (Brides name) and (Grooms name) begin a new tradition, a custom which now becomes uniquely their own.

Groom: I give you this, a yellow rose, the symbol of friendship. With this symbol, I honor the friendship you offer and that we have created in our lives together.

(Gives Bride the yellow rose).

Groom: I give you this, a blue rose, a special rose. With this symbol, I honor the special meaning you have given to my life.

(Gives Bride the blue rose).

Groom: I give you this, a red rose, the symbol of love. Because it grew from a tiny seed, becoming larger and stronger until it burst into a flower, it symbolizes the way my love for you has grown.

(Gives Bride the red rose).

Each year on our wedding anniversary, I will give you these roses. In so doing, I will remember and renew the vows we’ve made this day.

Bride: I give you this vase of water. (Groom takes vase and holds it). Because water is the one element without which we would perish, it symbolizes the importance of your love in my life. Each year on our anniversary, I will refill this vase, offering it to you as the symbol of my ever-renewing love. (Bride puts the roses in the vase and they hold it together). Page 164

(Turn towards guests)

Groom: Without water, the roses would die.

Bride: Without the roses, the vase of water would not be beautiful.

(Turn back towards each other)

Groom: My gift is enhanced by yours, just as my life is enhanced by ours.

Bride: My gift is lovely because of yours, just as my life is better because of you.

(Both hand Minister the vase and roses)

Minister: On each anniversary, as you give and receive these roses and water, remember with joy this day when you pledged your love and your lives to each other. May this be the first of many cherished traditions in a home filled with love and happiness.

The wedding ring is the outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual bond, which unites two loyal hearts in endless love. It is a seal of the vows they have made to one another. Bless O God these rings that (Brides name) and (Grooms name), who give them, and who wear them, may ever abide in thy peace. Living together in unity, love and happiness for the rest of their lives.

(Grooms name), what symbol do you have as a pledge of these vows? (Best man holds out the ring, which Groom takes), As you place this ring, a visible sign of your commitment in marriage, on the third finger of (Brides name) left hand, please recite your vows:

Groom: (Brides name), I give you this ring as a symbol of our vows, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, With this ring, I thee wed.

Minister: (Brides name), what symbol do you have as a pledge of these vows? (Maid of Honor holds out the ring, which Bride takes) As you place this ring, a visible sign of your commitment in marriage, on the third finger of (Grooms name) left hand, please recite your vows:

Bride: (Grooms name), I give you this ring as a symbol of our vows, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, With this ring, I thee wed. Page 165

Minister: (Grooms name) will you take (Brides name) to be your lawfully wedded wife, will you love her, honor and keep her in sickness and in health and forsaking all others keep only unto her so long as you both shall live.

Groom: I do.

Minister: (Brides name) will you take (Grooms name) to be your lawfully wedded husband, will you love him, honor and keep him in sickness and in health and forsaking all others keep only unto him so long as you both shall live.

Bride: I do.

Minister: In as much as you have each pledged to the other your lifelong commitment, love and devotion, I now pronounce you husband and wife, in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Those whom God has joined together let no one put asunder. (Grooms name), You may now kiss your bride! Page 166

CHILDRENS VOWS

Example 1

Introduction: Often marriage is viewed as the union of two persons. In reality, marriage is much broader. It is always a joining of families.

The Unity of God's Family We are, in fact, all members of one family. Recognition of Children As part of the family nature of this marriage we recognize ___________ and (his/her/their) importance.

Presentation of gifts to children (this/these, pendants/rings/lapel pins) we pledge to you, _______________, our continuing love even as we surround you with our arms of support.

Reading from THE PROPHET "...You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.

" Prayer for the Family We give thanks, O Lord, for the relationship here celebrated. In your presence we are humbled by the recognition that today we face a new future, one which love has unfolded and is unfolding before our very eyes.... Introduction of the Family It is my pleasure to present to you _____________ and _____________ in their new relationship as husband and wife and their child (ren)

Example 2

Invite children forward.

I have pledged my love to you and promised to be a faithful husband. Now I want to add another, different kind of vow. I promise to love (Children's Names) for all of our days and to treat them as if they were my own. I gladly accept the obligations that go along with this pledge. I love (Children's Names) and want them to be part of my life. Page 167

Example 3

Children’s Unity Candle Ceremony

(Bride's and Groom's Names) light the candles which represent love for each other and for (Child's Name). From the uniqueness of these separate flames, they kindle a larger and brighter flame which represents the union between (Groom's, Bride's and Child's Names). The side candles remain burning to symbolize the continuing importance of the individual integrity within the marriage relationship. The greater height of the center candle depicts their belief that together they can become more than either could alone.

Example 4

Will the children please come forward.

Children are a part of living and of life and one of the major aspects of becoming married is to share your future, (Grooms Name and Brides Name) with these your children (Children’s Names).

All Children need guidance and fortitude in becoming citizens of the world and with this in view, I now ask (Grooms and Brides Name) to please repeat these vows together after me.

We both promise to you (Children’s Names) that we will love you and respect your needs as we go through life as a family. We also promise that we will offer you guidance, strength and fortitude, whenever and wherever these are needed. Today we are all joined together as one family and we will face the future together.

We now present these gifts to you and ask that you will remember this special day with love and affection. Page 168

Example 5

Children please step forward.

Children from another relationship that for whatever reason has ceased to be, presents a challenge for one or both parents and comes with very special and unique challenges.

(Whichever is the initial parent) (Children’s Name) we have been together now for a long time and we have become part of one another’s life and that will not alter in this new family relationship. What will alter is that instead of one parent you will now have two people to support and guide you. I love you now and will always love you.

(The other parent) (Children’s Name) I promise to you today that I will be of support to you, so that as a family unit we will become stronger and more united. Just as (Initial parents name) has been with you and loved you, so shall I love and care for you.

Example 6

Children please come forward.

These children presented to us all here today are very special children, they are special because they are being united into a family unit once again. Man and woman together make up along with children a family unit and give balance to each other, from and to each other.

I now ask (Grooms and Brides Names) to acknowledge that together you both will support and love these children and bring them up as true and honest children and adults into this world.

(Response from both parents) We will. Page 169

RING VOWS

VOW 1

(Bride’s Name), with this ring, I thee wed.

(Groom’s Name), with this ring, I thee wed.

VOW 2

(Minister to the Groom)

(Groom’s Name) what symbol do you have as a pledge of these vows?

(Best man holds out the ring, which the Groom takes)

(Minister to Groom)

As you place this ring, a visible sign of your commitment in

marriage, on the third finger of (Bride’s Name) left hand,

repeat after me:

(Bride’s Name) we will wear these rings, and the world will know that

I am yours and you are mine.

(Minister to the Bride)

(Bride’s Name) what symbol do you have as a pledge of these vows?

(Best man holds out the ring, which the Bride takes)

(Minister to Bride)

As you place this ring, a visible sign of your commitment in

marriage, on the third finger of (Groom’s Name) left hand,

repeat after me:

(Groom’s Name) we will wear these rings, and the world will know that

I am yours and you are mine. Page 170

VOW 3

(Said by the Bride as she accepts the ring.)

(Groom’s Name) I thank you for this beautiful ring, I accept it as

a symbol that we are one with each other.

This ring will remind me of you, 1 will wear it with love,

all of my life.

(Said by the Groom as he accepts the ring.)

(Bride’s Name) I thank you for this beautiful ring, I accept it as

a symbol that we are one with each other.

This ring will remind me of you, 1 will wear it with love,

all of my life.

VOW 4

(Bride’s Name) this ring I give you, my personal gift and my

personal promise, of love and trust, and pride that you are my wife.

(Groom’s Name) this ring I give you, my personal gift and my

personal promise, of love and trust, and pride that you are my husband.

VOW 5

As the sign from my heart

that I desire to live with you

from this day forward as my wife, and that you may

remember forever that I have chosen you above all others,

I give you this ring as a sign of my love.

As the sign from my heart

that I desire to live with you

from this day forward as my husband, and that you may

remember forever that I have chosen you above all others,

I give you this ring as a sign of my love. Page 171

VOW 6

This ring is my precious gift to you,

as a measure of my love and as a sign that from this day forward your

every breath shall be surrounded by my love.

I give you this ring as a sign

that I choose you to be my beloved,

and that I offer myself as your husband

today, tomorrow, and always.

This ring is my precious gift to you,

as a measure of my love and as a sign that from this day forward your

every breath shall be surrounded by my love.

I give you this ring as a sign

that I choose you to be my beloved,

and that I offer myself as your wife

today, tomorrow, and always.

VOW 7

I (Groom’s Name) marry you with this ring, with my heart, with my body,

and with all the syllables of my soul.

I (Bride’s Name) marry you with this ring, with my heart, with my body,

and with all the syllables of my soul.

VOW 8

As a symbol of how endlessly happy you make me

and of how crazy I am about you,

I give you this ring, my dear sweetheart, so you and the whole world will

know how much and how always I love you.

As a symbol of how endlessly happy you make me

and of how crazy I am about you,

I give you this ring, my dear sweetheart, so you and the whole world will

know how much and how always I love you. Page 172

VOW 9

I give you this ring as the symbol that

I have cast my lot with yours, that I am bound to you always,

through my love, with my soul, and all my heart.

I give you this ring as the symbol that

I have cast my lot with yours, that I am bound to you always,

through my love, with my soul, and all my heart.

VOW 10

This ring is a token of my endless and abiding love, because it is you,

(Bride’s Name), whom I love, and it is you whom I am choosing always

to encircle with my love.

This ring is a token of my endless and abiding love, because it is you,

(Groom’s Name), whom I love, and it is you whom I am choosing always

to encircle with my love.

VOW 11

Wear it in health.

Wear it in joy.

Wear it in peace.

Wear it in bliss.

Wear this ring in health because you have healed me.

Wear it in joy because you have made my heart glad.

Wear it in peace because you have brought me serenity.

Wear it in bliss because you have brought me true grace

VOW 12

I hope you will wear this ring as a reminder that I love you every single

day of your life.

VOW 13

I love you, (Bride’s Name).

Here, this is my ring. Can we go steady for life?

I love you, (Groom’s Name).

Here, this is my ring. Can we go steady for life? Page 173

VOW 14

Darling, I ask you to receive this ring as a symbol of my love and as a

constant reminder that I have chosen you above all others to be the one to

share my life.

VOW 15

May this ring be the sign, always, that we love one another.

May it be the symbol, always, that we have chosen to serve one another

in perfect freedom.

May it be the public demonstration that our love is complete and

never ending.

May it be the object that tells, when we as ourselves are no more and

our bones have crumbled to dust, that our love in this life was real

and eternal and deep.

VOW 16

(Bride’s Name), I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all

that I am, and all that I have, I honor you.

(Groom’s Name), I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all

that I am, and all that I have, I honor you.

--Adapted from a Protestant ceremony

VOW 17

Receive this ring as a token of wedding love and troth.

--Lutheran ceremony

VOW 18

With this ring I thee wed, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of

the Holy Ghost. Amen.

--The Book of Common Prayer Page 174

VOW 19

Behold thou art consecrated to me with this ring, according to the Law

of Moses and of Israel.

Act of espousal recited by Jewish bridegroom while

placing ring on bride's right forefinger.

VOW 20

In the Church of Scotland ceremony, the couple do not speak at

the exchanging of rings. Rather, as the couple places the rings on their

fingers and then hold hands, the Minister says:

By this sign you take each other, to have and to hold, from this day

forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in

health; to love and to cherish, till death do you part.

VOW 21

I give you this ring in token of the vow made between us and as a sign

of my love and affection for you

VOW 22

I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and as a sign of my promise.

VOW 23

I give you [or: I accept] this ring as a symbol of my love and as a sign of

my promise.

VOW 24

Having made these promises to you, I take you today to be my lawful

wife whatever life may hold for us, and as a symbol of this love and

trust I give you this ring.

Having made these promises to you, I take you today to be my lawful

husband whatever life may hold for us, and as a symbol of this love and

trust I give you this ring. Page 175

VOW 25

I give you this ring (or bracelet) as a symbol of my love forever for you.

VOW 26

I give you this ring as a sign of my promise and a token of my love.

VOW 27

I give you this ring as a token of my love and as evidence of the vow we

have made. Wear it as a symbol of all that we share together.

I give you [or accept} this ring as a token of my love and as evidence of

the vow we have made. Wear it (or I will wear it) as a symbol of all that

we share together.

VOW 28

With this ring I wed you, and promise my faithful love.

VOW 29

This ring is a token of my faithfulness and love and a symbol that all I

have I share with you. Let this ring symbolize our one life together.

I accept this ring as a symbol of our one life together.

VOW 30

("Medieval")

With this ring I thee wed. With my body I thee honor, and with all my

worldly goods I thee endow. Page 176

VOW 31 Blessing & Exchange of Rings

The Blessing of the Rings; The wedding ring is the outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual bond which unites two loyal hearts in endless love. It is a seal of the vows [Groom's name] and [Bride's name] have made to one another. Bless O God these rings, that [Bride's name] and [Groom's name], who give them, and who wear them, may ever abide in thy peace. Living together in unity, love and happiness for the rest of their lives The Exchange of rings: I [Bride's name], give you this ring as a symbol of our vows, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, With this ring, I thee wed.

I [Groom's name], give you this ring as a symbol of our vows, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, With this ring, I thee wed.

Declaration of Marriage:

In as much as you have each pledged to the other your lifelong commitment, love and devotion, I now pronounce you husband and wife, in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Those whom God has joined together let no one put asunder. [Groom's name], you may kiss your bride!

Have fun with your ceremony and remember, it up to you to make it as memorable and personal as possible! 

May God continue to bless you!